I think DH wants me to punish DD for a really stupid reason...
It occurred to me that DH was VERY poor growing up. He never received Chrisistmas or birthday gifts. They very rarely could afford a hot supper. It is possible that there were times when they couldn't afford heat at all.
Perhaps, this is some psychological attempt to compensate for that with his own children.
I have always chalked it up to "it's more important to him" because he gets so upset if it gets cool in the house. And, honestly I may be miserable when it's hot, but not emotional. So, I have always done my best to keep me and the kids comfy, and DH happy too.
We went to the Zoo today. It was 70 and cloudy all day! Beautiful zoo weather!
DH made the kids bring their coats from the car, even after her heard me tell them to leave them, because we wouldn't need them.
When the kids got sick of carrying them (about 10 minutes in) I told them "make Dad carry them, it was his idea to get them out of the car."
DH complained that the kids are old enough to carry their own coats.
I insisted that no, the kids and I all wanted to leave them in the car, so since he forced the kids to bring tem HE could carry them. All 6 hours we were there. The kids didn't wear them for a minute.
Edit 2: a lot of you have asked if this is a troll post. No, it's not.
I'm sure some of you can guess my SN based on my DH über controlling nature.
Yes, he is controlling in other ways. He is very controlling over just about everything the kids or I do. An example from today: DH told me to fold the laundry and walk the dogs, then clean out his car. He didn't ask, he told me to. When I asked if he'd be a bit more gracious next time, he told me he had to work this morning and I should just do it for him without complaining.
DD did NOT get punished. He did lecture her about obeying him. I told her she will never be in trouble for trying to be comfortable, as long as she wasn't hiring anyone else. And I promised i'd make sure of it. DH isn't speaking to me. BUT DD is happy. :)
ETA: so DD got up this morning and said "it feels so good in here." I'd turned the heat off and left it alone. It was about 71.
So, I went out and bought DH a couple of hoodies.
He can suck it up. It's so much more comfortable. I am going to tell him to ask the kids how they feel before he touched the thermostat.
The problem is that he thinks they don't know how they feel. He thinks he knows better.
And Im not sure what to do about it. United front, united front, united front. That's what I always try to get my husband to present to the kids. That's what I always want for the kids see from us. DH and I presenting a totally united front to the kids. That means always backing each other up.
But this time I think my DD got completely shafted, and I don't want to back him up on it.
DH keeps the house at 80 all the time. It's hot, and miserable. But DH feels cold if its set to anything less. I sweat constantly. Dd (who is 8) wears nothing but tank tops and short shorts. Ds(5) takes after me, and is always sweaty. He actually asks to take baths twice a day to cool off, get the sweat off. I have fought with DH. I have asked him nicely. I have asked him to wear a hoodie in the house. I have tried going behind his back and changing the thermostat. He INSISTS on keeping it 80.
Well last night DH and I tucked the kids in and Dd (who is 8 ill remind you) turned on the fan in her room. DH turned it off. When he left the room, she turned it back on. She was hot. DH came in and turned it off again. So at some point DD got up, changed from pjs into one of her brother's basketball shirts and a pair of her shorts, pulled all the covers off her bed except the sheet, and got back into bed. She was hot.
Well at about 3am DH got up to get ready for work and was "cold" it was a freezing 77 in our house! And he comes back into our room and wakes me "When you get up in the morning I want you to tell DD she's grounded!"
I asked why. He said because he went in there and she was uncovered. So I got up, thinking maybe she was naked?? Or something? Nope. So I asked him why again. He said "it is freezing in this house, she knows better!" I tried to tell him, no she's just feeling hot. I think at 8, she should decide if she's comfortable or not.
DH says no, she's too young, and it's freezing in the house. She absolutely has to be grounded. She put herself in danger! (What danger people? Of getting a good night of sleep?)
I don't want to do it. Hell, I wanted to leave the fan on for her in the first place.
Oh, and poor DS's hair is so soaked in sweat right now his pillow has a big wet spot. As soon as DH left, I turned it down to 73.
So, would you back DH up? Or refuse, saying DD shouldn't be punished for trying to get comfy? DH has threatened to punish her (or DS) before for the same reason. (Trying to make it cooler than DH wants in their rooms). So DD did know that she *could* get into trouble for doing what she did.