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who decides dinner?

Posted by Anonymous   + Show Post
I'm a SAHM to three and expecting our 4th in approx 5 weeks. My dh works long hours outdoors so I get that he's exhausted and wants dinner on the table when he gets home. I TRY to do this for him however, he doesn't work a set schedule so he doesn't come home at the same time every evening...though I usually aim for about 5pm. I usually plan and have dinner made or get it delivered by this time every weeknight but on the weekends I EXPECT his input. He doesn't work weekends and he usually has his own opinions about what he wants or doesn't want.
Am I supposed to plan, cook, serve and clean up EVERY NIGHT?
Posted by Anonymous on May. 19, 2013 at 3:55 PM
Replies (31-40):
MommyLehr
by Veronica on May. 19, 2013 at 5:17 PM
Lucky!! My husband cooks once every few months and then expects me to clean up. And when I cook I still have to clean up! :-(

Quoting sadiebug1228:

In our house. Whoever cooks doesn't have to clean. Although I pitch in anyway lol my df isn't picky about food. Usually I have it ready when he gets home but sometimes I wait and ask him to help cook since I help clean
Anonymous
by Anonymous on May. 19, 2013 at 5:20 PM
I do. I ask him what he wants sometimes, I always get "I'm not picky". A little annoying lol. There has to be days that he has a preferance, right?
Wyndi
by on May. 19, 2013 at 5:23 PM

 Try running two households. One of them from out of state. At my house the rule is if you cook, you don't clean. However, at my Dad's house you cook and clean up. At Dad's house I'm dealing with an Alzheimer (grandma) and a stroke patient (dad) when he is released in two weeks from rehab.

At my house, my daughter will text me on how to fix a certain cut of meat ~ say stew meat. I give three options and how to fix them. They all give her imput on what they want to eat or they know not to complain about what is fixed and to eat it. She has told DH that she wants ribs and that is his job to fix ~ her way to get someone else to cook for her.

Before the bash fest begins my children are 18 and 20 yrs old. I am the most logical choice to come down and care for my father and grandmother because my children are adults and don't depend on me to change diapers like my sil deals with.

Anonymous
by Anonymous - Original Poster on May. 19, 2013 at 5:56 PM
We have mostly quick meals for dinner. I enjoy making food that everyone eats but alas I have a picky family and am not a one woman restaurant ...it's gotten easier lately because the youngest will eat almost anything and my oldest will eat anything but beef. We always fight over our middle though because he is super picky and autistic so I worry about just letting him "get hungry". His therapist said to just include SOMETHING that I know he'll eat every night so I usually ask him if he wants noodles or mashed potatoes and then we always have fruit for "dessert". We supplement with vitamins and pedia sure too, just to make sure.


Quoting 1L2CMommy:

I'm a SAHM, DH works 4, 10 hour, third shifts a week, plus usually overtime.  I plan cook, serve and clean up every meal.  On his days off I may tell him what I am thinking about making, and if he suggests something else, we'll have what he wants.  He never "expects" me to do anything.  I enjoy doing it for him, and our family.  I kinda figured it was part of my job description as a wife and mother, and having the time to do it that he doesn't.  I can't imagine how tired you are chasing 3, and pregnant.  We have 2 toddlers, and they are kicking my butt.  Maybe you could try some simple, easy meals until after the baby is born.  I use my crock 2-3 times a week, more if I'm feeling lazy, something sounds good, or I am busy.  It's a lifesaver.  I even saw a recipe for baked potatoes in the crock!

Beautiful31mom
by on May. 19, 2013 at 5:57 PM

we meal plan and everyone has a hand in it.

ImNotKarl
by Also Not Paul on May. 19, 2013 at 5:58 PM

We agree on dinner.

Anonymous
by Anonymous - Original Poster on May. 19, 2013 at 5:59 PM
I get annoyed when he says "just feed the kids" because this usually means that I'll have two dinners to have to clean up afterward.

Quoting Anonymous:

I do. I ask him what he wants sometimes, I always get "I'm not picky". A little annoying lol. There has to be days that he has a preferance, right?
aandt1999
by Platinum Member on May. 19, 2013 at 5:59 PM

Whoever is cooking that night. Tonight my hubby is cooking so he picked dirty rice. He does that better than I do anyway. 

12345abcde54321
by Platinum Member on May. 19, 2013 at 6:00 PM

i do.. it's just how we do things. he cooks once a month or less usually, more if i'm not home for some reason. he wouldn't demand that it is on the table for him. sometimes we eat without him if my schedule requires it, or if he comes home starving and it's not ready he'll grab a snack.

CoastieWifey83
by Silver Member on May. 19, 2013 at 6:00 PM
I do. Always. When I ask dh what he wants, he always says anything. So I decide when and what we eat. If I don't cook, dh just grabs cereal. I'm lucky he's so cool about it. He tells me not to stress too much and I don't have to cook big meals daily.
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