Join the Meeting Place for Moms!
Talk to other moms, share advice, and have fun!

(minimum 6 characters)

Mom Confessions Mom Confessions

Trying to convince myself marriage is not for me

Anonymous
Posted by Anonymous
  • 84 Replies

Can anyone help make me feel better by giving me words of wisdom on how better it is just to be a mother and loving gf without the necessity of marriage? My bf wants to marry me but I'm having a change of heart. I've drawn up power of attorney papers for healthcare cause that's all that really matters to me is us having says for each other in case of an emergency. He told me it would be so much easier if we were married. I didn't respond. He's been married before and I never was. On our second date which was 2 years ago(that's how long we've been together) he told me he didn't want to get married anymore. The only thing he wanted to change for me was my address. Now after a few months down the line and around the time we planned to have a baby, he changed his mind. Not because I w3as pregnant but because his love for me became much more stronger. But I still have the thought in my mind of his descision in the beginning of not wanting marriage. I'm not a vindictive person like his exes, wanted money out of him/cheated. I have a son from my ex and I'm too accustomed to being a single mom. I once did wanted marriage but when I think about it, all that matters (to me) is that we can make desicions for each other in case of a medical emergency. My dad's a JW(Jehovahs witness) and if something bad were to happen to me(before kids are 18) he's my next of kin(mom's passed). Blood transfusion, my dad would let me die cause he doesn't go for that.

Anyhoo, just a little sad but if someone could tell me marriage isn't all that, pros of staying legally single(no cons please) then I'll be happy. Btw the kids are protected on my life and medical insurance.

Posted by Anonymous on Jul. 8, 2013 at 10:08 PM
Add your quick reply below:
You must be a member to reply to this post.
Replies (1-10):
Anonymous
by Anonymous - Original Poster on Jul. 8, 2013 at 10:15 PM

Or a good book to read regarding just being happy and satisfied having kids and no need for marriage.

Val99
by Ruby Member on Jul. 8, 2013 at 10:18 PM
3 moms liked this

Family can go to court to oppose any power of attorney.  They may not win, but by the time they lose the window of opportunity to have your wishes met may have lapsed.  I would never settle for being unmarried when i am truly in love with and committed to another person.

Anonymous
by Anonymous on Jul. 8, 2013 at 10:18 PM
Sorry, my marriage is amazing. I would never settle for being a lifetime girlfriend.
ashley9603
by RunningMomma on Jul. 8, 2013 at 10:19 PM

In my opinion if you have to ask for pros and cons or you feel you just dont want to be married,I would hold off until you are sure.

Amybelle
by AmyAzing on Jul. 8, 2013 at 10:21 PM

<-----Happliy Married almost 29 yrs and going STRONG (5 amazing children too!) 

Marriage IS all that AND a bag of Chips

mysticgrl
by on Jul. 8, 2013 at 10:25 PM

I think marriage sux and I love my freedom now. If ur happy as u are now...more power to u   U said u have to be married?>

 

 

Anonymous
by Anonymous - Original Poster on Jul. 9, 2013 at 4:32 AM

Guess that didn't help. I assume there's more married moms on this site than single. :(

Anonymous
by Anonymous - Original Poster on Jul. 9, 2013 at 4:34 AM

 

Quoting mysticgrl:

I think marriage sux and I love my freedom now. If ur happy as u are now...more power to u   U said u have to be married?>

 

 

 People are saying as if you must be married not just for love but to legally protect the kids. Well how much more protection do they need when a parent has good health and life insurance for the kids?

Anonymous
by Anonymous - Original Poster on Jul. 9, 2013 at 4:35 AM

 

Quoting ashley9603:

In my opinion if you have to ask for pros and cons or you feel you just dont want to be married,I would hold off until you are sure.

 Maybe I don't want to at all. If things are going well in my relationship now, why change?

jamamama00
by Platinum Member on Jul. 9, 2013 at 4:36 AM
1 mom liked this
I'm confused. Why do you want to stay single?
Add your quick reply below:
You must be a member to reply to this post.
Join the Meeting Place for Moms!
Talk to other moms, share advice, and have fun!

(minimum 6 characters)