I told my husband how much it hurts my feelings when he is critical of my housekeeping.
1- I disclosed very early in our relationship that I am a poor housekeeper, but I do try. I am just not naturally a very neat and organized person, and I grew up with a maid. I didn't do my first load of laundry, sweep a floor, or wash a dish until I was in college. It makes me sad that I didn't learn these skills earlier because it truly is hard to develop those habits so late in life. 2- I'm home with four children. I breastfeed two of them every 3 hours. One is potty training. I keep them busy all day with activities and outdoor play to keep them from being sucked into TV. 3- My priority is always having things done for the kids- their laundry, healthy homemade meals, homemade baby food. 4- I am suffering from terrible sleep psychosis. I have not slept more than 4 hours in 6 months, and half the time, I forget where I am and what I am doing.
He is ZERO help at home, and he expects me to do everything for him.
So I tried to explain to him that I am struggling, and that it breaks my heart when he comes home and comments that I do nothing. And wouldn't you know, that jerk said, "Well, when I give you a hard time about it, the next few days you seem to get more done." So I said, "Are you telling me that you say hurtful things to me t try to manipulate me to be more productive?" He shrugged and said, "Yeah.... I guess so."