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Mom Confessions Mom Confessions

She called my child a bastard

Posted by on Jun. 17, 2013 at 5:16 PM
  • 147 Replies
1 mom liked this
My parents live in our family home, it's been passed down to the eldest child for five generations, I'm the sixth generation to live in it. I'm an only child so if they move when they retire or when they pass, it goes to me. I have a six year old son who was the result of a rape when I was a teenager, my husband acts as a dad to him and we don't think any less of him, he's the light of my world. I'm pregnant with my husband and I's biological first. We had a family gathering with a bunch of relatives at my parents house and one of the guests was my great-great-aunt, she's like 90 years old, she's kind of senile and grew up in a different time. We were talking about the house and old memories in it, she grew up in the house, and she asked me what my plans were for it. I explained that we didn't really have a desire for a large house, but I don't want to sell it outside of the family either, so we were planning on keeping our current house and renting my parents house out until my son is old enough, 25ish, and then I will sign it over to him to do with what he wishes. My elderly aunt said "you are leaving it to Abel? Not your next child?" and I said well yes, he lived the first few years of his life in the house and loves it and he is the eldest. And then she said "My grandfather is probably turning in his grave, five generations in this house and it's being left to a bastard." I told her that we don't talk that way and we don't use that word concerning my son and she shouldn't either. I know that shes elderly and doesn't really know what she's saying, she says things like that without even realizing its offensive, but it still hurt and made me angry. I don't even want to have him around her anymore if she thinks of him like that.
by on Jun. 17, 2013 at 5:16 PM
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Replies (1-10):
MilkLover0203
by Ruby Member on Jun. 17, 2013 at 5:18 PM
4 moms liked this

I was gonna say, I hope you stabbed her in the neck with a rusty coat hanger until I saw she is 90. 

ElitestJen
by on Jun. 17, 2013 at 5:20 PM
6 moms liked this

You named your son Abel?  After the murdered brother in the Bible?

As far as "bastard" goes, any child born out of wedlock is one.  Your aunt knew exactly what she was saying.  You were the one that took offense to a common word and it's definition.

dalbax2
by Gold Member on Jun. 17, 2013 at 5:20 PM
1 mom liked this

Why not leave it to any children you have equally?

lenashark
by Ruby Member on Jun. 17, 2013 at 5:21 PM

Quoting MilkLover0203:

I was gonna say, I hope you stabbed her in the neck with a rusty coat hanger until I saw she is 90. 


If she wasn't so old and senile I would have acted more harshly about it, but at her age in her condition, no ones going to get through to her and she doesn't even really know what shes saying, she grew up in the 1920's when leaving an illegitimate child property was practically unheard of.
MrsApple
by Gold Member on Jun. 17, 2013 at 5:21 PM

Wow.Even at 90...my grandmother passed at 92 and she would never have considered talking about anyone like that,especially not a family member!

Anonymous
by Anonymous 1 on Jun. 17, 2013 at 5:21 PM
4 moms liked this

 Its okay....she'll be dead soon.

LucyMom08
by BS Intolerant on Jun. 17, 2013 at 5:23 PM

 Crotchety old woman...just ignore it, no use getting fired up...you know how you treat your son, and how your DH does...that's all that matters...

zetajen
by on Jun. 17, 2013 at 5:24 PM

old people have no filter. it can be funny when it isn't hurtful. If your son didn't hear any of it, I would just ignore it. if he did, it is a good chance to talk about how you can show respect for your family members, even when you don't agree with them. And also talk about how people get when they get old. their mental capacity is diminshed. you can go on to explain exactly why there is nothing wrong with him.

Anonymous
by Anonymous 2 on Jun. 17, 2013 at 5:25 PM
3 moms liked this

Does she not realize that he is YOUR son?  The family bloodline runs in HIS veins.  Has nothing to do with his BF or you not being married when he was born.

LilliesValley
by on Jun. 17, 2013 at 5:26 PM

I get you being hurt and angry but she's 90. That's not an excuse but it is. (If that makes any sense). Honestly I just wouldn't let it upset me. Her grandfather probably would have gone out and killed whoever raped you back then, so yeah, times have changed but we move forward with them. Relics get left behind and die.

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