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would you allow your 12 yr old dd go on a weekend trip with her bf?

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Yeah, just found out my parents let my 12 year old sister go to the beach for the weekend with her boyfriend and his mom. Would you?

I personally think it's a parenting fail. My parents believe that because she goes to church and does well in school that she won't be sexually active. Smh..

My other sister and I told them we're taking her to get birth control and they got upset. Why? If they'll let her be in a compromising situation, she may as well be protected to some extent..
by on May. 26, 2013 at 10:59 AM
Replies (141-147):
Anonymous
by Anonymous 21 on May. 26, 2013 at 3:28 PM
My dd is ten and showing a small liking to boys and the "talk" is coming very soon. I wanna be open so when she feels the need for bc she can come to me. My mom didn't have the talk with me cause she didn't think I was having sex when I was. It's a shame when some parents turn a blind eye to what is really going on.
It's a good thing your sister has you and your other sister to be there.


Quoting slm047:

I can't force her to go on birth control. I'll suggest it. If she wants it, I'll take her to get it.



My parents won't ever let her go on birth control because they assume she won't have sex until marriage. My older sister and I had to take it upon ourselves to get on birth control.




Quoting Anonymous:

I wouldn't let my 12 year old date, but she could go the weekend as long as I know they wouldn't be alone. But its not yours or yours sister place to but her on BC at such a young age. But I would have a serious talk with her though.


MrsWhite101610
by Gold Member on May. 26, 2013 at 3:41 PM
I agree, I have a dd. She's only 3 but by the time her period starts or she shows the slightest interest in boys dh and myself will discuss birth control and then we will discuss it with her. If she were to become pregnant (however young or old) I will help but she will be mother. I will not get up with anyone's child other than my own at night, I will not bathe or raise in any way any child I did not birth. If dd is in school/working I will babysit, I will take care of the child if its left in my care but she will definitely know I'm grandma, not mommy. I will not plan my life around a child that isn't mine. I hope that doesn't sound harsh in any way, I have no intentions of being harsh shall my dd ever be in that situation. But I will teach her how to raise her own child(ren). Like the saying about teaching you to fish so you will not go hungry, rather than giving you a fish.


Quoting slm047:

I don't agree with my parents. I do agree with your opinion.

I'm hoping my sister will do one of those 2 forms of birth control. I know what it's like to have kids, I'm about to have my 3rd. I just don't want that for her at this age.. just seems careless to chance it. Sexually active or not, may as well be prepared in case she decides to.




Quoting MrsWhite101610:

Why is she dating even? I honestly think dating young is one factor on how we end up with extremely young mothers. I would not let my dd go if I've only met her friend's (of either gender) mother once. I wouldn't know her after one encounter. The only way my dd would go even if the other child was a girl is if I was going as well.





I think you're doing good by getting her birth control. I suggest a shot or implant so your parents can not interfere, she can not forget to take it etc. I'd also try talking them out of letting her go. Explain that anything could happen, consentual sex/rape both possibly leading to a child she would not be able to support and they would have to. Not to mention the toll it would take on her still developing body. I'm not saying there will be sex (consentual or rape) but I'd want to be safe rather than my dd end up suffering.


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Anonymous
by Anonymous 18 on May. 26, 2013 at 3:47 PM
If he wants a friend to bring on trips, then so be it. That doesn't mean he needs a girlfriend just because he will want to bring someone along. You ask why you wouldn't let him? If you can't answer that question yourself, then fail on your apart again. I will not allow things because I'm afraid my kids will defy me. At 12, I am in charge, I call the shots.


Quoting Coconutty4Hubby:

Because if you keep her apart from a boy she likes, then she will start to defy you, become a statistic, on mtv, 16 and pregnant.

Anonpussy, be away with you and your fails.  I will continue to parent my son as I see fit. If he wants a GF at the age of 12, why would I stop him?  He will want a friend on the boat rides and trips we take, doesn't mean they are having sex. Geez.

Quoting Anonymous:

Why?? Why would you even let her start dating at a young age like? What's the rush? No child that age needs to be dating already. Fail on your part.





Quoting Coconutty4Hubby:

I would let my DD (if I had one). 





grambo91
by Gold Member on May. 26, 2013 at 3:50 PM
Baha hell no.
catholicmamamia
by Gold Member on May. 26, 2013 at 4:07 PM

No, I would not. 


                
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Two_Hearts
by on May. 26, 2013 at 4:11 PM

See i have a totally different view on it ...however i am also Canadian and it would be illegal here for you to do so, hence my opinion on the matter being different from yours.

Quoting slm047:

I know I'm not her mother.. however, I'm an older sister that cares. Her mother, under no circumstances would take her to get birth control. In our state, you don't need parental consent. So, if my sister wants it, I should turn a blind eye and not help because my parents believe she won't have sex until marriage?


Quoting Two_Hearts:

My DD is 11...and a 'boyfriend' to me (and DD) is not the same meaning to a 11 yr old as it would be to say...a 15 yr old. 

If i trusted the mother of the boy , and if my daughter was sleeping in the same room with the mom and not the son..then yes i think i would let her go.

I think that you taking her to get BC is going over the line , you are not her mother..your mother is.




strictmomhere
by Ruby Member on May. 26, 2013 at 4:13 PM
Hells no
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