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Moms with SO/DHs with kids from previous relationships.....

Posted by on May. 18, 2013 at 4:33 AM
  • 26 Replies

 

Poll

Question: Do you expect him to reduce his support to his previous children?

Options:

Yes, our baby is more important IMO.

No, both families are just as important.

Never had this situation, but if I did, I would expect him to.

Never had this situation, but if I did, I would NOT expect him to.

Other, because there always is.


Only group members can vote in this poll.

Total Votes: 20

View Results

I've seen so many posts about women that expect their SO/DHs with previous kids to reduce/stop paying child support just because they're having kids with them. Why???????? I don't understand it. I'm an ex wife. I was a single mom for 6 years, starting out with a 4 and 1 yr old. I depended on the child support I got from my ex to help pay for things my checks wouldn't cover (ie extra clothes, shoes, things like that). When he got married (20 days after our divorce was finalized to be exact), I didn't worry much. When they started having kids, not a big deal. I don't know if she ever wanted him to reduce his support, but I highly doubt it. Now I'm in the opposite position. I'm the girlfriend of a guy with a kid from a previous marriage. I'm due to have a baby very soon. Do I expect him to reduce his payments? Hell to the no!!!!!! His previous DD is just as important as ours and she needs and DESERVES the money he sends to her! Once, he came up short after paying his share of the bills (one was a huuuuge hospital bill for a biopsy we had to get done on his ankle), so I actually GAVE HIM the money to send to his ex wife. She doesn't believe it since she hates me, but yeah. It's important to these kids. So how about it ladies? Do you expect your SO/DH to reduce his support to his previous children? If so, why? Poll added, please vote and comment.
by on May. 18, 2013 at 4:33 AM
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Replies (1-10):
Anonymous
by Anonymous on May. 18, 2013 at 4:37 AM

Don't have this issue, but I would never marry a man who can not keep his finachial responsibility towards all of his kids. They were there before me. 

mama-sita
by on May. 18, 2013 at 4:37 AM

BUMP!

Ashley_Carlson
by on May. 18, 2013 at 4:39 AM

BF never had to pay child support for either of his two kids. (long story that I don't think he'd appreciate me telling here)

dawnnamarie
by Ruby Member on May. 18, 2013 at 4:40 AM
No experience.... Dh paid his cs for ss the same before dd and I came into the picture as he did afterwArds. Even when I was still in college and money was tight, I didn't complain.

Now he is custodial parent, and we don't get a dime from bm.
Anonymous
by Anonymous on May. 18, 2013 at 4:40 AM
I was in your shoes my ex had a DD and he paid child support and if anything I pushed him to pay I loved that little girl and she was just as important to me as she was to him
PurplePieguy
by Silver Member on May. 18, 2013 at 4:42 AM

My ex has a total of 6 kids. Mine being the older 4. However, if mine were the younger ones I wouldn't expect him to reduce it just because I was having a child with him. 

mama-sita
by on May. 18, 2013 at 4:47 AM

BUMP!

Anonymous
by Anonymous on May. 18, 2013 at 4:48 AM

Yes, I think they should but not because my child is more important but because all the children are just as important and all should be supported equally. It isn't the child's fault that their father had a child before them so they should be entitled to just as much financial support as any previous children.

mama-sita
by on May. 18, 2013 at 4:51 AM

So you think the child born before them, who doesn't have full access to their father, should have to cut back on the financial support he or she gets?  Just because he/she had the misfortune of parents splitting up?


Quoting Anonymous:

Yes, I think they should but not because my child is more important but because all the children are just as important and all should be supported equally. It isn't the child's fault that their father had a child before them so they should be entitled to just as much financial support as any previous children.



mama-sita
by on May. 18, 2013 at 4:56 AM

BUMP!

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