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Are you kidding me? I might lose my whole family over a toe! (he finally called :( )

Posted by Anonymous   + Show Post

Out of nowhere my husband looks at my son's feet and says "you have mortons toe" I don't know what the hell that means so I ignore it. Then he asks me if I have it. I told him I don't know what that is. He says it means that the second toe is longer than the first. I was like, I dont' know. So he asks to see my goddamn feet. 

I don't have it. Okay no big deal. So DH gets on the computer and tells me that he thinks it's a recessive trait. Whatthefuckever that means. I'm like, maybe your dad has it or something. Then he says no. You can only have it if one of your parents have it. 

I just looked at him for a sec, then he got up and walked out. His phone is off. Our son by the way is 9 and asking me what the hell just happened and I don't know what to tell him.



He called :(

He just called to tell me he doesn't want to come home tonight. He already sounds drunk. He said the older DS gets the more he feels like he isn't his son and it's been eating at him every day. WTF! NOW he wants a paternity test. How the hell do I explain all this to DS? I should have never came back to this fool!



Update this morning.

I have to get DS to school. He didn't come home, I checked our bank account and he stayed at a motel about a block from here. After I drop DS off at school I'll go buy a paternity test.


I have a test. I talked to DH. Of course he feels terrible now and says he thinks his meds are just off, whatever. We're doing the test today and I told him he needs to apologize to ds after school

Posted by Anonymous on May. 1, 2013 at 8:26 PM
Replies (381-390):
lancet98
by Platinum Member on May. 2, 2013 at 8:22 AM

 

That isn't why they get so pissed off when a woman says she had an affair.

It's a knee jerk reaction; they feel threatened.

Why....you might run out and steal THEIR man.   That's why they jump all over you.

Ok, now sit back and watch them deny it('having an affair is a sin!', and blah blah blah).  

Further, the sympathy for the man is also a knee jerk reaction - of COURSE their precious little snowflake wouldn't cheat unless he was torn away from them by some scheming, shimmying weasel of a jezebel with magical powers to bewitch....understand?

Quoting Anonymous:

You're wrong. He raised him for 9 years. To say he owes him nothing is disgusting. That is his father no matter what. Again I'm not sure how this is my fault when he knew everything and uninitiated the relationship anyway. I hate the attitude that some of you women have on this site. Men are helpless and you are all a bunch of women haters.

Quoting xoch86:

 

Calm down honey, my comment wasn't that serious.. I wasn't even judging.. 

you had to have wanted him back as well if u left your "boyfriend" to be with him, and then stayed when he cheated on u to "get even"... I'm trying to understand why YOU took him back? It doesn't seem like u love him too much if ur ready to throw in the towel over a blow up like this... He's a douche for what he did, yes.. But he's been holding on his feelings for almost 10 years! Give m a little bit of credit, he's hurting.. And if it ends up that this is NOT his son, then your sons pain is YOUR fault, and YOUR fault alone for cheating. I just hope that ur husband is caring enough to look past that truth, and embrace your son as he has, regardless..

just remember that if you leave him, and he isn't his son, he owes YOU and OUT son NOTHING. And your attitude on this will only make your son suffer when your stand denies that child because of it.

good luck.

Quoting Anonymous:

You're ridiculous. This is on him. He wanted me back, he knew I had a boyfriend, he said no to the dna tests, I offered, he cheated too. This is not on me.

Quoting xoch86:

Well.. Good luck with that..
Either get the DNA test, and hope he accepts him as his son regardless of the results...
OR leave him for even asking( although you can't blame him..

I say, get the DNA test and hope for the best..
He's was being honest when he said its been eating at him, as he deserves to know the truth. You need to own the fact that you cheated and this is the consequence of that. Bad timing yes, bad way of bringing it up.. Absolutely.. But the truth needs to come out one way or another.

 

 

 

 

 

 

Anonymous
by Anonymous - Original Poster on May. 2, 2013 at 8:51 AM

lol

Quoting lancet98:


That isn't why they get so pissed off when a woman says she had an affair.

