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Mom Confessions Mom Confessions

I think this is it. I can't do this anymore.

Anonymous
Posted by Anonymous
  • 35 Replies

Yes, I am posting Anon. The thing is, I can't take this relationship with SO anymore. We have been together 2 1/2 years and I just can't deal. He is bipolar and he self adjusts his medication to the point where it is no longer therapuetic and it turns toxic. At this point, I can't seperate the man from the disease. Thursday, I was at work, and he snooped through my things. He found a post I had written in another group here for bipolar spouses and I guess he didn't like what I have to say. I am not allowed to vent my frustrations to anyone IRL, not him, not friends, not family. Not even a journal because he will find it and read it and then start a fight. I was just looking for support. Sure enough, he starts a fight while I am at work, and just from how he was talking, I knew it was going to be bad. So, I rushed home, since he was taking care of the girls, and of course, it escalated to him making like he was gonna punch me. NOT OK!!!! I called the police, even though he didn't hit me. I chose not to let it slide. He has been in jail this whole time, and the VA here is looking to transfer him to an inpatient facility and readjust him, but I just don't think I can do it. We were supposed to get married, but he was such a dick about it, I busted him down to boyfriend until he could get his head straight. Now, I don't ever want to marry him. And that, to me, signals the end of the relationship. I have become so numb. I can't even think fondly of him anymore.

Seriously, what kind of asshole goes through their girldriend's shit while she is at work to provide an additional income to the family to find something to be mad about? I have NO privacy. NONE. And yet, he insists on complete privacy for himself. He is not cheating on me. He is constantly up my butt, but still...... I think this is it. I love him, but I can't be with him. 

Posted by Anonymous on May. 13, 2013 at 9:24 AM
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Replies (1-10):
CorpCityGrl
by Platinum Member on May. 13, 2013 at 9:26 AM
5 moms liked this

It sounds like you've made the decision already.  If it's what's best for you and your family, then so be it.  You cannot help someone who isn't willing to help themselves.

Anonymous
by Anonymous on May. 13, 2013 at 9:26 AM

Split then.

Gabeys_Mommy
by Bronze Member on May. 13, 2013 at 9:28 AM
Wow, that sounds like it would be hard. I would definitely leave before you get any deeper.
Anonymous
by Anonymous - Original Poster on May. 13, 2013 at 9:30 AM
1 mom liked this

I am. I have already started to seperate everything, which isn't that hard. I have all the utilities in my name, a good job that I make a good living at, and my own bank account and cell phone. When I busted him back down to boyfriend, I started seperating our lives because I was tired of him using those things in arguments, like canceling my cell service and whatnot. I figured, since I was no longer his fiance, we no longer needed to prepare for a life together. All perks of spousehood stopped. I just had to say it to someone. 


Quoting Anonymous:

Split then.



Anonymous
by Anonymous - Original Poster on May. 13, 2013 at 9:32 AM


Oh, sugar. I am already as deep as one can be without a marriage certificate. That includes children. But, the fact is, while he is an amazing father, he SUCKS as a partner. He has had plenty of time to get his shit together, so I cannot write it off as bipolar anymore. I have to face facts that he is just a dick.

Quoting Gabeys_Mommy:

Wow, that sounds like it would be hard. I would definitely leave before you get any deeper.



Gabeys_Mommy
by Bronze Member on May. 13, 2013 at 9:34 AM
I'm sorry, mama. Better to get out now before you get married. Hope everything works out.


Quoting Anonymous:


Oh, sugar. I am already as deep as one can be without a marriage certificate. That includes children. But, the fact is, while he is an amazing father, he SUCKS as a partner. He has had plenty of time to get his shit together, so I cannot write it off as bipolar anymore. I have to face facts that he is just a dick.


Quoting Gabeys_Mommy:

Wow, that sounds like it would be hard. I would definitely leave before you get any deeper.





Cmgmqmmom
by Sass Queen on May. 13, 2013 at 9:34 AM
You need to do what is right for you and your children. It's unfortunate that his disease is coming between you, but that's not your (or his) fault. Good luck!
Anonymous
by Anonymous - Original Poster on May. 13, 2013 at 9:37 AM

Thank you. I loved him, SO MUCH. Like, life changing, OMG so this is what this is supposed to feel like Loved. But, I can't let this go anymore. I have done all I can do. He has refused to move forward or counseling or anything and I can't let him hurt me anymore. I can't let him teach my kids that this is love. It isn't. When he is good, we are GREAT, but, those time no longer come. And I can't wait any longer. 


Quoting Gabeys_Mommy:

I'm sorry, mama. Better to get out now before you get married. Hope everything works out.


Quoting Anonymous:


Oh, sugar. I am already as deep as one can be without a marriage certificate. That includes children. But, the fact is, while he is an amazing father, he SUCKS as a partner. He has had plenty of time to get his shit together, so I cannot write it off as bipolar anymore. I have to face facts that he is just a dick.


Quoting Gabeys_Mommy:

Wow, that sounds like it would be hard. I would definitely leave before you get any deeper.







Anonymous
by Anonymous - Original Poster on May. 13, 2013 at 9:39 AM

I know alot of it ISN"T his fault. But his choice to not work harder at his therapy IS. His choice to self adjust his medicine IS. And his choice to go through my things IS. I wish it was different. I loved him.


Quoting Cmgmqmmom:

You need to do what is right for you and your children. It's unfortunate that his disease is coming between you, but that's not your (or his) fault. Good luck!



MrsDavidB25
by Stacey on May. 13, 2013 at 9:40 AM

 I would be OUT!

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