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Are you kidding me? I might lose my whole family over a toe! (he finally called :( )

Posted by Anonymous   + Show Post

Out of nowhere my husband looks at my son's feet and says "you have mortons toe" I don't know what the hell that means so I ignore it. Then he asks me if I have it. I told him I don't know what that is. He says it means that the second toe is longer than the first. I was like, I dont' know. So he asks to see my goddamn feet. 

I don't have it. Okay no big deal. So DH gets on the computer and tells me that he thinks it's a recessive trait. Whatthefuckever that means. I'm like, maybe your dad has it or something. Then he says no. You can only have it if one of your parents have it. 

I just looked at him for a sec, then he got up and walked out. His phone is off. Our son by the way is 9 and asking me what the hell just happened and I don't know what to tell him.

He called :(

He just called to tell me he doesn't want to come home tonight. He already sounds drunk. He said the older DS gets the more he feels like he isn't his son and it's been eating at him every day. WTF! NOW he wants a paternity test. How the hell do I explain all this to DS? I should have never came back to this fool!

Update this morning.

I have to get DS to school. He didn't come home, I checked our bank account and he stayed at a motel about a block from here. After I drop DS off at school I'll go buy a paternity test.

I have a test. I talked to DH. Of course he feels terrible now and says he thinks his meds are just off, whatever. We're doing the test today and I told him he needs to apologize to ds after school

Posted by Anonymous on May. 1, 2013 at 8:26 PM
Replies (371-380):
by on May. 2, 2013 at 7:11 AM
Posted on CafeMom Mobile
by Ruby Member on May. 2, 2013 at 7:13 AM

I would be gone in a New York minute!  He sounds like he is looking for an easy way out of your relationship hun.  :( 

by Anonymous 58 on May. 2, 2013 at 7:20 AM
1 mom liked this
Oh yeah that is nice, teach a child that someone NEEDS a beer as if it is ok to need one.

NEEDING a few beers makes someone an alcoholic.

Honestly I would tell my son that something is wrong with daddy and Ye won't be home for a few days bc there is no way in Hell I'd let him come home and honestly I would be filing for divorce.

Quoting Anonymous:

My kid is freaking out and I told him dad just needs to go have a few beers but I don't know whats going on

Quoting Anonymous:

What an ass.

by Anonymous 59 on May. 2, 2013 at 7:24 AM

lol, googles mortons toe and saw this on the 2nd line of pictures. might want to go further down the page ;)

in all reality.. i hope that's photo shopped.

Quoting Anonymous:

This is my mom's foot.   I dont' think it's anything to break up a family.  

by Anonymous 1 - Original Poster on May. 2, 2013 at 7:27 AM

I offered twice, he declined.

Quoting Anonymous:

Gonna play devil's advocate. This wouldn't even be an issue if you would have just offered a paternity test in the very beginning. Would have either confirmed or eased his fears.

by Anonymous 60 on May. 2, 2013 at 7:29 AM

so leave the fool, get the test and move on with your life WITHOUT HIM!!!  WHAT AN ASSHOLE HE IS!!!

by Gold Member on May. 2, 2013 at 7:34 AM
Sounds like he's looking for an "out". Show him the door and tell him not to let it hit him in the ass.
by Anonymous 1 - Original Poster on May. 2, 2013 at 7:34 AM

You're wrong. He raised him for 9 years. To say he owes him nothing is disgusting. That is his father no matter what. Again I'm not sure how this is my fault when he knew everything and uninitiated the relationship anyway. I hate the attitude that some of you women have on this site. Men are helpless and you are all a bunch of women haters.

Quoting xoch86:

Calm down honey, my comment wasn't that serious.. I wasn't even judging.. 

you had to have wanted him back as well if u left your "boyfriend" to be with him, and then stayed when he cheated on u to "get even"... I'm trying to understand why YOU took him back? It doesn't seem like u love him too much if ur ready to throw in the towel over a blow up like this... He's a douche for what he did, yes.. But he's been holding on his feelings for almost 10 years! Give m a little bit of credit, he's hurting.. And if it ends up that this is NOT his son, then your sons pain is YOUR fault, and YOUR fault alone for cheating. I just hope that ur husband is caring enough to look past that truth, and embrace your son as he has, regardless..

just remember that if you leave him, and he isn't his son, he owes YOU and OUT son NOTHING. And your attitude on this will only make your son suffer when your stand denies that child because of it.

good luck.

Quoting Anonymous:

You're ridiculous. This is on him. He wanted me back, he knew I had a boyfriend, he said no to the dna tests, I offered, he cheated too. This is not on me.

Quoting xoch86:

Well.. Good luck with that..
Either get the DNA test, and hope he accepts him as his son regardless of the results...
OR leave him for even asking( although you can't blame him..

I say, get the DNA test and hope for the best..
He's was being honest when he said its been eating at him, as he deserves to know the truth. You need to own the fact that you cheated and this is the consequence of that. Bad timing yes, bad way of bringing it up.. Absolutely.. But the truth needs to come out one way or another.

by on May. 2, 2013 at 8:06 AM

Quoting harpsichord:

Totally read your username as GoddessDandruff

Quoting GoddessNDaRuff:


Quoting Anonymous:

Sounds as though he has been looking for away out of the marriage and that is all he could come up with!

by Ruby Member on May. 2, 2013 at 8:06 AM


Your ninth grade teacher had old information.  It used to be thought that.

  It is a multi-gene trait, and research found it to be neither dominant nor recessive.   Multi gene traits do not inherit like recessive OR dominant.

Think about it for a minute.   The trait can be either slight or extreme or any amount in between.   How could that happen if it were controlled by one gene?   The answer is it is NOT controlled by one gene.

To the op: if your husband is going to end this marriage over this, you might as well have accurate information about it.

The plain fact is that he can no more determine the parentage of his son by looking at his toes than I can predict what the weather will be this afternoon by looking at which letters float to the top of my alphabet soup.

Just remember: MOST things that were thought to be controlled by one gene, it turns out they are not.   

People spent a very, very long time insisting complex characteristics made up of many different traits,were controlled by one gene.   Then when a single gene couldn't be found, the same people insisted those many characteristics must be determined by the environment.   Both are ridiculous premises if you think about it.   There is no 'schizophrenia gene', there is no 'autism gene', there is no 'smart gene', there are hundreds of them, if not more. 

Genes not only code for miniscule things like one gene coding for one chemical in a process that involves thousands of steps and thousands of other chemicals, they simply are not well behaved.    Two fair skinned people can have a dark skinned baby, babies are born with one eye one color and the other eye a very different color, identical twins often do not show the same genetically based illness, genes simply do not fit into that neat little punnet squarer.

Quoting xtwistedxlovex:

Ah...I was told by my ninth grade science teacher it's a recessive trait. Still not sure why he was looking at my feet to begin with o.O

Quoting lancet98:


t is not recessive, and it is not dominant.   It is multi-gene.

Quoting xtwistedxlovex:

It IS a recessive trait, but that doesnt mean it can't be passed down through those who don't display it. Look into punnet squares.

Quoting Anonymous:

Really? So he's fucking wrong? HAHAHAHA Thats great, thanks for the info. He's going to feel like a fool.

Quoting gypsy_rose:

Nether i nor my sons father had it but ds does.






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