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Mom Confessions Mom Confessions

I kicked my daughter out. update UPDATE AGAIN

Anonymous
Posted by Anonymous
  • 261 Replies
10 moms liked this

I have 2 daughters a 16 year old and a 19 year old. The 19 year old has been living with us while she goes to college. It hasnt been easy with her since she turned 18. It is almost a weekly struggle with her because she keeps wanting her boyfriend to spend the night. I tell her no it is against our rules and also it is not good for her younger sister. My 16 year old has even asked if she could have her bf spend the night. It has just been causing problems

Well on sunday morning I was up really early (about 4 am) and I could not get to sleep. I was watching tv on the couch and trying to get back to sleep when all of a sudden my 19* year olds bf walks out of her room. He was sneaking out! 

I ran in my daughters room and woke her up and asked wtf was going on. She told me she had snuck him in a few times and that she was an adult and was able to make her own decisions. So I told her she was right she WAS an adult and it was time for her to move out of my house. She thought I was joking. I got some trashbags, brought them to her room, and told her she needed to be out before he dad wakes up.

Many people will think "what is the big deal?" I dont care if she has a boyfriend he is actually a sweet guy but it is our rule that there will be no bfs spending the night in our house. She has caused constant problems with us about it. She fights us every single weekend about it. Her little sister thinks it is perfectly okay to have boys spend the night and is even asking if her bf could do it. 

When she turned 18 and decided to still live with us we set up the rules. We had a contract of what we were responsible for and what she was responsible for and the rules that needed to be followed. She signed it and agreed to follow them so I kicked her out. If she had followed the rules she could have stayed as long as she wanted. I feel a little bad but not at the same time. She has a job and can afford an apartment. She has even been looking into getting one. Her father was pissed off when he found out and her bf was lucky he wasnt around because my DH would have had very strong words with him. 

I thought I would update this: We went apartment hunting last night and DD found one she really likes. She filled out an application and because she has good credit they told her that she should have no issue getting it. Hopefully in the next couple hours we will get the phone call and after she is done signing the paperwork DH and I will help her move her things over and settle in. 


Update2: My dd got the apartment. We packed up her bed, dresser, and all the other big stuff and got them unloaded at her new place. It really is cute. It is a one bedroom with an "office". She is still getting settled in. 

Posted by Anonymous on Jul. 9, 2013 at 10:49 AM
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Replies (1-10):
Decemberlov
by Gold Member on Jul. 9, 2013 at 10:51 AM
12 moms liked this

Don't feel bad mama. Your house your rules!

Devious333
by Ruby Member on Jul. 9, 2013 at 10:52 AM
3 moms liked this
She should have respected your rules.
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sweetnsassymami
by Ruby Member on Jul. 9, 2013 at 10:53 AM
13 moms liked this

I would have given her some time to find a living arrangement. I'd never kick my kid out on the street. I do agree that she needs to abide by the rules of the house or move out on her own though. I just couldn't see me kicking my kid out on the street. Does she have somewhere to go? Also you probably destroyed whatever relationship you hoped to have with her,at least for a while. I think you reacted instead of going about it level headed but your house, your kid.

Anonandon
by on Jul. 9, 2013 at 10:53 AM

She should have followed the rules.

Anonymous
by Anonymous 2 on Jul. 9, 2013 at 10:54 AM
1 mom liked this

I don't blame you. the only thing i would have done differently is give her a deadline to get out..and not kick her out on the spot. atleast give her a day or two. 

Anonymous
by Anonymous 1 - Original Poster on Jul. 9, 2013 at 10:54 AM

She stayed with her bf. 

This is what I would have done if she broke any of the rules. 

Quoting sweetnsassymami:

I would have given her some time to find a living arrangement. I'd never kick my kid out on the street. I do agree that she needs to abide by the rules of the house or move out on her own though. I just couldn't see me kicking my kid out on the street. Does she have somewhere to go? Also you probably destroyed whatever relationship you hoped to have with her,at least for a while. I think you reacted instead of going about it level headed but your house, your kid.



mommy_me
by ~The Three B's~ on Jul. 9, 2013 at 10:54 AM
12 moms liked this
You kicked her out at 4 in the morning with seemingly no where to go.


What the hell is wrong with you?
Anonymous
by Anonymous 1 - Original Poster on Jul. 9, 2013 at 10:55 AM
3 moms liked this

She stayed with her bf. (which she does occasionally anyway) 

She shouldnt have snuck him into my house


Quoting mommy_me:

You kicked her out at 4 in the morning with seemingly no where to go.


What the hell is wrong with you?



kagegirl
by on Jul. 9, 2013 at 10:56 AM

And they couldn't stay at the BF's house why??? Does he not have his own place? Frankly, I think you did right. I would have been meaner about it, but I am evil

kgsharber
by Gold Member on Jul. 9, 2013 at 10:56 AM
2 moms liked this
Pick and choose your battles. This will cause her to have to get her own pace and possibly quit school. I can't believe you can't talk about this rationally and figure something out.
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