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Mom Confessions Mom Confessions

My daughter is having an abortion Update

Posted by Anonymous   + Show Post

It is monday morning. She is 17 (not 16 stupid typo) and just told me last week that she was pregnant. My heart sank but I stayed calm and talked to her. We talked about all her options and I had her make a pros and cons list about all of them. I let her think about it for a few days. She decided that she felt that abortion was the best option. She is 17 and going into her senior year. She does not feel she is ready to be a mother. She is not one of those "really mature" for her age type kids. She does well in school but she is not close to being an adult (maturity wise) just last week she had a freak out because she wanted to go to a party and I said no. She does not want to get a job because it will "disrupt" her social life. She does the most minimal chores around the house. She recognizes these things and told me that she is just not ready. I support her decision. We went to a crisis pregnancy center so she could talk to some other people and even went to a group counseling session for others in her position. She still thinks abortion is the best option. I am not sure if it is what I personally would do in her position but I do support her and will be there holding her hand. We are also going to talk about better birth control (she said she used condoms) again and get her on something. 

Well this is my confession 

Update: the procedure went well. They gave her some heavy meds and it was over in less than a minute. She waited in the recovery room for an hour and then I brought her home. She feels relieved and is glad this is what she did. 

Posted by Anonymous on Jun. 22, 2013 at 8:50 PM
Replies (61-70):
AnastasiaKorsh
by on Jun. 22, 2013 at 9:08 PM
1 mom liked this
It's good you're supporting what she wants.
However, she sounds pretty entitled and I would work towards changing that. including insisting that she get a job.
xoxRachelxox
by on Jun. 22, 2013 at 9:08 PM

It's great that you are there for her. 


Anonymous
by Anonymous 13 on Jun. 22, 2013 at 9:09 PM

I'm glad you are being supportive of her choice. Good luck to you and your daughter. (Make sure to remind her of her birth control every day!)

MalakbelLacuna
by on Jun. 22, 2013 at 9:09 PM
Why should she be forced to carry to term. She knows she isn't ready to be a mom. I'm almost sure she will learn from this.

Quoting Anonymous:

WHY can't she put the baby up for adoption?  It's a LIFE, don't allow her to destroy it!

Posted on CafeMom Mobile
mommy2alissa
by Silver Member on Jun. 22, 2013 at 9:09 PM
2 moms liked this

Nope. My job is to raise them to the best of my abilities. If they think they are adult enough to have sex, get pregnant, and then kill the baby, they are grown up enough to get the fuck out of my house. 

Quoting Anonymous:

Well putting your children in foster care is running from your responsibilites also...

Quoting mommy2alissa:

I would turn them over to foster care. That is legal. I will always love them, but that is one of the very few things that would make them no longer welcome to live in our home. Abortion is not taking responsibility for their actions, it is running from it. 

Quoting Anonymous:


Wow really? You would just kick them out even if it is against the law?

I could not imagine doing that. 

Quoting mommy2alissa:

My kids are not welcome to live with me if they have an abortion. Adoption I will support, killing the baby...not so much. 







Anonymous
by Anonymous 6 on Jun. 22, 2013 at 9:10 PM
I would feel she should be working 30-40 hours in the summer (volunteering included). 20 hours during the school year. She should be made to be solely responsible for anything that isn't a necessity. This includes anything beyond basic clothing needs, food, medical and basic hygiene.

Quoting Anonymous:


She was planning on getting a summer job but decided to do some volunteer work instead. Do you think she should still get a job on top of that?

She is my youngest and I thought I did really great with my older kids but clearly something went wrong with my parenting with her. 

She does do regular chore she just does not voluteer to do more than what she is required to do. 


Quoting Anonymous:

I would like to add, regardless of her decision here, it's time to make her start acting like an adult. She still needs to get a job, and she needs to become responsible. She should be doing regular chores. She's clearly making the adult choice to have sex, so its time to be treated like one.



Quoting Anonymous:


That was me. My post got deleted so I thought I would try again. I did talk to many people who really helped me cope with it. 



Quoting Anonymous:

I'm sorry, but someone posted something worded almost exactly the same a few days ago.








paganmommy4
by on Jun. 22, 2013 at 9:10 PM
1 mom liked this

at least she has your support and at least she knows that she's not ready for being a parent and can't handle it yet. 

MalakbelLacuna
by on Jun. 22, 2013 at 9:10 PM
1 mom liked this
How old are your children?

Quoting mommy2alissa:

Nope. My job is to raise them to the best of my abilities. If they think they are adult enough to have sex, get pregnant, and then kill the baby, they are grown up enough to get the fuck out of my house. 

Quoting Anonymous:

Well putting your children in foster care is running from your responsibilites also...


Quoting mommy2alissa:

I would turn them over to foster care. That is legal. I will always love them, but that is one of the very few things that would make them no longer welcome to live in our home. Abortion is not taking responsibility for their actions, it is running from it. 

Quoting Anonymous:


Wow really? You would just kick them out even if it is against the law?

I could not imagine doing that. 


Quoting mommy2alissa:

My kids are not welcome to live with me if they have an abortion. Adoption I will support, killing the baby...not so much. 









Posted on CafeMom Mobile
2manydiapers
by on Jun. 22, 2013 at 9:11 PM
Then if the two who made the baby , made that choice so be it.


Hope she holds off on sex in the future, abortion shouldn't become a form of birth control.


Quoting Anonymous:

He wants nothing to do with her and he agrees that abortion is best 



Quoting 2manydiapers:

What does the father want?




gemikris82
by on Jun. 22, 2013 at 9:11 PM
5 moms liked this

 wow, you just made me appreciate my mom even more than i do.  when i was pregnant  and decided to have the abortion she was there with me for every appointment, paid for it, and helped me though it. 


Quoting mommy2alissa:

Nope. My job is to raise them to the best of my abilities. If they think they are adult enough to have sex, get pregnant, and then kill the baby, they are grown up enough to get the fuck out of my house. 

Quoting Anonymous:

Well putting your children in foster care is running from your responsibilites also...

Quoting mommy2alissa:

I would turn them over to foster care. That is legal. I will always love them, but that is one of the very few things that would make them no longer welcome to live in our home. Abortion is not taking responsibility for their actions, it is running from it. 

Quoting Anonymous:

 

Wow really? You would just kick them out even if it is against the law?

I could not imagine doing that. 

Quoting mommy2alissa:

My kids are not welcome to live with me if they have an abortion. Adoption I will support, killing the baby...not so much. 

 

 


 

 



 

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