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Mom Confessions Mom Confessions

Should I warn him???? *Update #1*

Anonymous
Posted by Anonymous
  • 170 Replies

 

Poll

Question: Warn him or no? Should I (review options completely above):

Options:

A (simple warning to DH)

B (advise that if he doesn't defend me, I will)

C (shock em all)

D (doormat)


Only group members can vote in this poll.

Total Votes: 236

View Results

My in-laws will be here tomorrow.  The feeling of dread is becoming worse.  I actually get sick the day I am going to see them.  They are simply wretched.

I told my mom this morning that I am stressed out trying to clean up the house.  Everything is a mess because we just got home from a vacation.  I'm still trying to do heaps of laundry and put away suitcases and baby gear.  My husband is a TERRIBLE helper around the house.  I already struggle to get everything done because he is a bigger messmaker than the kids.  (Leaves dirty clothes in the bathroom floor, filthy dishes in the sink, grimy coffee cups on his desk, shoes all over the house.... It's mind boggling how incapable he is of picking up after himself)  My mom told me to just give up, apologize for the mess, and explain that it is hard to clean up after six people with no effort from anyone else.  I'm just not sure I could throw him under the bus like that.  Plus I'm too proud.  I would fall over dead if my own mother walked in right now... nevermind his mother!

My in-laws have MAJOR boundary issues.  I've ended up in my bedroom (or once hiding behind the shower curtain in the tub) crying at least once every time they have visited.  I told my mom this morning that I am scared to death of this visit because I am about 95% certain that this is going to be the one that I stop letting them victimize me and snap back.

I've tried so hard to keep the peace.  I'm over it.  They are terrible.  I'm sick of trying.

So I need a bit of advice.... Should I warn my DH that I do not plan to internalize or tolerate their craziness this time?  He knows about the situations in the past.  I am not sure if I should:

A- Simply state that I will not sit by quietly this time while I am insulted or my boundaries are trampled

B- Tell him that I will not tolerate their inconsiderate behavior again, and if I am insulted or trampled, I will speak up if he chooses not to.

C- Let him be surprised along with them when his quiet, polite wife goes totally ballistic

D- Keep being a doormat

Update #1

They are still not here.  They decided to stay at the beach (the first half of the vacation) longer.  This is kind of another one of my gripes.  They don't consider anyone else when they travel.  Initially, they planned the trip for the same week that we were going to the beach with 3 other families, and she tried to tell me that I HAD TO move our trip.  Needless to say that did not happen.  So then I was told that they would be arriving at our home between Tuesday and Thursday, which I thought was a bit vague.  A three day window makes it difficult for us to plan for our day to day life and make plans for while they are here (meals, husband staying home to visit, etc)  Then it was Wednesday for sure.  Then on Tuesday night, it was Friday.  I've turned down plans.  I've cancelled a doctor's appointment.  No, it isn't major.  But why do I have to put my life on hold because they are incapable of making plans?  Ugh.  Will update as needed. :)

Posted by Anonymous on Jun. 25, 2013 at 1:52 PM
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Replies (1-10):
MrsDavidB25
by Stacey on Jun. 25, 2013 at 1:53 PM
9 moms liked this

 I'd just lock the door, and pretend I am not home. Problem solved!

Anonymous
by Anonymous 2 on Jun. 25, 2013 at 1:54 PM
1 mom liked this

I vote C.  Let him be surprised.  Life is much more fun with some unexpected turns.

happinessforyou
by Gold Member on Jun. 25, 2013 at 1:54 PM

I vote for C. If/when something happens-let it rip! lol 
GL

alc4evermom
by on Jun. 25, 2013 at 1:54 PM
1 mom liked this

Don't be a doormat!!!  It's your house!!!  Even if it wasn't they will keep walking on you if you let them.  

Anonymous
by Anonymous 3 on Jun. 25, 2013 at 1:55 PM
1 mom liked this

A or C. If he's never defended you before, you can't expect him to start now. Men are inconsiderate.

vegaswife2011
by LMAO on Jun. 25, 2013 at 1:55 PM
2 moms liked this

B. Why isn't he standing up for you to begin with? You don't deserve that!

IWantOneMorePlz
by Gold Member on Jun. 25, 2013 at 1:56 PM
1 mom liked this

c..definately.  If he can't tell his mom and dad to back off, then he deserves to get yelled at too.

Anonymous
by Anonymous 1 - Original Poster on Jun. 25, 2013 at 1:56 PM
SO tempting!
Quoting MrsDavidB25:

 I'd just lock the door, and pretend I am not home. Problem solved!


Anonymous
by Anonymous 1 - Original Poster on Jun. 25, 2013 at 1:56 PM

I voted C, too.  LOL.


Quoting Anonymous:

I vote C.  Let him be surprised.  Life is much more fun with some unexpected turns.



foreveryoung921
by Member on Jun. 25, 2013 at 1:57 PM
C! Give 'em hell!
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