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SIDS (cry fest ahead)

Posted by Anonymous   + Show Post

a poem that my old high school friend wrote on facebook. her beautiful daughter passed away from SIDS back in January. It is so painful to see her fb and the pics and poems she writes. I still dont understand SIDS and how we dont know why this happens

Memories of you remain crystal clear in my foggy brain; But your the furthest one away from me; In the physical at least
I can see you clear as day, shining, as my worst nightmare comes true; Your the only light there is; Other than you, im darkness
Your memory can never fade, not even a little; for You, is all i care to remember; The rest doesnt mean a thing
Life has taken a loss, the world is forever changed; It was not ready for your presence; Because you were perfection
Too good to live this life of heartache and pain; And still, selfishly, if it meant that you were her with me again; I would take you with me on my journey
Protection, babies need protection; Primarily from their mother or caretaker; And i could not protect you
And you were taken from me; At no more than 10 pounds; And all I could do was stand there, helpless
Looking into the forever closed eyes of my beautiful daughter; Cradling my lifeless baby; Hoping that i would eventually wake up to the comfort of your cry
And i will still wait for that moment forever; Knowing that it will never come; But i will never give up hope
Watching your 2 foot 6 inch casket be dropped down into the cold ground on January 7th 2013; Caused a pain that i didnt even know a person had the ability to feel; A pain that i didnt even know existed 
And i dont wish that type of pain on the Devil himself; December 31st 2012 was the worst day ever created, hands down; And i could have preserved your life
And as your mother, Xxxxx Xxxxx, I am eternally sorry to you; I made a bad decision as your mother that day; And that decision now leaves me in darkness and alone, without you, my baby
And i truly dont know where you are; And i think that is one of the hardest things to deal with; Your too little to send me a sign that your OK
So I can only hope that heaven exists and that you made it there safe and sound;
To continue to be the angel that you already were; And if your there, I hope you recognize me when we meet again
You were only here for 58 days; I don’t know how much you will remember; 
I just hope you remember who I am and how in love with you I was, anyone will tell you
Obsessed, I was obsessed with You; You just amazed me every second of every day;
You were undefeated in staring contests but it was so much fun trying to beat you
And when I was pregnant, all I kept saying was; I just cant wait to meet my daughter for the first time; And then there you were, on Xxxxxxx, 2012 at 2:48 am weighing in at 7 lbs 3 oz, 21 inches long 
And I couldn’t believe it; I couldn’t get over how beautiful you were; And how you just stared into my eyes for what seemed like forever
And now you are gone and there is no guarantee that I will ever see you again; 
And it is terrifying; Terrifying to think that you are by yourself right now or surrounded by strangers
And I cant come and get you, rescue you; Or kiss you' Or ever have the chance to hear you call me mommy
My hands shake right now as I write this; And the tears are always uncontrollable when it comes to you; I would give my life in a heartbeat with no hesitation if it meant I could be with you again
And believe that; Because I wouldn’t even have to think twice; thats how much I genuinely miss you and I love you always

Posted by Anonymous on May. 7, 2013 at 2:12 PM
Replies (71-72):
by Anonymous 1 - Original Poster on May. 9, 2013 at 12:36 PM

thank you. We were super close in high school (10 years ago) and kept in touch all these years on fb. I leave her a post on her wall on FB once a week letting her know im thinking of her but she never writes back to anyone. I will just stop by her house over the summer. She isn't doing very well at all 

Quoting Vamp:

wow..I'm so sorry for your freind's loss, can't begin to imagine the feeling.

are you close to her? she needs all the friends she can use right now.

by Anonymous 15 on May. 9, 2013 at 12:38 PM

but it was posted by the mother.   hopefully she doesn't mind you posting this without her permission.   and fyi   it doesn't matter if its a public or private network. 

Quoting Anonymous:

how about you mind your damn business. this was posted on a social network that isnt private. ugh go away

Quoting Anonymous:

Hey, you're the one who posted something personal that doesn't belong to you.

Quoting Anonymous:


Quoting Anonymous:

So this isn't yours to post? I wonder how your friend would feel about that.

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