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Mom Confessions Mom Confessions

I'm an evil step-mom....

Anonymous
Posted by Anonymous
  • 37 Replies

What do you do when your dh and you are not on the same page when it comes to parenting? When he does nothing as far as discipline or enforcing any rules? No bedtimes, playing video games for as long as they want (literally all day and all night), not picking up after themselves, and not having any responsibilities is what I mean. I understand they are not here fulltime but my kids see this behavior and I don't want them growing up thinking it's okay. I prefer structure and a schedule. I prefer my kids have chores, clean up, go to bed at a decent time even during the summer, and not sit on some form of electronic 24/7. It drives me nuts and I feel completely overran and almost like a guest in my own home when they are here. I've tried talking to dh about it and he agrees we should enforce certain rules but then when it comes down to it I am the only one doing the enforcing so I am seen as being "mean" or "too strict". The kids have even made comments like "this is the only time we get to play games" or "but our mom makes us do chores all the time at home". So it's obvious they should know what is expected but dh has let it go on for so long. How can I gain some control of my home and turn things around?

Posted by Anonymous on Jun. 30, 2013 at 5:10 PM
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Replies (1-10):
Anonymous
by Anonymous - Original Poster on Jun. 30, 2013 at 5:23 PM

bump

Anonymous
by Anonymous on Jun. 30, 2013 at 6:33 PM
1 mom liked this
Stay strong! You are right and he is soooo wrong!
elliem87
by on Jun. 30, 2013 at 6:37 PM
Dude... I completely understand. My DH never punishes either of his kids. It is ALWAYS me.

Well today, little SD jumped off a dock without her life jacket. She can't swim. I ran into the water fully clothed and got her.

He said that he is no longer going to put up with how SD treats me.


Stay strong. Good luck.
Anonymous
by Anonymous - Original Poster on Jun. 30, 2013 at 7:08 PM
Oh wow. That's crazy!
I'm really trying to. It gets so overwhelming at times and I feel like most of the repercussions of lack of discipline fall on me. I generally end up picking up the pieces.

Quoting elliem87:

Dude... I completely understand. My DH never punishes either of his kids. It is ALWAYS me.



Well today, little SD jumped off a dock without her life jacket. She can't swim. I ran into the water fully clothed and got her.



He said that he is no longer going to put up with how SD treats me.





Stay strong. Good luck.
elliem87
by on Jun. 30, 2013 at 7:28 PM
I know it's hard.

I really do understand where you are coming from.


Quoting Anonymous:

Oh wow. That's crazy!

I'm really trying to. It gets so overwhelming at times and I feel like most of the repercussions of lack of discipline fall on me. I generally end up picking up the pieces.



Quoting elliem87:

Dude... I completely understand. My DH never punishes either of his kids. It is ALWAYS me.





Well today, little SD jumped off a dock without her life jacket. She can't swim. I ran into the water fully clothed and got her.





He said that he is no longer going to put up with how SD treats me.








Stay strong. Good luck.

Anonymous
by Anonymous on Jun. 30, 2013 at 7:30 PM
1 mom liked this

You probably favor your kids any way..it's gonna be rough...hope you enjoy the ride..

Anonymous
by Anonymous - Original Poster on Jun. 30, 2013 at 7:47 PM
Obviously it's different with my own but I don't favor them. I actually get onto my dd more than anyone. I am harder on her. Mainly because i dont feel i have a say when it comes to dh's. How can i when their father wont back me up? My other is just a baby. Already his sleep schedule is all screwed up because they come in and out of his room even after I've told them he's trying to sleep.

Quoting Anonymous:

You probably favor your kids any way..it's gonna be rough...hope you enjoy the ride..

Anonymous
by Anonymous on Jun. 30, 2013 at 7:48 PM
1 mom liked this
Not your kids, back off!
Anonymous
by Anonymous on Jun. 30, 2013 at 7:51 PM
I'm sure you favor your own. Who cares if it's different kinda of love. Treat everyone as equal as possible. Remember these kids might have kids. And what if they alienate u and your hubby bc they felt u really were the evil stepmonster not really something to joke abt.
Anonymous
by Anonymous - Original Poster on Jun. 30, 2013 at 7:51 PM
Obviously! Which is my issue because it is my home and like I said its hard explaining why they can do things my dd can't or when I get onto her for doing the same thing they did. Since they aren't my kids and I should back off does that mean I no longer have to clean up after them, do their laundry, cook, or watch them while dh works?

Quoting Anonymous:

Not your kids, back off!
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