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(Update) My bestfriend killed herself 6 months ago and last night me and her husband were together ( I feel horrible)

Anonymous
Posted by Anonymous
  • 354 Replies
2 moms liked this

She killed herself 6 months ago by taking 60 loritabs, 40 hydrocodone, and washing it down with Southern comfort. She left behind a husband that loved her a lot and 2 kids one being only 8 weeks old. She had postpartum depression and was getting help for it but some how she lost it one day. I was there with him at the hospital for 3 days while she was on life support and he had to make the decision to take her off. I have 2 kids as well and my ex husband is never there so i think it was kind of easy for us to lean on each other. We never let it get very far. He brought hi skids over in the morning and I took them to school and watched the baby while he worked. I would make dinner for all of us than he would take his kids home and we would all do it the next day. Yesterday however he had a bad day. When he came to pick up the kids he was really frustrated because of work so I told him the kids could spend the night  and asked him if he wanted a beer.  he had 2 beers and he started relaxing a bit. Then he told me he did not know what he would do without me. He started talking about how hard it has been for him and the kids and how if it wasnt for me he could not have done it and made it through her death. Well one thing lead to another and we ended up sleeping together last night. This morning when he left he kissed me on the cheek and told me that we have to talk about were we go from here. I do think I an starting to fall in love with him but I am not sure if he feels the same way. I also cannot help but feel I am doing something wrong because he was my best friends husband. Did I do something wrong? Would it be wrong to move forward with him?


Update: We talked about it and he told me that he had strong feelings for me and that he wanted to have a relationship but we have decided to take it slowely because we are both grieving still. He said he did not regret what happened last night and neither do I after I thought about it more. So we have decided to date and see where it goes. Thanks to everyone who shared positive advice and thoughts.

Posted by Anonymous on Jun. 21, 2013 at 10:20 AM
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Replies (1-10):
lancet98
by Platinum Member on Jun. 21, 2013 at 10:22 AM
1 mom liked this

Yeah that's a little soon.

LectioDivina
by on Jun. 21, 2013 at 10:22 AM
31 moms liked this

This is how they do it in romantic movies if that's any help...

EvaSerenity
by Member on Jun. 21, 2013 at 10:23 AM
11 moms liked this
If its only been 6 months, the grieving period is still very active. Not saying you were wrong or right, but its possible that yalls judgment is impaired by pain and loss. Not a good thing to base a relationship on.
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Anonymous
by Anonymous 2 on Jun. 21, 2013 at 10:23 AM
9 moms liked this
Oh my. If that's not a Lifetime movie, I don't know what is.
LectioDivina
by on Jun. 21, 2013 at 10:23 AM
6 moms liked this

But in all reality, I doubt her feelings are hurt... do what's best for the children involved and yourselves.

thenameshailie
by Ruby Member on Jun. 21, 2013 at 10:23 AM
11 moms liked this

I can see why youd feel badly and others probably wont be too supportive, but shes dead. You guys can do whatever you want. However, 6 months isnt long enough to grieve an unexpected death so I wouldnt say now would be the best time to get serious with him. I honestly wouldnt expect it to last if you do.

scarletmeshell
by Platinum Member on Jun. 21, 2013 at 10:24 AM
1 mom liked this
No, I don't think it would be wrong but maybe it is to fast. You both are still grieving.
tapies2324
by Gold Member on Jun. 21, 2013 at 10:25 AM
9 moms liked this
Let the guilt go. I don't think there is anything "wrong" with what happened. Life goes on. The only thing I would do is make sure he is ready for love again. Let him take the lead.
ashley1693
by Gold Member on Jun. 21, 2013 at 10:25 AM
8 moms liked this
Its not wrong. Its not like you were sleeping with him while your friend was alive. And if she loved her husband and wanted him to be happy she would be smiling down on you both right now. I know if I passed away I pray my dh can find someone.
Just take it slow and easy and see what happens. Good luck.
LadyAmaranth
by on Jun. 21, 2013 at 10:25 AM
5 moms liked this

If you both accept that you want to move forward, for the right reasons, than there is nothing wrong with it. 

you both deserve happiness and if he feels the time is right to move forward...Good.

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