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I made daughter throw ALL of it away! edit under pic in OP- final edit on added

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 Tiara is 9 and has forgotten who is boss around here and push me over the edge this morning! her wearing makeup has been a constant battle! I didnt get any makeup for her, other people give it to her as gifts @@ and she has also gotten into MY makeup! she keeps putting it on darker and darker and we have had many discussions about it! In march she snuck some of her and MY makeup into her suticase to go visit grandma after i told her no makeup. I find it in her backpack, she knows she is NOT to wear it at school!

this morning we were getting ready to go to lunch and my cousins house and I told her 'NO makeup". i know she heard me because she told me I am ruining her life, lol! she was taking too long to get ready so I opened her bedroom door and sure enough she was putting makeup on!

i emptied her bedroom trach can and told her to put ALL of her makeup in it! told her that if i find ANY hidden she would be grounded a day for each item, in addition to being grounded right now for an undetermined amount of time til I calm down and can think rationally!

its not just the makeup thats an issue, but an overall attitude of her doing whatever she pleases no matter what I say. so its time for "attitude adjustment 101"

Tiara throwing away her makup! she didnt want a picture taken but I told her that she would need it as a reminder!

edit: she got to keep her nailpolish, lol! I told her if it went on her face she had to throw it away. she asked if she could keep chapstick and i agreed to that.

I try my best to let her express herself! she has permenate hair color stripes in her hair that I put in myself! she has 2 piercings in each ear. she ownes two pair of combat boots. she dresses like a girly girl one day and a punk rocker the next, lol! but the whole point here is that she is breaking rules and sneaking. I have compromised on the makeup before saying she could wear it at home and out sometimes if it looked natural. but again she breaks the rules! I dont have time for her scrub her face as we need to walk out the door! I specifically told her "no makeup" today and she heard me and chose to be defiant! this is NOT the first time! she has had waaay too many chances on this topic!

last edit: I cant keep up, lol! she is aware that breaking the rule is the problem, not the makeup, as I told her about some other things that she has been defiant about lately that will change too. she understood what she did was very wrong. she went about cleaning her room etc with no lip. she layed down on my bed and chatted with me afterwards. when i dropped her off at her dads at 6pm she gave me plenty of hugs and kisses... she got over it quicker than yall did, lol! her 10th bday is the end of july. I think I might get her some LIGHT eyeshadow and LIGHT tinted lipgloss and go over the rules and consequences again. I am not trying to stop her from having fun, experimenting etc. she just has to learn that rules are rules and if she doesnt like something then we need to discuss it, but breaking the rules out right will not end well!

by on May. 4, 2013 at 2:39 PM
Replies (41-50):
twade26
by on May. 4, 2013 at 2:52 PM
1 mom liked this

My mom did this to me and it did not stop me from wearing makeup it just made me better at hiding it from her. Maybe you guys can compromise. Like maybe she is only allowed to wear one thing of makeup and it has to be neutral in color.

JP-StrongForTwo
by on May. 4, 2013 at 2:52 PM
1 mom liked this

haha my DD is the same. 

Quoting acrogodess:

I am so glad that my dd rarely gives me lip and when she does all I have to is bark, "WHAT!?!" and she looks down and mutters "Nothing." and says nothing back when I go, "You better not have said anything." 

Lol. We never have those battles. She is 10. She does love her shoes and clothes though. 


hgibsonorc
by Bronze Member on May. 4, 2013 at 2:53 PM
7 moms liked this
You really should examine the root of the disobedience and why she feels like she needs makeup anyway. How in tune are you with her? It doesn't sound like she trusts or respects you, which is deep rooted and needs to be addressed. Shaming and embarrasing as a form of Punishment breeds more rebellion.
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Babybear89
by Silver Member on May. 4, 2013 at 2:55 PM
Go momma! She should have listened tge first time
Anonymous
by Anonymous 11 on May. 4, 2013 at 2:55 PM
4 moms liked this
Had a similar problem. Except I did the opposite. I let her wear(she was 8 1/2). I let the school know of what I was doing and asked for a week tops.
Within a that week she was made fun of and made to realize that make up wasn't/isn't for 8 1/2 yr olds. I also showed her the "correct" way of applying make up...less is more. I made a day of it(Saturday). She's 17 now and doesn't wear a stitch of make up,accept maybe weddings,formal events. I obviously don't live in your home and don't know any of the circumstances but instead of pulling the typical I'm the boss and I said so act...try something a little less dramatic. As you know,kids learn by watching and an adult would hopefully know how to choose her/his battles. With my experience in raising children(22,17,15,&14)I've learned the more you bully your children in your beliefs the more they'll do it. Your just asking for it. Parents need to be creative. Either way,good luck :)
sheramom4
by Ruby Member on May. 4, 2013 at 2:55 PM

I did the same thing to my 11 1/2 year old a couple of weeks ago. She is allowed lip gloss and eyebrow pencil (half of one eyebrow has no pigment and she was being teased about it) but was constantly putting on other things. Mostly taking them from my makeup and my oldest DD's makeup (she is 14 1/2). I threw out everything but her eyebrow pencil and she will not be getting anymore lip gloss or anything until she can prove that she will not try to wear a face full.

RaynesMommy07
by Ruby Member on May. 4, 2013 at 2:57 PM
Don't blame you. She has to learn.
Anonymous
by Anonymous 12 on May. 4, 2013 at 2:57 PM
6 moms liked this

Yeah, your co-worker is clueless. I went to school with a girl who's parents practically owned the town they were so rich. Her name was Mercedes. Her sisters name was Ruby. The family easily pulled in at least a million dollars each year between businesses and investments.

Believe it or not, sometimes there are actually traditions and meanings behind names. Even the "out there" ones.

Coming from a Latin family, my grandmother says Tiara was once a popular Latin name when she was a child. While the name's actual meaning is a crown, it was used in reference of the belief that the child would become something very special one day.

Quoting Anonymous:

Reminds me of what my co-worker says.. poor people always name thier kids expensive things theu cant afford, like Diamond, Mercadies (sp?)

Quoting Anonymous:

you named your child after a piece of royal jewelry?


Anonymous
by Anonymous 8 on May. 4, 2013 at 2:58 PM
Maybe if she taught her daughter what was right and wrong when wearing makeup then maybe she wouldn't lie about it. I still do not see what the big deal is with her wearing makeup.

Quoting Anonymous:

i dont think the point of this post is about whether or not she should wear make up. Its that her daughter is not listening to what her mother tells her, is lying and being sneaky. Doesnt matter what its about, shes being disrespectful. 

Quoting Anonymous:

Poor kid....I don't see the problem with her wearing it. Maybe you should teach her what looks good and what doesn't.


I.heart.my.kids
by on May. 4, 2013 at 2:58 PM

my daughter is going to be 4 her name is Emily... and she LOVES LOVES LOVES makeup.... all colors all kinds.... she loves to go through my aunts avon catalogs and "pick" out what she is going to get. I dont wear makeup unless its a real occasion so she doesnt have any to get into per say.... BUT she does improvise... she uses markers, once used food coloring.... she wants to dye her hair pink (ever since she seen a neighborhood girl with purple hair)..... shes gonna be one to tangle with.... 

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