Do you feel like people seek you out to argue about your parenting style?
by Jeanne Sager
Watchers of The Big Bang Theory know Mayim Bialik as the hilarious actress who plays neurobiologist Amy Farrah Fowler. But in parenting circles, Bialik might be even better known as the mother whose dedication to attachment parenting is legendary. The mother of two has been fighting for attention for her co-sleeping, extended breastfeeding ways for years now ... only now she can't understand why people are always picking fights with her about it!
Ahem! Moms! Dads! If you're picking the path of advocacy parenting, take note! It WILL end up biting you in the rear end eventually!
According to a recent interview Bialik gave, every time she turns around, she finds herself having to defend her parenting choices:
If I'm talking to girlfriends, if I'm talking to random people, and we're talking about parenting, I tell them what works for me and why ... But a lot of people want to ask me things so that they can fight with me.
And just because I'm a public person, who happened to have breastfed and slept with her kids, that doesn't mean that I want to fight with you on the street or in the supermarket.
I can't really blame her. Parenting is such a personal thing that having it picked apart -- even by strangers -- can be devastating.
But even while I feel some mother-to-mother sympathy for Bialik, it's tempered by the fact that she put herself out there, not the other way around. She wrote the book on attachment parenting. Literally!!
And while I tried to read Beyond the Sling, really tried, I had to give up about halfway through because it was simply too judgmental. Bialik's words are practically dripping with the disdain for us common folk who disagree with -- or can't afford!! -- her extremist child-centric views.
Note I say HER extremist views, AP parents. Because while she does advocate many things common for attachment parents, Bialik takes them a step further than most.
She is a classic advocacy parent, the type who takes her beliefs about how moms and dads SHOULD live and attempts to foist them on others.
It's one way to parent. If that's you, and your beliefs are that strong. It's especially tempting when you are new to this whole parenting thing, when your child is a baby, and you're just so impressed with yourself that you can actually DO it, that you've convinced yourself that your way is THE way, the truth, the light.
But there is an important lesson to be learned before you start, a lesson Bialik exemplifies so well in her recent complaints: judge not, lest ye be judged!
Because there's nothing quite like taking a judgy mom down a peg or two, is there?
What do you think of the backlash Bialik is getting? Do you feel like people seek you out to argue about your parenting style?