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He won't get off his a**!!!

Anonymous
Posted by Anonymous
  • 26 Replies

It is official. I am married to the laziest man on the planet. He will start a project around the house, but doesn't finish it. Then he'll start ANOTHER one. We bought our house a few years ago and there are STILL unfinished projects. It's embarassing to have people over and I have tried every possible thing to motivate him. I can't take it anymore. I've even offered that if he straighten up his tool area where I could find tools that I would need, I'd look it up on YouTube and do it - but he won't even do that. I work and have barely enough time as it is, so I can't blow it digging through his crap to find what I need.

It's really starting to cause problems in our marriage. I've turned into the "nagging wife" and I don't like it. Not that it even helps anyway.

I don't know what to do.

Posted by Anonymous on May. 24, 2013 at 8:16 AM
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Replies (1-10):
teri4lance
by Ruby Member on May. 24, 2013 at 8:17 AM
Start doing a project anyway. It should be embarassing enough that you are doing it.
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Anonymous
by Anonymous 1 - Original Poster on May. 24, 2013 at 8:25 AM

 Tried that... He doesn't care. I've even offered to "have some of the guys from work come help me" figuring I'd get the jealous streak of motivation. Nope.

Maybe if I buy my own toolbox and TAKE his tools and put them in there and tell him since he doesn't use them... lol

Quoting teri4lance:

Start doing a project anyway. It should be embarassing enough that you are doing it.

 

teri4lance
by Ruby Member on May. 24, 2013 at 8:28 AM
Quit threatening and do it. So far you are all talk and no action . Do it mama!


Quoting Anonymous:

 Tried that... He doesn't care. I've even offered to "have some of the guys from work come help me" figuring I'd get the jealous streak of motivation. Nope.


Maybe if I buy my own toolbox and TAKE his tools and put them in there and tell him since he doesn't use them... lol


Quoting teri4lance:

Start doing a project anyway. It should be embarassing enough that you are doing it.

 


Posted on CafeMom Mobile
Cealleigh
by on May. 24, 2013 at 8:32 AM
I've been there! My husband is a carpenter. At one point, our kitchen remained half done, meaning one wall had no cabinets on it, for 7 years! I had to get pregnant in order for him to be motivated enough to finish it.
momto3B
by on May. 24, 2013 at 8:37 AM

Start getting estimates for what needs to be done and have the contractors come when you DH is at home. If they could look like J. Crew models, even better:)

When faced with having other men in his home, other men who he has to pay and who his wife will be oogling, it may get him to man up and finish a few projects:)

Best of luck to you.

cmeinthelite29
by on May. 24, 2013 at 8:41 AM
Ah fond memories of growing up. My father was a carpenter. He was extremely talented and made an excellent living. But at home nothing was completed. My mother and I became masters at finishing his work.

The ironic thing now, DH finishes my projects. LoL

My advice, start completing his work. I get so angry when DH does it, that I make more of an effort to finish them when I start them.
Anonymous
by Anonymous 1 - Original Poster on May. 24, 2013 at 8:43 AM

 Oh god it can go on for 7 years?!??! DH has had a vasectomy, so getting pregnant would be a bit difficult (and hard to explain without Maury) lol.

We have a ceiling messed up in the foyer. Just drywall screwed up, no filler, nothing.
We are MISSING a kitchen ceiling light (even though I bought one and it is ON THE COUNTER in the kitchen. Currently we are using a stand-up bedroom LAMP in the kitchen. Ghetto...
We are missing slats on the deck.
The dogs keep getting out - through this UN-FINISHED gate project.
Don't even get me started on the basement...

There are tons more examples...

Quoting Cealleigh:

I've been there! My husband is a carpenter. At one point, our kitchen remained half done, meaning one wall had no cabinets on it, for 7 years! I had to get pregnant in order for him to be motivated enough to finish it.

 

Anonymous
by Anonymous 1 - Original Poster on May. 24, 2013 at 8:45 AM

 That's not a bad idea! That way he loses the credit for the project - which is his main objective. To obtain the "ohhh wow! you're so awesome!" compliments lol. But if I finish it, I can steal that from him. Maybe he'll learn.

The only problem is, I don't know how to do ANY of these things. I guess it's a good time to learn. But I'm not trying electrical lol.

Quoting cmeinthelite29:

Ah fond memories of growing up. My father was a carpenter. He was extremely talented and made an excellent living. But at home nothing was completed. My mother and I became masters at finishing his work.

The ironic thing now, DH finishes my projects. LoL

My advice, start completing his work. I get so angry when DH does it, that I make more of an effort to finish them when I start them.

 

Anonymous
by Anonymous 1 - Original Poster on May. 24, 2013 at 8:48 AM

 And even if it DOESN'T work, at least I'll have a good time lol.

Unfortunately that would only happen in my dream world. I'm not home during the day, so DH would be doing the oogling. Plus I'm broke, and we first agree on any big purchases/expenses before spending money on it.

But I love the idea... I suppose I could tape pictures of these men, in their work clothes, all over the projects that need to be done. On the ceiling where the light should be, etc... Guests would find it weird - but wouldn't they find a bedroom lamp in the kitchen just as weird? lol

Quoting momto3B:

Start getting estimates for what needs to be done and have the contractors come when you DH is at home. If they could look like J. Crew models, even better:)

When faced with having other men in his home, other men who he has to pay and who his wife will be oogling, it may get him to man up and finish a few projects:)

Best of luck to you.

 

Anonymous
by Anonymous 2 on May. 24, 2013 at 8:49 AM
Hire someone to come in and finish it.

Or on your time off help him do it.
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