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Mom Confessions Mom Confessions

drugs and alcohol... refused visitation, DH wants full custody.

Anonymous
Posted by Anonymous
  • 2 Replies

for the last 2 years DH and i have been in a fight over the custody of his 6 year old DD. he has tried to be nice and show the woman some respect even if she doesn't deserve it. we have tried to meet her half way on some things, nothing has helped. she is an alcoholic, she had gotten treatment which is the only reason she is still allowed weekends with DD.

last year she got married to a man that she only knew for a few weeks, for a while she was off the booze and we thought that maybe this was it and she had finely been able to kick it all together. then we found out that she has been lying to everyone and that she is still drinking. not only that but her husband has a record for drugs, some of them as resent as last year. don't know if it was before or after they got married, but god only knows how long this has all been going on and how much DD has seen. SD hasn't mentioned anything so we were shocked when we found out about this. BM has been hiding things pretty well. always making sure that the front room was clean and that she was well put together when we would drop off SD. we really had no idea that she had been bribing the LO to not say anything! so DH is looking into seeing about getting full custody with no visitation or monitored visitation. he hates that it has to come to this but we have given her enough chances here, and the mess with her husband is the final straw.

 the thing that is even more messed up about this is that she is also now pregnant, only a few weeks and that she has admitted that she doesn't think she can stop drinking! i feel so bad for her and that poor baby inside. but there is nothing we can do, DH says that we can only save his daughter.

part of me is just feel sick about this whole thing, SD loves her mother and doesn't understand why she is the way she is. i don't know how she will take not being able to see her, but we know that she would be better off not having to be around that..  right now SD is so mad at us for telling her that she cant go to her mother's house, she misses her toys over there and her little friend next door.

WWYD... advice?! 

 

Posted by Anonymous on May. 25, 2013 at 11:47 PM
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ChicatSixty
by on May. 25, 2013 at 11:52 PM

And this is why we are the grownups.

It is not safe for her to be there. Not unless it is a supervised visit.

Your little girl does not know what is best here--you do. You are right, only you can save her. You don't bash mom or mom's husband...your daughter will eventually figure it all out.

Anonymous
by Anonymous 1 - Original Poster on May. 26, 2013 at 12:01 AM

 

i know this is all for the best, but i still feel bad. DH and BM were never married, so they have had a custody agreement of one form or another sence LO was born. to think that she has probably been around this stuff for most of her life just breaks my heart.

Quoting ChicatSixty:

And this is why we are the grownups.

It is not safe for her to be there. Not unless it is a supervised visit.

Your little girl does not know what is best here--you do. You are right, only you can save her. You don't bash mom or mom's husband...your daughter will eventually figure it all out.


 

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