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Mom Confessions Mom Confessions

Should Mother's Day Be Cancelled?

Posted by on May. 10, 2013 at 9:41 AM
  • 207 Replies
1 mom liked this

Should Mother's Day Be Cancelled?

by Jeanne Sager 

mother's dayMother's Day is back, and it's bigger than ever. Americans are expected to spend between $17.1 billion and $20.7 billion on mom this year. It's pretty clear America loves mom and Mother's Day. Or do we?

This year there's been a backlash like never before against the decades-old holiday. Turning the second Sunday in May into a day for moms has been called out as everything from insensitive to non-parents to torture for folks with absent moms.

Could it be true? Could the day Anna Jarvis created more than a hundred years ago to pay tribute to moms be outdated and cruel?

Maybe not, but a look at the feelings on both sides certainly paint a new picture of Mother's Day.

As writer Anne LaMott, author of Operating Instructions, one of the seminal works on single parenting, opined in Salon this week, Mother's Day puts moms on a pedestal ... sometimes undeservedly so:

Mother’s Day celebrates a huge lie about the value of women: that mothers are superior beings, that they have done more with their lives and chosen a more difficult path. Ha! Every woman’s path is difficult, and many mothers were as equipped to raise children as wire monkey mothers.

For one blogger right here on The Stir, even being a mother doesn't make Mother's Day a happy day. She's found that a strained relationship with her mother makes for a rough time up until the last holiday commercial plays on television:

In the way that single people dread Valentine's Day, those of us with absent mothers dread the first few weeks of May. We prepare for the onslaught of mush and gush by steeling our hearts. I didn't grow up in one of those homes you see on the commercials. My mother was cold. Is cold. She's mean and manipulative. She's a raging narcissist. She doesn't need a Mother's Day to feel special. She has every day to make life about herself.

Harsh, huh?

But it isn't all bad, moms.

As folks across the web have mentioned in recent days, Mother's Day is a happy one for hundreds of thousands of folks -- be it moms who are celebrating their own children or daughters and sons honoring the woman who brought them in this world.

For Laura Rossi Totten, the day isn't about her at all but about her kids. The blogger shared a letter to her kids on the Huffington Post this week the spun Mother's Day in another direction:

Since I don't want to spend the day repeating myself (I do that the other 364 days of the year!), next Sunday, I will silently celebrate each of the 365 gifts you have given me since last Mother's Day. My heart overflows with love when I think about all the things you two have given me!

And as Meredith Gordon points out on Mom.me, mothers tend to spend all year long planning out activities for their families. Is giving them one day to take it easy so bad?

If her family were the "Love Boat," mom would be Julie McCoy, the cruise director who keeps everyone on track. But Mother’s Day is the one of the few days when mom is supposed to surrender her cruise director responsibilities and let someone else, usually dad, steer the ship.

Who can argue with that?

Whatever side people are coming down on, one thing's clear: Mother's Day is a big holiday. Some 92 percent of Americans say they'll be celebrating.

How about you? Do you love Mother's Day or hate it?

by on May. 10, 2013 at 9:41 AM
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Replies (1-10):
iamcafemom83
by Ruby Member on May. 10, 2013 at 9:45 AM
2 moms liked this
Honestly I've never noticed the "backlash". We don't care for st. Patty's day and various other days during the year, so we just let them pass by. Valentines day is another one.
I have a feeling that people who don't particularly care for a certain Hallmark holiday do the same.
I enjoy spending the day with my mom, grandmother, aunts and kids. We exchange cards and visit, it's nice.
phoebe81
by Silver Member on May. 10, 2013 at 9:49 AM
70 moms liked this

I don't see why it's so hard for people to just choose not to celebrate it. I also don't understand why our culture seems to believe that if it doesn't include EVERYONE, it shouldn't include ANYONE. My mom died a few years ago, none of us should celebrate Mother's Day because it makes me sad! Oh, you have a great mom and are excited about Mother's Day?! Well my mom is gone, pay attention to me and my woe and don't you dare shove Mother's Day in my face!

I mean, honestly. It's ridiculous. If you don't like it, don't celebrate it but to suggest canceling it is just another symptom of the entitlment disease this generation suffers from.

mommytoeandb
by Platinum Member on May. 10, 2013 at 9:49 AM
6 moms liked this

Mother's Day (and Father's Day/Grandparent's Day/every other apprecition day) is a reminder to appreciate those in our lives that impact us on a regular basis.  It does not have to be a commercial holiday nor is anyone required to participate.  I send my mom and grandmother cards to let them know I am thinking of them.  We don't do big gifts for mother's day.  It is about the kids doing cute stuff for parents.  :) 

MorganTho
by Silver Member on May. 10, 2013 at 9:52 AM
7 moms liked this
My sister used to get my Dad a cake on mothers day since he raised her as a single dad. I think people just take things so personal when they can opt out of not celebrating.
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ajdahd13
by on May. 10, 2013 at 10:07 AM
8 moms liked this

This is ridiculous!! Everything offends someone. I will continue to celebrate my mother, and my husband and kids will continue to celebrate me. 

PinkButterfly66
by Emerald Member on May. 10, 2013 at 10:10 AM
1 mom liked this

I hate mother's day.  I'd be perfectly fine if it were cancelled.

wickedfiress
by Platinum Member on May. 10, 2013 at 10:13 AM
26 moms liked this
NFL should be cancelled because I suck at football, and that makes me sad, very very sad. Whaaaaaaaa!
Anonymous
by Anonymous 1 on May. 10, 2013 at 10:19 AM
9 moms liked this

Ok, but let's also cancel presidents day we only have had 44 of them, no reason to make a big deal out of that small number compared to the billions of mothers. Let's also do away with Labor day, the unemployment rate is too high and we are only hurting those who don't work by celebrating those who do. 

Sweetest day can also join the group in the bottom of the trash can, after all it hurts the feelings of all of us who are no longer the sweety and just the housewife taken for granted. 

And ugh let's not forget Halloween, how dare they have a holiday geared towards children where the adults are frowned upon if they want to dress up and get their own candy. 

SpiritedWitch
by Froggie on May. 10, 2013 at 10:19 AM

I think it is sad that some people only appreciate their mom's two days a year ... mom's b-day and mother's day. What about the other 363 days of the year? Isn't mom appreciated those days? 

I don't hate or love mother's day. It's hard this year b/c MIL just passed away in March and we only have my mom left. 

danie24
by Ruby Member on May. 10, 2013 at 10:25 AM
4 moms liked this

People are sad.

And so stupid.

The wonderful thing about living in a free country is how you can celebrate whatever the hell you want.. or not.

If you don't want to celebreate your Mom or any Mom.. don't.

If you don't want to celebrate the fairy tale resurrection of a dead man.. don't.

If you don't want to celebrate the birth of your child or your best friend your yourself.. don't.


But if you do.. great!

Don't people realize they can do what they want without forcing others to do the same? LOL

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