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My 11 year old and his first cuss word

Posted by Anonymous
  • 8 Replies

My 11 year old son is a very good boy. Yes, he pouts here and there and sometimes doesn't stop playinig when I ask him to, so I have to tell him 4 more times. But he is a kind-hearted, caring boy. He helps me all around the house. He is as sweet as ever to his younger siblings. Just a good boy. 

So the other day, we are in the car and we get stuck in traffic. He says, "Gosh, there's too much F****** traffic." I turned to him and asked him if he cussed. He said yes. I said, well just don't do it again. He said okay. I wasn't even really upset. I just want him to learn that he will not cuss in front of adults. I know he will do it around his friends alot when he's older and there's nothing I can do to control that because I won't be with him 24/7, while he's at school and sport practice. My BIL is a little old fashioned and when I told him about this he said, "he's a man, he will cuss." 

What do you think?

Posted by Anonymous on Jun. 15, 2013 at 10:34 AM
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Replies (1-8):
by Anonymous 3 on Jun. 15, 2013 at 10:39 AM

My kids occasionally drop a word here or there.  I don't make a big deal out of it, they don't do it often, I let it go.

by Anonymous 4 on Jun. 15, 2013 at 10:41 AM
My son cussed when he was three once. Then again not too long ago. Talk about a parent fail : (. I think you are handling it fine.
by Emerald Member on Jun. 15, 2013 at 10:42 AM

I think you handled it fine and I agree with you. My kids can say whatever they like when they are 18, but they will not swear in my presence until then.

by Platinum Member on Jun. 15, 2013 at 10:45 AM
Eh my boys do it here and there but its my fault cus I cuss like a sailor. I'm trying to use nicer words but its when you step on a toy with sharp pointy things. "Ah fuck that hurts!..I mean...ouch." lol. Other day I stepped on a pine cone barefoot...yeah god damnit came out pretty fast. But as a teen I really didn't cuss but the world brought out my inner cusser.
by Anonymous 5 on Jun. 15, 2013 at 10:47 AM
1 mom liked this

That's just normal growing up!

Mine is 14 (just finished his first year in high school) and has a potty mouth on him. All of his friends have one. Thankfully, his friends don't cuss in front of us and correct my son when he does it in our home!

My DH and I don't cuss and are consistent about telling him not to cuss in front of us or his grandparents. He still does though. : (

My friend told me not to make an issue of it. That it is just a phase that they go through. I hope so.

Good luck. Just be consistent.

by on Jun. 15, 2013 at 10:48 AM
I think words only have the power we give them. If you make the words a big taboo, it's just another way for kids to shock and rebel. I tend to swear like a sailor and when my kids became old enough to not repeat everything i said, yes, i would use swear words in front of them (never directed towards them). They learned that momma might swear in private when she burns her finger cooking, but I'm certainly not going to swear in the grocery store and I do not ever, swear AT people. There's a difference between swear words and being rude and disrespectful.

As a result, now one of my kids will occasionally swear. Only at home, never directed towards someone. He gets zero reaction from me, so it's rare. My middle son knows he CAN swear, just doesn't. And dd will on rare occasions, and with her I remind her about time place, manner- none of which she has gotten wrong yet.

I guess bottom line, i don't see the problem. Your ds said it in private, not to be rude to an individual, and lets face it- traffic IS fucking annoying sometimes.
by Anonymous 6 on Jun. 15, 2013 at 10:53 AM
My 5 year old knows "adult words" and "kid words" my husband and I don't censor ourselves in front of our kids and when my son hears a bad word and wants to repeat us or something he heard he changed it or omits the cuss word.

Example: my husband and I say "fucking retarded" to each other and my son will say "not smart"
Or ONE TIME my husband told our son to tell mommy to "turn off that fucking country bullshit" so my son ran over and said "daddy doesn't like country and asked if you turn it off please" mind you I HEARD how daddy had told him so it was cute that he was so polite about telling me.
by on Jun. 15, 2013 at 10:57 AM

I curse like a sailor but I try not to do it in front of my kids. I have never heard my mother utter a curse word and I do my best not to curse in front of her. My dad and I just got to the point where we curse in front of each other on occasion  but not the f word. My kids have slipped up and said something before but I just explain to them that they are adult words and try not to make a big dela about it unless they repeat them a lot.

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