It's a knee jerk reaction; they feel threatened.

Why....you might run out and steal THEIR man.   That's why they jump all over you.

Ok, now sit back and watch them deny it('having an affair is a sin!', and blah blah blah).  

Further, the sympathy for the man is also a knee jerk reaction - of COURSE their precious little snowflake wouldn't cheat unless he was torn away from them by some scheming, shimmying weasel of a jezebel with magical powers to bewitch....understand?

Quoting Anonymous:

You're wrong. He raised him for 9 years. To say he owes him nothing is disgusting. That is his father no matter what. Again I'm not sure how this is my fault when he knew everything and uninitiated the relationship anyway. I hate the attitude that some of you women have on this site. Men are helpless and you are all a bunch of women haters.

Quoting xoch86:


Calm down honey, my comment wasn't that serious.. I wasn't even judging.. 

you had to have wanted him back as well if u left your "boyfriend" to be with him, and then stayed when he cheated on u to "get even"... I'm trying to understand why YOU took him back? It doesn't seem like u love him too much if ur ready to throw in the towel over a blow up like this... He's a douche for what he did, yes.. But he's been holding on his feelings for almost 10 years! Give m a little bit of credit, he's hurting.. And if it ends up that this is NOT his son, then your sons pain is YOUR fault, and YOUR fault alone for cheating. I just hope that ur husband is caring enough to look past that truth, and embrace your son as he has, regardless..

just remember that if you leave him, and he isn't his son, he owes YOU and OUT son NOTHING. And your attitude on this will only make your son suffer when your stand denies that child because of it.

good luck.

Quoting Anonymous:

You're ridiculous. This is on him. He wanted me back, he knew I had a boyfriend, he said no to the dna tests, I offered, he cheated too. This is not on me.

Quoting xoch86:

Well.. Good luck with that..
Either get the DNA test, and hope he accepts him as his son regardless of the results...
OR leave him for even asking( although you can't blame him..

I say, get the DNA test and hope for the best..
He's was being honest when he said its been eating at him, as he deserves to know the truth. You need to own the fact that you cheated and this is the consequence of that. Bad timing yes, bad way of bringing it up.. Absolutely.. But the truth needs to come out one way or another.








bluediamondmom
by Bronze Member on May. 2, 2013 at 10:23 AM
And it sounds like he's NOT completely forgiven her for it and still wonders if the boy is his.

Quoting gypsy_rose:

she cheated on him around the time of conception.




Quoting GremlinMom:

He most definitely needed a beer. That man is thinking way too much lol. Geez. Really? ug. 


Posted on CafeMom Mobile
lancet98
by Platinum Member on May. 2, 2013 at 11:06 AM

 

The old saying about affairs is that a woman forgives and forgets, and a man never forgets OR forgives.

Even if he had revenge sex to revenge your revenge sex that happened because of his revenge sex.   Or whatever.

My suggestion?   Sounds like the apple cart is pointed down the hill.

Quoting bluediamondmom:

And it sounds like he's NOT completely forgiven her for it and still wonders if the boy is his.

Quoting gypsy_rose:

she cheated on him around the time of conception.




Quoting GremlinMom:

He most definitely needed a beer. That man is thinking way too much lol. Geez. Really? ug. 


 

 

xoch86
by Gold Member on May. 2, 2013 at 11:19 AM


Negative.. Why in the hell woild I be a hater to your situation? I'm not a cheater. My husband knows without a doubt he is my children's father No hate here.. I just like to look at things from both perspectives.

to say he owes him nothingisn't disgusting. It's TRUE. He doesn't owe a child who isn't his a damn this, BUT if he is a good man, he will continue his relationship because like u said he raised him for 9 years. But come on.. U have to admit, 9 years is a long time to let something like this fester.. He didn't ask for a DNA test way back when, because like u said, he was trying to win to back. Doesn't mean it wasn't bugging him.. And it finally came to a boiling point. You HAVE to be just a little bit sensitive to that. Again, the way he is going about it IS wrong.. BUtwhy would it be wrong to want to know the truth? No matter how much time has passed. 


