Join the Meeting Place for Moms!
Talk to other moms, share advice, and have fun!

(minimum 6 characters)

Mom Confessions Mom Confessions

FIL was arrested for assaulting me

Anonymous
Posted by Anonymous
  • 516 Replies
2 moms liked this

 

Poll

Question: If you were a member of DH's family, whose side would you take?

Options:

Yours, FIL was wrong to hit you and deserves whatever he gets

FIL's. It's family, you don't press charges against family

Other


Only group members can vote in this poll.

Total Votes: 707

View Results

Here is what happened. SIL had her birthday party last Friday.  DH was working and wouldn't get there till 8, it started at 7 so me and the kids went on time and he was going to meet us there.

We had plans to go to the Zoo on Saturday with the kids. DH said that his dad has trying to get him to go fishing with him for a while but there has always been something going on. But he promised me he would tell his dad about our plans if he asked him to go on Saturday.

Anyway, me and the kids got there and we all had a good time. FIL came up to me and said,"I am going to take Mike (DH) fishing tomorrow, I am not taking no for an answer". Since we already had plans I said "does he know about this" he said "no, it's a surprise, we haven't been in a long time" I said "well, we already have plans to take the kids to the zoo tomorrow". FIL looked at me and said "you know you aren't his only family,you are always taken up all his time. I am his father and was in his life way before you" I responded, "I know that but me and out kids are his immediate family now so yes, he does more with us. Tomorrow, we have plans".

I moved to pick up the baby, who had been playing on the floor next to me and planned to walk away after I did. I didn't want there to be a big blowout at SIL's birthday party. But before I could do so, FIL  smacked me in the face and walked away. Since I wasn't looking at him, I didn't see it coming, I fell back and hit my head on a nearby table (thank God I hadn't picked up the baby yet). My head was bleeding and SIL got me a towel. 

Just ask everyone realized what happened, DH walked in. I told him what happened. He saw it and said it looked like it needed stitches (DH is a nurse). MIL tried to say I would be fine (no doubt she didn't want me going to the ER and possibly getting the cops involved.) On our way out, she kept saying "are you going to get the police involved, that would be really mean of you" not even asking if I was ok or if she could do anything. DH was so mad and was looking for his dad, but he wasn't anywhere to be found and FIL's car was gone. We called my mom from the car to ask if she could babysit the kids while we went to the hospital.

I got to the ER and they checked me out. I needed 4 stitches and I had a concussion there was also a mark where FIL smacked me. The doctor asked what happened, looking suspiciously at DH. I told him and the cops where called in and they asked if I wanted to press charges. I did. DH 100% supported me in this.

FIL was found and arrested that night. He spent the weekend in jail and MIL bailed him out Monday.

MIL called DH asking him to get me to drop the charges and DH told her that he supports me and that FIL deserves whatever he gets. MIL said that FIL will lose his job (he works security) if I don't drop the charges. DH told her that's his problem. MIL was also surprised to find out that her and FIL are no longer invited to our cook out this weekend.

Now there are actually members of DH's family who are mad at US! FIL hit me, caused me to need stitches and have a concussion, didn't even stop to see if I was ok before he left and I am the bad guy? MIL isn't innocent either, she tried to tell me I didn't need medical attention just to prevent her DH from possibly getting in trouble. What kind of person does that.FIL's sister called to tell me that no matter what, this is family and you don't do this to family. FIL can't take back what he did to me but I can drop the charges.

I am really hurt that some of the family is acting like this. Thankfully not all of them are.

Posted by Anonymous on May. 23, 2013 at 11:04 AM
Add your quick reply below:
You must be a member to reply to this post.
Replies (1-10):
Anonymous
by Anonymous - Original Poster on May. 23, 2013 at 11:06 AM

BUMP!

