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Mom Confessions Mom Confessions

She is bipolar...is her child in danger? EDIT: To clarify, I am more concerned about him...

Anonymous
Posted by Anonymous
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I have this friend, whom I have known for almost 4 years. She had her daughter 5 days after I had my youngest. She always seemed a little off, but things got bad after the birth. She was diagnosed bipolar, and has been trying to get on the right meds for a while now. So she was a single mom, met a man, and now they live together, plan on getting married.

He says he fell in love with her daughter before he loved her. A few months after they got together is when she was diagnosed. And he stayed with her. My question is: did he stay for her or her daughter?

She keeps pushing me to let my girls spend the night over there. And I just can't do it. I get a bad feeling every time she brings it up. I don't know if it is because she seems so spastic that I worry she won't be able to take care of 3 girls at the same time, or because of him. He seems nice, but seeing how she acts, doesn't work, maxes out HIS cards constantly, only for him to have to pay them off, etc I just don't know...

Thoughts?

 

EDIT: She seems like a great mom with her own daughter, is nice to my girls, seems to really like them. I guess I should have clarified a bit more: her boyfriend is quiet, doesn't talk much, etc. She doesn't treat him all that great, he fully supports her and her daughter, and found out she was bipolar soon after they started dating..I know I am an overprotective mom, but I just wonder if he stayed for the daughter, not the mom...

Posted by Anonymous on Jun. 26, 2013 at 11:12 AM
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Replies (1-10):
Anonymous
by Anonymous on Jun. 26, 2013 at 11:29 AM

Wow.  Can you clarify?  Are you saying that all bipolar people will physically harm their kids eventually? 


Quoting Anonymous:

I work in health care and I have had a LOT of patients with bipolar. Based on my assessment, yes the child is in danger. Unfortunately its just a matter of time. May not be NOW but in a few years...



lnrmom
by Ruby Member on Jun. 26, 2013 at 11:34 AM
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Uhm. I'm bipolar and not medicated. My kids have NEVER been in danger.

lnrmom
by Ruby Member on Jun. 26, 2013 at 11:35 AM
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 I'm bipolar. I have more than one friend that is bipolar. My kids have NEVER been in danger, and neither have the kids of my friends. Before you make blanket statements like that, you might want to reconsider.


Quoting Anonymous:

I work in health care and I have had a LOT of patients with bipolar. Based on my assessment, yes the child is in danger. Unfortunately its just a matter of time. May not be NOW but in a few years...


 

my4kidsrock2
by Gold Member on Jun. 26, 2013 at 11:36 AM
4 moms liked this

I have Bipolar I w/psychotic tendancies, borderline personality disorder, anxiety disorder, and PTSD. At no time have I ever been a danger to my children. I have been a dnager to myself but I have never even thought of harming my children in any way. They are the reason I am alive and doing as well as I am.

I know that there are people out there with Bipolar or other disorders that can be a danger to their children but to lump all of us into one catagory is quite unfair. There are plenty of us who would never hurt another person and can actually be one of the nicest people you will ever know.

CMcLaws
by Platinum Member on Jun. 26, 2013 at 11:37 AM
4 moms liked this
Good lord, glad you're not my doctor.

Op, I have been unmedictaed for bipolar disorder for two years, and my kids have never EVER been in any danger. Bipolar disorder is obviously different with different people though, and you should definitely follow your gut feeling. Just make sure it's based on actual behavior, not just the name of the diagnosis. :-)


Quoting Anonymous:

I work in health care and I have had a LOT of patients with bipolar. Based on my assessment, yes the child is in danger. Unfortunately its just a matter of time. May not be NOW but in a few years...

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2kids2dogs2cats
by Silver Member on Jun. 26, 2013 at 11:38 AM

More than being bi-polar the statement "I fell in love with her daughter before her" worries me the most, she needs to most likely be put in a facility for a couple of weeks so they can get her on a regimine of meds, but alot of bi-polars refuse to take them.

No I would not allow my kids over there, as much as from what you describe he is allowing to continue to happen, maxing out CC's and such, makes me wonder why he isn't more proactive in helping her get stable, unless it is allowing him to do thing that maybe he shouldn't be doing.

Anonymous
by Anonymous on Jun. 26, 2013 at 11:41 AM
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Anonymous
by Anonymous on Jun. 26, 2013 at 11:42 AM
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If you truly work in the health care field, then you are doing a terrible, no-good, very bad job.

I am a former social worker.

You are prejudging people. With that behavior you have NO BUSINESS working in any kind of field that helps people.

Perosnally, I know of doctors, nurses, teachers, lawyers, bank presidents, and successful businesswoman with bipolar. A child is not in danger simple due to their disease.



Quoting Anonymous:

I work in health care and I have had a LOT of patients with bipolar. Based on my assessment, yes the child is in danger. Unfortunately its just a matter of time. May not be NOW but in a few years...



MrsMiles85
by on Jun. 26, 2013 at 11:42 AM

I handle my mental disorders just fine thankya very much.  I have no clue what's wrong with me and have no intention of finding out, I just know I've always been a little "off".  Would your children be safe with me?  Hell yes.  I wouldn't hurt them and I wouldn't let anybody else hurt them.  Her maxing out his cards?  Not your business.  Did he stay for her or her daughter?  What does that have to do with letting your girls go over there and again, what business is that of yours? 

MrsMiles85
by on Jun. 26, 2013 at 11:43 AM

You have not assessed this woman.  Nice way to jump the gun and throw people under the bus.   


Quoting Anonymous:

I work in health care and I have had a LOT of patients with bipolar. Based on my assessment, yes the child is in danger. Unfortunately its just a matter of time. May not be NOW but in a few years...


 

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