I don't get how u don't understand that this IS your fault. YOUR actions are the reason this is happening, how can u not see that?if you wouldn't have cheated in the first place(which I don't see u even regretting at this point, sad..) this wouldnt even be a question. It is what it is...like a PP said, "you reap what u sow"..


and I will say again, I do not agree with the way he went about it, I don't beleive it's right to punish the child for the decisions you made, and I hope that he can continue the relationship with this child regardless of his paternity... But I understand why he wouldn't..

Quoting Anonymous:

You're wrong. He raised him for 9 years. To say he owes him nothing is disgusting. That is his father no matter what. Again I'm not sure how this is my fault when he knew everything and uninitiated the relationship anyway. I hate the attitude that some of you women have on this site. Men are helpless and you are all a bunch of women haters.

Quoting xoch86:


Calm down honey, my comment wasn't that serious.. I wasn't even judging.. 

you had to have wanted him back as well if u left your "boyfriend" to be with him, and then stayed when he cheated on u to "get even"... I'm trying to understand why YOU took him back? It doesn't seem like u love him too much if ur ready to throw in the towel over a blow up like this... He's a douche for what he did, yes.. But he's been holding on his feelings for almost 10 years! Give m a little bit of credit, he's hurting.. And if it ends up that this is NOT his son, then your sons pain is YOUR fault, and YOUR fault alone for cheating. I just hope that ur husband is caring enough to look past that truth, and embrace your son as he has, regardless..

just remember that if you leave him, and he isn't his son, he owes YOU and OUT son NOTHING. And your attitude on this will only make your son suffer when your stand denies that child because of it.

good luck.

Quoting Anonymous:

You're ridiculous. This is on him. He wanted me back, he knew I had a boyfriend, he said no to the dna tests, I offered, he cheated too. This is not on me.

Quoting xoch86:

Well.. Good luck with that..
Either get the DNA test, and hope he accepts him as his son regardless of the results...
OR leave him for even asking( although you can't blame him..

I say, get the DNA test and hope for the best..
He's was being honest when he said its been eating at him, as he deserves to know the truth. You need to own the fact that you cheated and this is the consequence of that. Bad timing yes, bad way of bringing it up.. Absolutely.. But the truth needs to come out one way or another.







xoch86
by Gold Member on May. 2, 2013 at 11:36 AM


Lol seriously? That's a joke.. U might run out and steal my man... That's laughable! 

I have NEVER denied that my husband can cheat, but that doesn't mean he will. I trust my husband, which leads me to believe that it's not gonna happen and until he gives me a reason to believe it there isn't much use to giving that idea a thought.

and for the record, I am a firm believer that if a man cheats,it's on him, and ONLY HIM.. Sure I'd probably beat the females head in, but at the end of the day, she isn't my problem..he is.. But certainly not after he cheats

Quoting lancet98:


That isn't why they get so pissed off when a woman says she had an affair.

It's a knee jerk reaction; they feel threatened.

Why....you might run out and steal THEIR man.   That's why they jump all over you.

Ok, now sit back and watch them deny it('having an affair is a sin!', and blah blah blah).  

Further, the sympathy for the man is also a knee jerk reaction - of COURSE their precious little snowflake wouldn't cheat unless he was torn away from them by some scheming, shimmying weasel of a jezebel with magical powers to bewitch....understand?

Quoting Anonymous:

You're wrong. He raised him for 9 years. To say he owes him nothing is disgusting. That is his father no matter what. Again I'm not sure how this is my fault when he knew everything and uninitiated the relationship anyway. I hate the attitude that some of you women have on this site. Men are helpless and you are all a bunch of women haters.

