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My dh gets one vacation a year and we are spending it with his parents.

Anonymous
Posted by Anonymous
  • 56 Replies
Which is fine. They haven't seen their grandchild since last year. We all work too much to visit. It is five hours away. I am really nervous though about this trip. I talked to mil tonight. She is very excited to see us. But I am not excited anymore after talking to her. I am dreading it. She said that her daughter who is 18, so my son's aunt wants kadyn to sleep in the room with her every night. He is almost two. We cosleep with him and he has always slept with me. He has some developmental and sensory issues that causes him to wake up a lot. He wakes up every night. A couple times. And he won't sleep with her. He hasn't seen her since he was like eight months. I don't feel comfortable with it. I had issues with his family when ds was a newborn. They kept pushing bottles so they could keep him longer without having to take him to me to eat.

They kept insisting I give him water when he was an ebf newborn because they once again wanted to have longer periods of time with him. They gave him water behind my back even though they knew I didn't want him to have it. They gave him peanut butter at three months. They pushed me to give solids at four months. They got mad and said I was obsessive with writing down his nursing times when he was a newborn and told me I needed to stop making lists. After we had been home from the hospital a few days they blew up at me because I wasn't parenting the way they wanted me to.

I chose to forgive and let it go. But secretly I feel awkward and will never view them the same. I'm not mad but I am having anxiety about the trip. I tried to just say we will see how he does sleeping in her room. To which she just said oh he will be fine. She always undermines what I say. She means well. I honestly don't think she knows she does it. I don't know what to do if they start gettinf controlling again. Last time I just smiled and acted like I was taking in the advice but they kept persisting. Wwyd?
Posted by Anonymous on May. 29, 2013 at 7:57 PM
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Replies (1-10):
Anonymous
by Anonymous 2 on May. 29, 2013 at 8:00 PM
4 moms liked this

my advise?  get a hotel room.  i have the same issues with my mil and the only solution is seperate space.

littlesippycup
by Baby T-rex Arms on May. 29, 2013 at 8:00 PM
1 mom liked this

Sounds like they're up to their old tricks. You should try to loosen up though now that he's older. Let him wake her up all night while you get some good sleep. If he's really struggling go get him.

k1kelley
by Kim on May. 29, 2013 at 8:00 PM
1 mom liked this
Stand your ground and make sure DH is behind you. Good luck, so glad my in-laws can't do that to me anymore.
Anonymous
by Anonymous 1 - Original Poster on May. 29, 2013 at 8:01 PM
I wish we could. We can't afford it.


Quoting Anonymous:

my advise?  get a hotel room.  i have the same issues with my mil and the only solution is seperate space.


Anonymous
by Anonymous 3 on May. 29, 2013 at 8:02 PM

I have a similar problem.  This year, we are staying in a hotel.  Dh will take the kids to visit and I will have some "me" time to myself.  I won't have to deal with them at all.  Compromise.

Anonymous
by Anonymous 1 - Original Poster on May. 29, 2013 at 8:03 PM
I know if we tried to it would become a big deal. which is why whenever I talk to her and she always gives advice I just say oh that's a good idea thanks etc. I feel like I have to walk on egg shells.


Quoting k1kelley:

Stand your ground and make sure DH is behind you. Good luck, so glad my in-laws can't do that to me anymore.

Anonymous
by Anonymous 4 on May. 29, 2013 at 8:03 PM

If you anticipate a problem, stay at a hotel. 

Anonymous
by Anonymous 2 on May. 29, 2013 at 8:03 PM
Quoting Anonymous:

I wish we could. We can't afford it.


Quoting Anonymous:

my advise?  get a hotel room.  i have the same issues with my mil and the only solution is seperate space.


lol. i used to think i couldnt afford it either. but after 3-4 visits of pure hell i realized it was the only way to make it work without murdering someone.
Anonymous
by Anonymous 1 - Original Poster on May. 29, 2013 at 8:04 PM
The problem is they love me and think everything is fine. They have no idea they do this. They Seriously don't realize how they act


Quoting Anonymous:

I have a similar problem.  This year, we are staying in a hotel.  Dh will take the kids to visit and I will have some "me" time to myself.  I won't have to deal with them at all.  Compromise.


Anonymous
by Anonymous 1 - Original Poster on May. 29, 2013 at 8:04 PM
They would be really offended if we got a hotel


Quoting Anonymous:

Quoting Anonymous:

I wish we could. We can't afford it.





Quoting Anonymous:

my advise?  get a hotel room.  i have the same issues with my mil and the only solution is seperate space.




lol. i used to think i couldnt afford it either. but after 3-4 visits of pure hell i realized it was the only way to make it work without murdering someone.

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