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Mom Confessions Mom Confessions

Classmate touched 11yo daughter's breasts (long read) *UPDATE*

Posted by Anonymous
  • 142 Replies

I'm absolutely furious right now but I also need a shoulder to cry on, so please bear with me.

My daughter just turned 11. Her breasts developed very quickly and she already has DD cups. Naturally, it's been extremely difficult for her to have such a large chest when most of her friends don't have anything yet. She was bullied mercilessly this year, mainly by the same few culprits. I was in contact with her teacher and the principal throughout the year, but for whatever reason the school administration was either unwilling or unable to really do anything about it. My daughter is such a shy, awkward girl anyway and also very tall for her age, which makes her an even easier target. Fortunately she has 2 friends who she's very close with and that helped her a bit. We encouraged frequent playdates, sleepovers, etc. with them to keep her focused on positive relationships. It looked like we were going to make it through the school year relatively unscatched.

Wednesday was the last day of school. As she was walking down the hallway to leave, one boy (who has been a major source of grief for her this year) came up behind her and squeezed her breasts. Hard. My daughter was horrified. She kept it together for the most part, but when she got in the car she started sobbing. I marched right into the principal's office and told him exactly what happened including the name of the boy who did it. He said they'd look into it but since it was the last day of school he wasn't sure how much they could do. I don't think I've been angrier in my life.

Two days later and no word. I've probably cried over this more than she has by this point. I just don't know where to turn next (I'm a single mom, btw). A few of my friends have suggested legal action but I have no idea what that involves. I'm not sure I should even send her back to that school next year. It just seems so unfair. My daughter is an extremely sweet girl. Everyone who really knows her loves her. Why should she have to go through this just because her body is different from her peers? It absolutely breaks my heart.

*UPDATE*: Thank you all for the words of concern and support for my daughter and I. It was very comforting to know that many have been through the same thing. I shared some comments with my daughter and got some smiles out of her. That made me feel wonderful.

I contacted the police and we paid the boy and his parents a visit. They suggested my daughter come as well but she was too scared. When we told the parents exactly what happened, they claimed they were horrified and had no idea this was going on. They absolutely ripped him a new one in front of me and the cops. The little worm was of course not so tough now and burst into tears. As bad as it sounds, I sort of enjoyed seeing him get hurt for a change. The mother claimed that her son had a crush on my daughter and was too immature to handle it. It sounded like an excuse to me. She said they would make him apologize in person to my daughter. I know she'll be nervous about it, but I think it's important for her to face him again in a situation where she's in control. I just hope the parents stay true to their word and rein in their son before it's too late and he abuses more people. The police said the school would be informed and they would recommend he start next year with a suspension.

We're also looking into legal action against the school. They are just as responsible for this happening because they ignored the situation throughout the year. There's no way my daughter is going back there next year. I'm considering at a great Quaker school in our area where a few of my friends send their kids. They said they think my girl would fit in very well there and make friends, which would be a huge weight off our shoulders. It's all about building her confidence right now and a positive body image.

Thanks again to everyone and I'll post more updates if anything else comes up!

Posted by Anonymous on Jun. 21, 2013 at 3:29 PM
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Replies (1-10):
by Anonymous 2 on Jun. 21, 2013 at 3:32 PM
24 moms liked this
Sexual assault. Cops. Now.
by Platinum Member on Jun. 21, 2013 at 3:34 PM
That's ridiculous! :(
Posted on CafeMom Mobile
by Anonymous 3 on Jun. 21, 2013 at 3:36 PM
11 moms liked this

Contact the police. That is sexual assault and the boy needs to learn his lesson.

by Anonymous 4 on Jun. 21, 2013 at 3:36 PM
1 mom liked this

 Yep - there is no excuse for that. 

Quoting Anonymous:

Sexual assault. Cops. Now.


by Ruby Member on Jun. 21, 2013 at 3:37 PM

Why in the world didn't you call the cops???

by Gold Member on Jun. 21, 2013 at 3:38 PM
Police. Sexual assault. Now. Little shit-what a pig. His parents can deal with it. So sorry.
by Anonymous 5 on Jun. 21, 2013 at 3:39 PM

Poor girl. That boy needs to get his shit straightened out.

by Anonymous 3 on Jun. 21, 2013 at 3:41 PM

Contact the police. They will deal with it. 

by on Jun. 21, 2013 at 3:41 PM
4 moms liked this
If I had a daughter I wouldn't have left until the cops were called.
by Ruby Member on Jun. 21, 2013 at 3:43 PM
I would have called the cops immediately.
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