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Mom Confessions Mom Confessions

I don't hate porn...

Anonymous
Posted by Anonymous
  • 28 Replies

I see all these posts about how if your man watches porn it is like cheating because they want to be with the woman in the movie.  Actually they don't think that way at all.  I did a research paper for my psychology class on this.  I interviewed a lot of men.  They do not fantasize about being the one that is having sex with the girl.  It is more of a voyeur thing.  Men are very visual.  Why do you think they are the ones that want the lights on and want to do all those positions that are uncomfortable, lol.  Women are more emotional.  They want the kissing and touching and closeness of missionary.  They could care less if they see their partner most of the time.  That is why so many women think that men are watching porn because they want to be with the other woman.  Because they think that way.  Men don't.  Not one man I interviewed said that he was pretending to be with the other woman.  He said it was the thrill of watching the act and the positions.  And sometimes the wife would not do certain things they liked to do or see, like blowjobs or anal, and watching porn was a way to get to at least see it being done since that was their fetish. Sometimes the wife just does not have the same sex drive as the husband so he needs some way to get his release because his wife is satisfied with once every two weeks and he wants it twice a day.  Another reason was that men usually have a certain type.  My husband for example likes blond hair.  I have dark brown hair.  He has been with blonds, as well as other girls with different haircolor.  We just happen to be a match in everything else.  When he watches porn, it is mostly blond girls he chooses to watch.  Does this make me think I am not good enough because I am not blond?  No it just shows he likes blonds so if he has a variety of girls to watch to get off obviously he is going to choose one that is more his "type".  Men are not emotional when it comes to sex.  Women are.  So women take offense and make men viewing porn about them and make it into something about them not being good enough.  If you were not good enough he would not be with you at all.  Be glad he is not taking it further and sleeping with another person that will give him a bj or anal or do it everyday or whatever he wants.  

Posted by Anonymous on Jun. 14, 2013 at 3:48 PM
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Replies (1-10):
theosgirl45
by Platinum Member on Jun. 14, 2013 at 3:51 PM

I love porn.  I don't want to have sex with porn stars.  I don't think very many of them are too attractive.  I love my DH and sex with him is amazing.  I would never cheat on him.  I think I like porn because like you said its kind of taboo and you get to watch other people have sex.  We watch together and we watch alone.  But I would never say that someone who feels differently about it than I do is wrong(which I get a lot).

In vain he thrusts his fists against the posts and still insists he sees the ghosts.

Anonymous
by Anonymous - Original Poster on Jun. 15, 2013 at 9:31 AM

BUMP!

Anonymous
by Anonymous 2 on Jun. 15, 2013 at 9:44 AM
1 mom liked this

My husband doesn't watch it at all. Thankfully. 

Anonymous
by Anonymous 3 on Jun. 15, 2013 at 9:53 AM

Watching porn once in a while is fine. Being so addicted to it that you choose to stay locked in a room 12+ hours a day instead of spending time with your spouse is completely different. I have had the latter problem with my husband, so I think I have a completely legit reason for not liking porn. It took years for him to admit he had a problem, and if he wasn't a great husband in every other way, I would not have stayed around and fought for our marriage. I would have given up. Things are much better now, but porn can be a bad thing. Just because some women are ok with it doesn't mean everyone has to be. Oh, and I despise the "well, it's just porn, at least he's not with other women" thing. He tried to pull that one me once. "Well, at least I'm just watching porn. Would you rather I was cheating on you?" Kinda comes across like an ultimatum. Let me watch porn or I'll go cheat on you instead. Not gonna go over well with me. 

Anonymous
by Anonymous - Original Poster on Jun. 15, 2013 at 10:21 AM


why are you thankful?  And how do you know for certain he never views it?  It can be hidden very easily and very well.

Quoting Anonymous:

My husband doesn't watch it at all. Thankfully. 



Anonymous
by Anonymous - Original Poster on Jun. 15, 2013 at 10:22 AM


In your case it is a problem, but then again any addiction is.  It is no different then if he was an alchoholic or crackhead.  It is an addiction.  But I am mainly talking about normal healthy, once in a while veiwing.

Quoting Anonymous:

Watching porn once in a while is fine. Being so addicted to it that you choose to stay locked in a room 12+ hours a day instead of spending time with your spouse is completely different. I have had the latter problem with my husband, so I think I have a completely legit reason for not liking porn. It took years for him to admit he had a problem, and if he wasn't a great husband in every other way, I would not have stayed around and fought for our marriage. I would have given up. Things are much better now, but porn can be a bad thing. Just because some women are ok with it doesn't mean everyone has to be. Oh, and I despise the "well, it's just porn, at least he's not with other women" thing. He tried to pull that one me once. "Well, at least I'm just watching porn. Would you rather I was cheating on you?" Kinda comes across like an ultimatum. Let me watch porn or I'll go cheat on you instead. Not gonna go over well with me. 



Anonymous
by Anonymous 4 on Jun. 15, 2013 at 10:24 AM
I don't hate it, I actually watch it. My husband on the other hand doesn't watch it.
Pooobaihr
by Platinum Member on Jun. 15, 2013 at 10:24 AM

I LOVE porn.

Watch it almost every day.

Anonymous
by Anonymous 5 on Jun. 15, 2013 at 10:25 AM
So basically you contradicted yourself.
'It's not about him wanting someone else, it's just about him wanting someone else, so be glad he's not physically cheating.'
thenameshailie
by Ruby Member on Jun. 15, 2013 at 10:27 AM

I dont mind porn either, its only a problem when it takes away from the time you spend together.

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