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Mom Confessions Mom Confessions

Letter from Walmart!

Anonymous
Posted by Anonymous
  • 14 Replies
1 mom liked this

Dear Mrs. Woolf,

Over the past six months, your husband has caused quite a commotion in our store. We cannot tolerate this behavior and have been forced to ban both of you from the store. Our complaints against your husband, Mr. Woolf, are listed below and are "documented by our video surveillance cameras":

1. June 15: He took 24 boxes of condoms and randomly put them in other people's carts when they weren't looking.

2. July 2: Set all the alarm clocks in Housewares to go off at 5-
minute intervals.

3. July 7: He made a trail of tomato juice on the floor leading to the
women's restroom.

4. July 19: Walked up to an employee and told her in an official
voice, 'Code 3 in Housewares. Get on it right away'. This caused the
employee to leave her assigned station and receive a reprimand from her Supervisor that in turn resulted in management getting involved causing management to lose time and costing the company money.

5. August 4: Went to the Service Desk and tried to reserve a bag of
chips.

6. August 14: Moved a 'CAUTION - WET FLOOR' sign to a carpeted area.

7. August 15: Set up a tent in the camping department and told the
children shoppers they could come in if they would bring pillows and
blankets from the bedding department - to which twenty children
obliged.

8. August 23: When a clerk asked if they could help him he began
crying and screamed, 'Why can't you people just leave me alone?'
Emergency Medics were called.

9. September 4: Looked right into the security camera and used it as a mirror while he picked his nose.

10. September 10: While handling guns in the Sports department, he
asked the clerk where the antidepressants were.

11. October 3: Darted around the Store suspiciously while loudly
humming the ' Mission Impossible' theme.

12. October 6: In the auto department, he practiced his 'Madonna look' by using different sizes of funnels.

13. October 18: Hid in a clothing rack and when people browsed
through, yelled 'PICK ME! PICK ME!'

14. October 22: When an announcement came over the loud speaker, he assumed the fetal position and screamed 'OH NO! IT'S THOSE VOICES AGAIN!

15. Took a box of condoms to the checkout clerk and asked where the fitting room was.

And last, but not least:

16. October 23: Went into a fitting room, shut the door, waited
awhile, and then yelled very loudly, 'Hey! There's no toilet paper in
here.' One of the Staff passed out.

I wonder if I'll have to go along on many more shopping trips?




This is funny... 

Posted by Anonymous on May. 3, 2013 at 2:18 PM
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Replies (1-10):
Anonymous
by Anonymous - Original Poster on May. 3, 2013 at 2:18 PM

Bump

Nicoleb9
by Emerald Member on May. 3, 2013 at 2:20 PM
I don't know if this is true or not, but I lol'd at that list.
Posted on CafeMom Mobile
Anonymous
by Anonymous on May. 3, 2013 at 2:21 PM
2 moms liked this
That joke is so old it needs help crossing the street.
Nicoleb9
by Emerald Member on May. 3, 2013 at 2:21 PM
1 mom liked this
Sounds like things Peter from Family Guy would do.
Posted on CafeMom Mobile
Anonymous
by Anonymous - Original Poster on May. 3, 2013 at 2:24 PM


I did too... gave me some ideas haha. But I doubt anyone has the guts to do half the stuff on that list! lol

Quoting Nicoleb9:

I don't know if this is true or not, but I lol'd at that list.



briellesmomma
by Velvet on May. 3, 2013 at 2:25 PM
Lmfao OMG that's hilarious
Mommie_to_Bee
by Bronze Member on May. 3, 2013 at 2:25 PM
That's funny. I love number 10. That would freak anyone out.
Anonymous
by Anonymous on May. 3, 2013 at 2:25 PM
That's actually from a list of how to annoy people at Walmart. But the letter version is funny, too.
embrigmom
by Gold Member on May. 3, 2013 at 2:27 PM

I saw this on fb. It's funny!!!

JNLmomme09
by on May. 3, 2013 at 2:28 PM
Lmao


Quoting Anonymous:

That joke is so old it needs help crossing the street.

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