Quoting xoch86:


Calm down honey, my comment wasn't that serious.. I wasn't even judging.. 

you had to have wanted him back as well if u left your "boyfriend" to be with him, and then stayed when he cheated on u to "get even"... I'm trying to understand why YOU took him back? It doesn't seem like u love him too much if ur ready to throw in the towel over a blow up like this... He's a douche for what he did, yes.. But he's been holding on his feelings for almost 10 years! Give m a little bit of credit, he's hurting.. And if it ends up that this is NOT his son, then your sons pain is YOUR fault, and YOUR fault alone for cheating. I just hope that ur husband is caring enough to look past that truth, and embrace your son as he has, regardless..

just remember that if you leave him, and he isn't his son, he owes YOU and OUT son NOTHING. And your attitude on this will only make your son suffer when your stand denies that child because of it.

good luck.

Quoting Anonymous:

You're ridiculous. This is on him. He wanted me back, he knew I had a boyfriend, he said no to the dna tests, I offered, he cheated too. This is not on me.

Quoting xoch86:

Well.. Good luck with that..
Either get the DNA test, and hope he accepts him as his son regardless of the results...
OR leave him for even asking( although you can't blame him..

I say, get the DNA test and hope for the best..
He's was being honest when he said its been eating at him, as he deserves to know the truth. You need to own the fact that you cheated and this is the consequence of that. Bad timing yes, bad way of bringing it up.. Absolutely.. But the truth needs to come out one way or another.









Anonymous
by Anonymous 61 on May. 2, 2013 at 11:43 AM

Because of a TOE!! OMFG Leave his ass like PRONTO! If he is going to be THAT fucking stupid.....Oh HELL NO!

lancet98
by Platinum Member on May. 2, 2013 at 11:45 AM
1 mom liked this

 

I'm not about to steal anyone's man.   I've got one that fulfills my every need, which at 60, consists of having someone who I can stare at and wonder where in god's name he learned how to sit at a table and use a fork.

Quoting xoch86:

 

Lol seriously? That's a joke.. U might run out and steal my man... That's laughable! 

I have NEVER denied that my husband can cheat, but that doesn't mean he will. I trust my husband, which leads me to believe that it's not gonna happen and until he gives me a reason to believe it there isn't much use to giving that idea a thought.

and for the record, I am a firm believer that if a man cheats,it's on him, and ONLY HIM.. Sure I'd probably beat the females head in, but at the end of the day, she isn't my problem..he is.. But certainly not after he cheats

Quoting lancet98:

 

That isn't why they get so pissed off when a woman says she had an affair.

It's a knee jerk reaction; they feel threatened.

Why....you might run out and steal THEIR man.   That's why they jump all over you.

Ok, now sit back and watch them deny it('having an affair is a sin!', and blah blah blah).  

Further, the sympathy for the man is also a knee jerk reaction - of COURSE their precious little snowflake wouldn't cheat unless he was torn away from them by some scheming, shimmying weasel of a jezebel with magical powers to bewitch....understand?

Quoting Anonymous:

You're wrong. He raised him for 9 years. To say he owes him nothing is disgusting. That is his father no matter what. Again I'm not sure how this is my fault when he knew everything and uninitiated the relationship anyway. I hate the attitude that some of you women have on this site. Men are helpless and you are all a bunch of women haters.

Quoting xoch86:

 

Calm down honey, my comment wasn't that serious.. I wasn't even judging.. 

you had to have wanted him back as well if u left your "boyfriend" to be with him, and then stayed when he cheated on u to "get even"... I'm trying to understand why YOU took him back? It doesn't seem like u love him too much if ur ready to throw in the towel over a blow up like this... He's a douche for what he did, yes.. But he's been holding on his feelings for almost 10 years! Give m a little bit of credit, he's hurting.. And if it ends up that this is NOT his son, then your sons pain is YOUR fault, and YOUR fault alone for cheating. I just hope that ur husband is caring enough to look past that truth, and embrace your son as he has, regardless..

just remember that if you leave him, and he isn't his son, he owes YOU and OUT son NOTHING. And your attitude on this will only make your son suffer when your stand denies that child because of it.

good luck.