Coconutty4Hubby
by Cafe Goddess on May. 23, 2013 at 11:06 AM
5 moms liked this

bump

(EDIT: OK, I understand most of you do not agree with me. But, until OP shows a picture of this 'beating' I will 100% stand by what I said. Stop quoting me because I will not respond back until OP shows a picture. If and when she shows a picture, then I will change my opinion.  But, until then, I do not think it's as bad as OP blew it up to be. A man does not just hit his DIL (who has been in the family for 10 years) at a party because she said no his DS can not go out fishing with him, unless he's getting Alzheimer's...)

I do NOT approve of this, not at all. You were in the wrong first.  To go fishing, is EARLY in the morning. You can't go to the zoo in the afternoon?

Can I have your FIL? Because MINE IS DEAD and I would love to go fishing with him and bond and spend quality time with him. 

You act like you are the law. I feel sorry for your DH. He doesn't know what he's in for for the rest of his life, you turning his whole family against you because you don't want to share or have fun.

WHY COULDN'T YOU SUGGEST DH GO WITH FIL AND MIL GOES WITH YOU AND YOUR LO's?

I just don't get why women act like you. It's disgusting.

Oh, I do not approve of FIL or any man hitting a woman, so he was WRONG (stop quoting me bashing me because I clearly stated here he was soo wrong for this, DUDE< OP< JUST SEND ME YOUR FIL, MY DH AND I WOULD LOVE TO GO FISHING WITH A MAN WHO ACTUALLY WANTS TO SPEND FAMILY TIME WITH THEIR FAMILY), but for you to actually press charges? That is disgusting in my book. I would HATE to have you as a DIL.  I would be cutting you off if I was your MIL.  FFS, why can't you get along, are you not adults? Just not mature enough?

Anonymous
by Anonymous 2 on May. 23, 2013 at 11:08 AM
3 moms liked this

I would not press charges against family unless it happened more than once or to my children.

Anonymous
by Anonymous 3 on May. 23, 2013 at 11:09 AM
Does fil have anger problems? Has he done this before?
Anonymous
by Anonymous 4 on May. 23, 2013 at 11:09 AM
27 moms liked this

I wouldn't give a shit if I were a part of this family or not. You husband is supporting you and that is all you need. EFF everyone else. If they continue to call you or keep trying to contact you in any way get a restraining order. FIL is in the wrong, he has no right to hit you or anyone else for that matter. He deserves time in jail. If he loses his job that is his fault not yours.

BigMamaStacy
by Member on May. 23, 2013 at 11:09 AM
5 moms liked this
Good for you for pressing charges, and good for your DH for standing by you! I'd press charges too! What a POS FIL you have. Sounds like most of the family are POS's to me though. If I were DH I'd sock him next time I saw him, if I ever saw him again.
Anonymous
by Anonymous 2 on May. 23, 2013 at 11:11 AM
3 moms liked this

I would cut contact for awhile, but not press charges.  It would ruin his job and in this economy it might be hard to find another.  People do dumb idiotic things, sometimes for the benifit of the family as a whole you have to be the bigger person.  You might never forgive him, family might never be the same but the less walls put up the better.

Anonymous
by Anonymous - Original Poster on May. 23, 2013 at 11:11 AM
8 moms liked this

You are more understanding then I am I guess. If someone sends me to the emergency room (not by accident) I have no problem having them sent to jail.



Quoting Anonymous:

I would not press charges against family unless it happened more than once or to my children.



angevil53
by on May. 23, 2013 at 11:11 AM
3 moms liked this
Screw him. Idc what you said to him. It wasn't deserving of that behavior even if you weren't hurt. You're left with the repercussions of his crime. He gets what the law says he gets. My dh would've beat his ass more than likely.
PhantomRose88
by Ruby Member on May. 23, 2013 at 11:11 AM
3 moms liked this

I would cut contact, but, drop the charges

Add your quick reply below:
You must be a member to reply to this post.
Join the Meeting Place for Moms!
Talk to other moms, share advice, and have fun!

(minimum 6 characters)