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Judge Me If You Must, But Check Your Imperfections At The Door First

Posted by Anonymous   + Show Post

We just moved over 1000 miles from home. So I have no sitters, there are no drop in daycare centers, DH works from pretty early in the AM til the evening, I have no family nearby to help me.  My oldest DS is 12.  He is amazing with his baby sister, very protective. 

Last week we went to town (25 mile drive one way) to run errands.  DD fell asleep (she is 2.5).  I had one last errand to run that I couldn't just do the next day, or later in the afternoon, since the drive is so long.  We are in temp housing til our house sells so it isn't exactly ideal.  I had planned to go to Target.  We needed laundry detergent, and some more laundry baskets.  We were completely out, and the mountain was growing.  DH was going to be working late. 

My DD is a temper tantrum thrower, my boys (both much older than her) never threw tantrums.  She ALWAYS throws tantrums in the store.  It's inevitable. But to wake her and take her into a store?  Well you may as well start world war 3.  So I found the nearest Dollar Store.  Pulled into a parking space at the very front, told DS to text me from his phone if need be, locked the doors, air on, windows up, emergency brake on, DS sitting in the front seat so it didn't look like an empty car just sitting there running.  I ran inside, bee lined for the laundry aisle, got what I needed and got in line and waited.  I could see my car and children clearly from where I was.  All was good. Not even 5 minutes had passed.

Enter Crazy Lady...  This very loud lady with her child (he appeared to be about 8) comes barreling in the store. She is screaming at the top of her lungs "OH MY GOD SOMEONE LEFT THEIR SMALL KIDS ALONE IN A CAR OUT THERE. WHOSE CAR IS THAT???????  THERE IS A BABY ALONE IN THAT CAR, THERE ARE CHILDREN LOCKED IN THAT HOT CAR"  She continues, and it took me a minute to realize that she was talking about me, because 1) I have a 35" tall toddler, and a 12 year old.  2) The car was running and the air was on and 3) well I don't consider 12 being small. 

I tried to assure her that my DS was nearly a teenager and quite capable of keeping his sleeping sister for a few moments and she just became louder and more irate.  She called me a liar and a negligent mother.

Now... According to the American Red Cross. children as young as 11 can become certified babysitters.  There is a program in the town we live in for "junior life guarders" and it starts at 11 yrs old.  At church children the age of 12 can volunteer in the nursery. 

I wasn't in Wal-Mart, Target or a bar.  I wasn't goofing off. I was in and out in less than 10 minutes (which would have been less had she not caused the entire store to freak out and stop working for a few minutes.)

She ended up calling the cops, I told her to write down my tag number as I pulled out and they could come to my house and question me, but I wouldn't allow her to upset my kids.  Since clearly she didn't care if she was upsetting her own child, why would she care if she upset mine? 

I got to my car, DD was still snoozing, DS unlocked the door, crawled in the back, buckled up and not a word was mentioned.  I gave him some cookies that I had snagged at the front for being such a responsible helper with his sister, and I never heard another word about it. 

So....  Has your older DS or DD watched your youngers for you?  Did this lady over react?  Or am I truly negligent and just don't realze it?


Posted by Anonymous on Jul. 1, 2013 at 2:14 PM
Replies (11-20):
by on Jul. 1, 2013 at 2:21 PM

I think leaving the 12 year old with the baby for 3 minutes with the car running is fine.  Had you left a 5 year old and a 2 year old alone in the car, I would call you negligent...But 12 year olds can legally stay home alone in most states.

by Brandi on Jul. 1, 2013 at 2:22 PM
I have 3 kids. All too small to be left unattended. I look forward to the day they are 12 and can wait 2 min for me to run in and pick stuff up quick.
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by on Jul. 1, 2013 at 2:22 PM
At his age. He's fine. I wouldn't have woken her either. Mine both go in with me asleep or no, but they are 2 & 4. A little different.
by Anonymous 1 - Original Poster on Jul. 1, 2013 at 2:23 PM
This isn't a big store, very little. I could see them almost the entire time.
Quoting -_-:

I wouldn't have my kids stay in the car when I'm going into a big store. It's not just about how responsible the older is with the younger... people are crazy. Not a risk I would take.

by Race Mom on Jul. 1, 2013 at 2:23 PM

Quoting dalbax2:

She over reacted in my opinion.   I would have told her to F*** off.

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by on Jul. 1, 2013 at 2:24 PM

if he can be at home alone with her while you go to the store, IDK why being in the car is worse.  If it wasn't too hot, that is...

by Anonymous 3 on Jul. 1, 2013 at 2:25 PM
I pulled into a nice hotel once to pee and locked my kids in the car and paid the bell boy $5 to keep an eye on the car. It's nice to have minute to run in somewhere alone!
by Anonymous 4 on Jul. 1, 2013 at 2:25 PM
Not in the car alone... It takes less than 10 minutes for a child to pass in a car... A 12 yr old is t certified to know if a toddler suffers from heat exhaustion, heat stroke or dehydration... I wouldn't have gone crazy like that...
by Silver Member on Jul. 1, 2013 at 2:26 PM
2 moms liked this

You did nothing wrong....

by Silver Member on Jul. 1, 2013 at 2:26 PM

my children are almost 3 and 17 months so they are always with me even if I can see the car, I dont take a chance. BUT when I was younger my mom would leave me in the car as young as 10. I dont see a problem if he is mature enough and the doors were locked etc.

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