Moms Who Text Might As Well Hand In Their Good Parent Card
Moms Who Text Might As Well Hand In Their Good Parent Card
by Michele Zipp
Without
reading any study or statistic, it's common sense that having a parent
that is constantly texting or on the phone is bad for kids. It distracts
and detracts from parenting. Police give tickets for texting or talking
on the phone when driving, but parents text and talk on the phone while
parenting all the time. We all do it. And we aren't getting citations
for it. Well not exactly. The consequences are far worse.
When parents talk on the phone or text too much, it can affect the way our children learn language. Here we are overly worried about too much television when we're screwing them up from gabbing on the phone.
Okay, maybe we're not all messing our kids up that much -- parenting is HARD! -- but the more we know what not to do, the better chance we have at not completely failing as mom or dad. Cannot accept failure! Just give them love and they will grow applies, always. But giving them love means putting down your damn phone. (I'm talking to myself here. I write this as I checked my phone three times so far.) This urgency to be in constant communication with the world beyond the one right in front of us is problematic.
I've had phone conversations while my babies played on the rug in front of me and I've texted while they went down the slide at the park. We have to do it sometimes. But we don't have to do it that much. We shouldn't because there are consequences beyond risking our child getting hurt because we aren't paying attention.
A study a few years back actually pointed out that kids who don't hear enough two-sided conversations don't score as high in every stage of language proficiency. Kids want to talk ... to us ... to parents. The more words they hear, the more they learn.
In another study, researchers looked at parent-child interactions at the infant stage. When moms smiled and played with babies as they babbled and played, those babies had a broader range of vocalizations.
And as we can guess, children love and thrive off of live interaction. In a study of 9-month-olds learning Mandarin (what overachievers!), those babies picked up the language best when taught by someone in person.
Kids need a social network. What we think of a social network (Facebook, Instagram, texting, emails) isn't the social network I'm talking about. They need a real live in person social network. Time to unplug ourselves.
Do you ever worry you spend too much time on your phone? What do you do to try not to when with your kids?
if i get a text on my cell I answer it. If Im doing an activity with my child I will wait unless its important.
If I get a text, then it's not important. I don't mean what my friends and family have to say isn't important, I mean that it can wait. If I'm not doing anything, I'll answer immediately. If one of my children are talking to me, I'll wait. If we are doing something together, I'll wait. If it was important, my phone would be ringing.
Nope, I rarely use my phone. The computer I am on a little to often
Good grief. My son will be fine, and he's actually advanced in language. I don't think it's reasonable (Or healthy!) to suggest I need to stop talking to other people, and run my life around him.
I dont. Every once and a while i will get stuck on my phone for 10-15 min, but i do it when my kids napping or outside playing. I try not to do too much tv or cm while my kid is up. I think balance is important.
Would you be ok with an 8yr old constantly correcting you?
- Cafe Steph
on Jun. 27, 2013 at 10:04 AM