Quoting Anonymous:

You're ridiculous. This is on him. He wanted me back, he knew I had a boyfriend, he said no to the dna tests, I offered, he cheated too. This is not on me.

Quoting xoch86:

Well.. Good luck with that..
Either get the DNA test, and hope he accepts him as his son regardless of the results...
OR leave him for even asking( although you can't blame him..

I say, get the DNA test and hope for the best..
He's was being honest when he said its been eating at him, as he deserves to know the truth. You need to own the fact that you cheated and this is the consequence of that. Bad timing yes, bad way of bringing it up.. Absolutely.. But the truth needs to come out one way or another.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 


 

Era5182
by Bronze Member on May. 2, 2013 at 11:50 AM
I have it and so does dh but none of our kids do.
xoch86
by Gold Member on May. 2, 2013 at 11:51 AM


Lol nice! Every woman's dream! ;)

Quoting lancet98:


I'm not about to steal anyone's man.   I've got one that fulfills my every need, which at 60, consists of having someone who I can stare at and wonder where in god's name he learned how to sit at a table and use a fork.

Quoting xoch86:


Lol seriously? That's a joke.. U might run out and steal my man... That's laughable! 

I have NEVER denied that my husband can cheat, but that doesn't mean he will. I trust my husband, which leads me to believe that it's not gonna happen and until he gives me a reason to believe it there isn't much use to giving that idea a thought.

and for the record, I am a firm believer that if a man cheats,it's on him, and ONLY HIM.. Sure I'd probably beat the females head in, but at the end of the day, she isn't my problem..he is.. But certainly not after he cheats

Quoting lancet98:


That isn't why they get so pissed off when a woman says she had an affair.

It's a knee jerk reaction; they feel threatened.

Why....you might run out and steal THEIR man.   That's why they jump all over you.

Ok, now sit back and watch them deny it('having an affair is a sin!', and blah blah blah).  

Further, the sympathy for the man is also a knee jerk reaction - of COURSE their precious little snowflake wouldn't cheat unless he was torn away from them by some scheming, shimmying weasel of a jezebel with magical powers to bewitch....understand?

Quoting Anonymous:

You're wrong. He raised him for 9 years. To say he owes him nothing is disgusting. That is his father no matter what. Again I'm not sure how this is my fault when he knew everything and uninitiated the relationship anyway. I hate the attitude that some of you women have on this site. Men are helpless and you are all a bunch of women haters.

Quoting xoch86:


Calm down honey, my comment wasn't that serious.. I wasn't even judging.. 

you had to have wanted him back as well if u left your "boyfriend" to be with him, and then stayed when he cheated on u to "get even"... I'm trying to understand why YOU took him back? It doesn't seem like u love him too much if ur ready to throw in the towel over a blow up like this... He's a douche for what he did, yes.. But he's been holding on his feelings for almost 10 years! Give m a little bit of credit, he's hurting.. And if it ends up that this is NOT his son, then your sons pain is YOUR fault, and YOUR fault alone for cheating. I just hope that ur husband is caring enough to look past that truth, and embrace your son as he has, regardless..

just remember that if you leave him, and he isn't his son, he owes YOU and OUT son NOTHING. And your attitude on this will only make your son suffer when your stand denies that child because of it.

good luck.

Quoting Anonymous:

You're ridiculous. This is on him. He wanted me back, he knew I had a boyfriend, he said no to the dna tests, I offered, he cheated too. This is not on me.

Quoting xoch86:

Well.. Good luck with that..
Either get the DNA test, and hope he accepts him as his son regardless of the results...
OR leave him for even asking( although you can't blame him..

I say, get the DNA test and hope for the best..
He's was being honest when he said its been eating at him, as he deserves to know the truth. You need to own the fact that you cheated and this is the consequence of that. Bad timing yes, bad way of bringing it up.. Absolutely.. But the truth needs to come out one way or another.













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