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Something to think about for those of you who 'just know'......

Posted by Anonymous
  • 23 Replies

A friend of mine has a 16yr old daughter. Her daughter is a beauty, very intelligent, cheerleader, honor student, volunteers with the special needs kids in her school, and is liked by almost everyone.

My friend 'just knew' her daughter wasn't having sex. They have an extremely open relationship and talk about everything. My friend has talked to her DD about sex since she was 12.

I would always say "you never truly know" and she would insist(like so many moms on here) that she knew without a doubt that her DD wasn't having sex, she didn't have the time, opportunity, and if she were she would know about it.

Well, this past weekend her DD confided in me that she was in fact sexually active. She has a boyfriend(mom knows about this)and they have had sex several times. I talked to her for a long time about sex, the consequences(not only physical but the emotional side too) and made sure they were using protection. She assured me that they had used condoms and she had just been to health department and gotten her bc.

Her mother still doesn't know she is sexually active. And I don't feel it is my place to tell her. She confided in me, she is being safe about it, and I know how betrayed I would have felt if her mother(who is the one I told the first time I had sex) would have gone to my mother and told her.

So, this just goes to show you. You can say it all you want to make yourself feel better, but you truly never 'know' that your teen isn't sexually active.

Posted by Anonymous on Jul. 3, 2013 at 10:40 AM
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Replies (1-10):
by on Jul. 3, 2013 at 10:49 AM
1 mom liked this

 That's so true--you can only teach them the best way you know how, and pray they make the right choices...

by Stacey on Jul. 3, 2013 at 10:50 AM

 I agree. Some parents are so naive when it comes to their teens having sex.

by Anonymous 2 on Jul. 3, 2013 at 10:51 AM
If you were truly her friend you would tell her that her dd is having sex.

She needs to know.
by Anonymous 3 on Jul. 3, 2013 at 10:51 AM
I agree you can never know for sure. My mom use to say I was not sexually active and she would know if I were blah blah blah I WAS sexually active and my mom never knew ...
by Anonymous 4 on Jul. 3, 2013 at 10:52 AM

You are never know for certain.

by Anonymous 5 on Jul. 3, 2013 at 10:53 AM
Yes, I agree don't talk to her mother about this. She trusts you enough to tell you. You should ask her if she would like you to support her while she tells her mother, because it should come from her. Teenagers these days need someone else they trust to talk to & it's a good thing you were there & supported her.
by on Jul. 3, 2013 at 10:54 AM

You are can never say you are 100% sure.   My dd just turned 16.  I am however 99.5% sure that she is not sexually active.   Not because she assures me she isn't. But because of how she talks about her friends that are.   

by Platinum Member on Jul. 3, 2013 at 10:54 AM

Oh please! I don't buy this for a second! What makes you think its appropriate to talk to someone else's kid about sex?? There's no way she would just come out with that info to HER MOM's friend if she didn't want her mom to know.

by on Jul. 3, 2013 at 10:55 AM
by the sauce is boss on Jul. 3, 2013 at 10:56 AM
My Aunt knew i was, and kept secret from My mom. I got pregnant at 16.
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