My husband choked me a month ago and I stopped talking to him after I moved the kids and myself out of the apartment we were staying in. After that I found out that he had been having an affair since april with the current girls he's seeing now. Well sunday morning at about 1am I get off work early and I call him because he wanted to talk. I stopped by our old apartment to talk to him, and we ended up having sex. I felt nothing sexually or connection wise but I missed him because technically he's still my husband. Well he asked me to stay the night but I told him I couldnt. I just started seeing someone and I had invited him to go out to dinner sunday evening. Well he looked hurt but he was fine, he told me goodbye and I left. Well he text me asking if I would stop by his house before my dinner date because there was some more things we needed to talk about. I told him I wasnt because we would end up having sex again and we have people to worry about hurting including our kids.
Well during the texting he informs me that he wants and misses me, he doesnt love or want her but he doesnt want to hurt her by just leaving her alone to be back with me. So I told him ok, no problem try to make things work with her and sign the divorce papers. He told me he didnt want too because he was still in love with me and wanted us to work it out. So I end up not going on my dinner date because I was called into work. While im at work I call him because he said he wanted to talk. He didnt answer so I text him and tell him I'm going to call him on my lunch so he can tell me whatever he needed to finish telling me. He response back saying "not a good time, going out to eat. Can't talk now." I was hurt because all the time we were laying with each other he was wanting me to stay and not leave, but then he tells me he doesnt want to hurt her but he chooses to work things out with me, and now he's out with her and not wanting to talk to me. I'm so hurt and confused because I thought we were going to try marriage counseling and work things out for the kids. But now I feel stupid because I let my guard down and believed everything he was saying but in reality he slept with me for his own enjoyment. Because we are separated and he choked me he cant see the kids because CPS wont allow him too, and he's about to get evicted(I was paying the rent our whole lease before I moved out), he has no car, and has to pay a bail bondsman because of the domestic violence case against him. And him getting back with me would make most of his problems go away.
I cried all day today at work because of my stupidity. And allowing him to get the best of me again. I do still love my husband and wanted us to work out but I cant compete with another woman. Him not wanting to hurt her is hurting me. I think he really wants his cake and ice cream and thats the reason he doesnt want to divorce me.