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I'm starting to hate my son.... bash if you must idk at this point edit

Anonymous
Posted by Anonymous
  • 382 Replies
2 moms liked this

I'm so sick of his behavior. he seems to only do stupid sit during school hours. I can't stand picking him up anymore in the afternoon because I know that I'm the mom the whole class hates. I'm the mom that takes up the teachers time to explain what happened that day causing her to ignore them to send their children out. I hate having to constantly come up with incentives to keep him good, because frankly its a daily process and its exhausting. I'm tired of ignoring my other two children, who are not horrible. one of which has not had a single mark and the other had one for not getting get agenda signed.

today he gets in trouble for sticking his butt in someone's face. like while they were standing in line he bent over, put his butt up next to her and made a fart sound. are you kidding me?? mind you he hasn't watched any tv, played any games, played with any toys, nothing for months. he does get to go outside and play but no toys, trampoline, bikes, scooters nothing. I've stripped his bedroom down to pain clothing, one dresser, his bed and bedding. nothing else. I am at a loss here. I'm so pissed.

at school our newest incentive send to be taking away markets for the first offence, taking recess away for offense two and emailing me to go visit him during offense three. any thereafter are immediately sent to the principal.

sometimes his behavior varies from silly things to moderate behavior and some serious ones like rolling around on the floor, not following directions, stepping on others fingers, breaking pencils and crayons, talking, running indoors, playing, back talking, being rude, stabbing other with plastic utensils, running away from the teacher during recess, calling the teacher a variety of names ect.

btw he is seven in first grade. these problems were not an issue in kindergarten. just this year.

I feel like a horrible parent. like I've failed him and I can't make things better. I hate this feeling and honestly wish my living, caring sweet little boy were back. I don't know where I've failed:(

bash if you must.... but know that you can't treat me down any lower than I am now

 

EDIT
So i had no idea that this post was going to turn out like this and i just want to say thanks. i could have sworn when i vented on here that i would have been bashed to hell but thankfully i wasn't. I think that I am going to talk to his dad tonight to see about maybe getting him tested to see what they think is going on with him without using medication. i am right now as i type this looking into natural methods to deal with children that may have adhd/add. i don't think that this is an autism/asburgers this but then again i am just a mom and i don't really know. his dad is also really against medication but at the point that we are at...maybe it should be considered.

That being said I WILL NOT spank my child. if you read the behavior problems that he is having you can clearly see that he is starting to get downright mean....by stepping on others fingers and using the utensil to injure students. while i am told that he didn't break the skin on that child i think that he should have gotten a harsher punishment. i think that the school is letting me deal with things that he does so early in the day and that is complete bullshit. I from here on out will not be handling anything he does at school. i think that by punishing him isn't doing anything but creating havoc on our relationship and distancing him from me. that isn't fair to him. as of today he will have all his things back and his slate will be clean. the only time i will discipline him is for things he might do at home. however, he usually doesn't get in trouble then. one thing that i will mention is that i don't allow my children to watch television during the school week. we are so busy with sports after school and homework that it leaves us with no time.

I am at my breaking point with him and i think that if i can get his dad to agree to let me test him it would help out tremendously. i can't guarantee anything but given the fact that i am going to look into natural methods and diet changes it might help. I will not be giving him medication.

 BTW i emailed his teacher and asked what exactly she did for his punishment. she "took his markers (for the first strike) moved his clip(from green to yellow) and took half of his recess away! that is what she did for his behavior yesterday of sticking his behind in another students face

again thank you ladies soooo much for all the support that you have given me and a lot of information that i honestly took from it.

Posted by Anonymous on May. 22, 2013 at 4:54 PM
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Replies (1-10):
TheDoctorsWife
by on May. 22, 2013 at 4:56 PM
15 moms liked this

 ADHD? sounds like he's bored

 

937mrsweaver
by Silver Member on May. 22, 2013 at 4:56 PM
7 moms liked this

hate is a pretty strong word.. think about  that

bump?

ConcernedCousin
by Silver Member on May. 22, 2013 at 4:57 PM
3 moms liked this

how old is he? if he only does it at school, could it be possible he is just bored? you know like how the smart kids get bored in class when they aren't challenged. or maybe something else is going on at school you don't know about that is making him act up? i have no real advice as i haven't dealt with that but i hope you can figure something out, and no bashing here

allornone
by Silver Member on May. 22, 2013 at 4:58 PM
1 mom liked this

Where is dad? Have you talked to your doctor?

I would end up showing up at the least expected time and sit with him during school.  Can you be more involved in his classroom? Maybe it's the teacher? When does school get out? He could be bored.

shyone_91786
by Silver Member on May. 22, 2013 at 4:59 PM
2 moms liked this

If I didn't know any better i would swear you were my sister she went through this with her son he was the only kindergartner I knew that got expelled. but she had him diagnosed I forgot with what. Have you tryed talking with your dr and having him tested. sorry you are going through this I hate my son sometimes he is three but i think he knows that when we are out i can't really spank him so he will act up and I just want to throw him through a wall sometimes lol. but good luck

HappyMorgana
by on May. 22, 2013 at 5:00 PM
3 moms liked this

It's YOUR CHILD and if this isn't working you do NOT bang your head against the same wall over and over expecting to get a different result. That's the definition of insanity, doing the same thing over and over and over and always getting the same result but expecting a different one. He obviously needs HELP. By that I mean an evaluation by a therapist. It sucks but some kids need it. He does obviously.

paintitblack0
by Silver Member on May. 22, 2013 at 5:01 PM

Something is troubling him. Acting out for attention is my guess. Did someone die? How is your Relationship with his father? OR how was Kindergarten for him? Pleasant?


Bashing is not helping. 

afwifeandmommy3
by on May. 22, 2013 at 5:03 PM
2 moms liked this
ADHD hello ! Get him to a psychiatrist and medicated
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spunky946
by Ruby Member on May. 22, 2013 at 5:03 PM
1 mom liked this
I'd talk to his doctor to see if you should get him tested. P
Roo1234
by Gold Member on May. 22, 2013 at 5:04 PM
32 moms liked this

There is great pleasure to be found in being the class clown.  My son attempted it this year.  

The first time he did it he returned the next day and had to publically apologize to the teacher and the entire class for being disruptive.  We also outlined that there is a time and a place for silly behaviors and a time to have restraint.

By the next parent-teacher conference I was told that he was using his "leadership abilities in a postive way" by being a role model for the class.  He was "by far, one of the most responsible students in the class"

I think that there are a couple of things you need to consider:  1) make him take real ownership of his choices and have to look everyone in the eye and apologize and 2) help him to find positive outlets for his energies.  If he wants to "act up" get him into a performance group (dance, theatre, clown school, etc.).  Lastly, start focusing more on the things he does right so that he gets more positive attention for positive things.  Praise his good choices and encourage him to continue to act in that way.

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