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k, soooo **update**

Anonymous
Posted by Anonymous
  • 68 Replies
I was talking to my ex SIL on Fb, when she again asked Me about my childhood. She always felt like there was something "off" but no one was talking. Anyway I finally decided that I would just talk to her. I was abused and raped for 5 years as a child by my older brother who was an adult at the time and later became her husband. She is now furious with me for not having told her because she "may" have had children with him and never known. While I can see her fear. They never did have any kids and they've been divorced about 12 years now. It seems like a moot point. And I don't know why she's asking if she didn't want to know. And why the heck was it my place to say something to her? OK sorry. Vent over. And now I'm logging out of fb so as not to continue a convo with her right now.



**update**
We talked a couple times in the last few weeks and I think she understands my position a little better now. She's actually been a help in processing some of it. Thank you ladies for being here when I needed to vent/talk.
Posted by Anonymous on Jun. 20, 2013 at 2:37 AM
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Replies (1-10):
tonesofhome
by on Jun. 20, 2013 at 2:48 AM
1 mom liked this
Don't feed her, she's being dramatic and using your abuse to turn things around so the focius is on her. They have been divorced 12 years, yes I understand her being shocked, but she has no reason to turn the situation around and make it effect her negitively, she should be supporting you for being strong and coming out and speaking about the hell you went through.

Hugs
Anonymous
by Anonymous - Original Poster on Jun. 20, 2013 at 2:54 AM
Thank you for replying. It felt over the top to me. I kind of wish I hadn't said anything bug she's been hunting at having this conversation for a few months and I figured it was enough in the past.

But* hinting*


Quoting tonesofhome:Don't feed her, she's being dramatic and using your abuse to turn things around so the focius is on her. They have been divorced 12 years, yes I understand her being shocked, but she has no reason to turn the situation around and make it effect her negitively, she should be supporting you for being strong and coming out and speaking about the hell you went through.

Hugs
Anonymous
by Anonymous on Jun. 20, 2013 at 2:57 AM
It's spelled Q-u-e-s-o.
Anonymous
by Anonymous - Original Poster on Jun. 20, 2013 at 2:59 AM
If you say so :)


Quoting Anonymous:

It's spelled Q-u-e-s-o.

Anonymous
by Anonymous on Jun. 20, 2013 at 3:02 AM
She's being dramatic; but I understand where she's coming from. I found out after 10 years of marriage and 2 daughters that my fil molested his daughters. No one told me (DH didn't know either); I felt lied to; people let us put our children in his care repeatedly. DH to this day (5 years later) hasn't forgiven his family for putting our daughters at risk.

That's being said; your sil had no children and divorced your brother, so she realky has no reason to freak out. But I'm sure she feeld you all did break her trust; by allowing her to go into a marriage without knowing all the facts.
Anonymous
by Anonymous on Jun. 20, 2013 at 3:03 AM
Just curious, why you told no one your brother raped you?
Anonymous
by Anonymous on Jun. 20, 2013 at 3:04 AM
Sorry about what happened to you. Don't concern yourself with her. I don't know what else to say.

Quoting Anonymous:

If you say so :)




Quoting Anonymous:

It's spelled Q-u-e-s-o.

Anonymous
by Anonymous on Jun. 20, 2013 at 3:04 AM
I agree, something of that magnitude shouldn't be withheld from anyone who is going to have an impact on them.

Quoting Anonymous:

She's being dramatic; but I understand where she's coming from. I found out after 10 years of marriage and 2 daughters that my fil molested his daughters. No one told me (DH didn't know either); I felt lied to; people let us put our children in his care repeatedly. DH to this day (5 years later) hasn't forgiven his family for putting our daughters at risk.



That's being said; your sil had no children and divorced your brother, so she realky has no reason to freak out. But I'm sure she feeld you all did break her trust; by allowing her to go into a marriage without knowing all the facts.
Mommy2b2many
by on Jun. 20, 2013 at 3:07 AM
Wow; I am sorry such an awful thing happened to you. Was this a family secret? I don't think she has a right to be mad at you for never sharing such a personal and painful story. But if the entire family knew; someone should have told her.
Anonymous
by Anonymous - Original Poster on Jun. 20, 2013 at 3:08 AM
I did talk. It didn't do me any good. My parents were far mire concerned with burying it once they could no longer ignore it. I wasn't protected and didn't feel safe why was I going to talk to this girl? I was a child.


Quoting Anonymous:

Just curious, why you told no one your brother raped you?

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