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Mom Confessions Mom Confessions

I confronted my mom over the child support my dad paid her

Anonymous
Posted by Anonymous
  • 293 Replies
5 moms liked this

I am 21 years old and from a young age, I have always gotten two different stories, one from my mom that my dad was a POS who barely paid any CS and one from my dad asking me and me why I didn't have new shoes or whatever it was I needed  because CS should have covered that. So went to the clerk of courts to get all the court papers to find out the truth.

The truth was that my dad paid from between $1600 and $2100 a month (it was raised several times over the years) in child support. There is nothing filed saying that he has every failed to pay. The problem is, there were MANY times that I didn't have things I should have had. I learned to tell my mom my shoes were too small just before they actually were because I knew I would have to wait a couple weeks, she couldn't afford to let my in many school activities that I wanted to do, I wore inexpensive clothes most of the time. Then as a teenager, from the time I was about 14, I babysat and bought my own clothes and shoes. I didn't understand why she couldn't buy me these things, knowing how much she was getting, I should have been able to have nice clothes even after she used the child support to pay for my part of the bills and she could have saved up for me to go to college. That money was for me, not for her and SF and their kids to live on (they had 2 together and he had 3 with his ex).

I asked my mom about it. She said that she didn't think it was fair for me to have more then my half and step siblings.She said that they went through a lot of hard times and if the child support would have been just spent on me (again, including my share of the bills) they wouldn't have been able to make ends meet. She even admitted that they actually used one month's worth of child support to pay SF's child support for the past 5 months so he didn't get into legal trouble.

I feel betrayed. She was trusted with that money, to use that money for me. She should have used 1/5 of it towards the bills (since there were 5 of us living there full time) and the rest should have been used for things I needed and any extra should have been put into a college fund for me. It was not money meant to pay SF's child support and it was not money meant to support the whole family. I feel like she robbed me. I am now beginning to see why my dad was so bitter, he tried to hide it but I could always tell.

Like I said, the money should have been used for my share of the bill, I am not saying that she should have taken me shopping every month with it but to use to on more then my share of the bills and while I needed new shoes or wore crappy clothes was wrong. I also don't think kids are entitled to college funds but since she clearly had extra money that was meant for me after buying what I needed and paying my share of the bills, I think it's wrong that she didn't put it aside for me.

After telling her all that, she called me an ingrateful brat. She should be grateful to me as apparently, my child support helped support the whole family.

Posted by Anonymous on Jun. 6, 2013 at 11:37 AM
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Replies (1-10):
Anonymous
by Anonymous - Original Poster on Jun. 6, 2013 at 11:37 AM

BUMP!

Anonymous
by Anonymous - Original Poster on Jun. 6, 2013 at 11:38 AM

BUMP!

mom0f3thatsme
by Member on Jun. 6, 2013 at 11:41 AM
wow, I'm sorry... that sucks.
Maks1mommy
by Ruby Member on Jun. 6, 2013 at 11:43 AM

I just found out my dad was paying child support for me until last year, I'm 20 and have lived on my own since I was 17... =/

momof6nokc
by Gold Member on Jun. 6, 2013 at 11:44 AM

I think your mom is related to my SD's mother :o(

Rlmama00
by Silver Member on Jun. 6, 2013 at 11:44 AM
20 moms liked this
And this is exactly why I feel that there should be at least some documentation of where child support funds are actually being spent. I'm sorry that your mom sucks as a person.
Anonymous
by Anonymous - Original Poster on Jun. 6, 2013 at 11:45 AM

That's crazy. On the other hand, why didn't he know you didn't live at home?



Quoting Maks1mommy:

I just found out my dad was paying child support for me until last year, I'm 20 and have lived on my own since I was 17... =/



Anonymous
by Anonymous on Jun. 6, 2013 at 11:45 AM
41 moms liked this

Well, yes, you are acting like an ungrateful brat. Had I been in your situation, I would have felt like shit if my mom was spending $1,600-$2,100/mo on me, while my siblings went hungry. Grow up and get over it.

Elle.tea.22
by Ruby Member on Jun. 6, 2013 at 11:47 AM
I would have felt the same.
Maks1mommy
by Ruby Member on Jun. 6, 2013 at 11:47 AM

He did, he thought my mom was giving it to me. They're actually in a huge war over that and my brother now. My mom wants $700 for each of us (Even though I'm a married adult living on my own and my brother is 18) and my dad wants all that money back. It's a big mess.

Quoting Anonymous:

That's crazy. On the other hand, why didn't he know you didn't live at home?



Quoting Maks1mommy:

I just found out my dad was paying child support for me until last year, I'm 20 and have lived on my own since I was 17... =/




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