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UPDATE: UPDATE !!!!!!My husband will not let me circumsize my son.....we are really having it out over this

Posted by Anonymous   + Show Post


UPDATE: We went to pedi and I did some research and we both decided that it would not be done. Why? Well, Not because so many people on here were rude (by the way thanks to those who had cosntructive views and understood my issues) but because he does feel strongly about it and he does understand the Penis more than I do plus my pedi said that either way is okay and that there is really no reason to do it if you do not want to. All I wanted was to be heard and for this to be a both parent decision and for us to make this decision together since we made this child together. So its not happening and i am okay with that. But we were both heard.


My husband and I are about to have out first son in 3 weeks. We have 2 dd so it has never came up. He is Australian and his excuse for it is that he wasnt and none of his brothers were and neither was his dad. He also said that it was not done in his country or by his family so I should respect his wishes because it is his son.  Well, its my son too and we live in the United States and it is done on a regular bases here. I am sorry but I just feel it would be unsanitary for us not to circumsize him. I also do not think its fair he has made this decision and i have to live with it and his whole argument is it is his son. I am thinking about just having them do it while he is gone. I mean he will not be with me at the hospital 24/7 and once its gone....well oh well, he cant glue it back on. I really honestly would not do that but it serves him right if I did.


Let me reinstate the main  reason I am upset is he acts like I have no say what so ever. My husband is not unsanitary bit its a lot harder to keep clean and he even admits that.


EDIT: Wow I guess i was wrong to think anyone on here would understand that it is just a bit hurtful that he thinks I have no say so what so ever it what is done to my son and thats why i would be upset.  Just so you know I would not do it behind his back and even stated I would not in my post.

UPDATE: MY husband and I talked it through he did not realize my main problem was how he would not even talk about it. We are going to meet with our pedi today and talk about it.  I doubt we will do it but at least we will talk it through. that is what i wanted.

Posted by Anonymous on Jul. 9, 2013 at 10:16 PM
Replies (31-40):
turtlesquish23
by on Jul. 9, 2013 at 10:28 PM
1 mom liked this
It's not unsanitary or hard to take care of. research it. I'm with your dh
Anonymous
by Anonymous 8 on Jul. 9, 2013 at 10:28 PM
3 moms liked this
Hmmmmm, I like your husband. He seems to be am intelligent man
wolfybaby
by Silver Member on Jul. 9, 2013 at 10:29 PM
1 mom liked this

both you and your husband need to change your perspectives and realize that it is neither of your choices to or to not circumcise your son. just because he has the opinion to not circumcise [which generally "wins" in these arguments for the sole reason that circumcision cannot be undone], doesnt make him the winner and you the loser. its just coincidence that he agrees with the fact that circumcision is wrong. i hope you change your perspective to match his. he should know, anyways, he has a foreskin. why take that away from your son when you know perfectly well how sanitary and clean it can be with, you know, bathing!

Quoting Anonymous:

Its not about that. Its about the fact he thinks I have no say.


Quoting Aslen:

Also, the rates of circumcision are going WAY DOWN. Your son won't be the only intact boy around.

Lord if you had so many issue with the natural penis, why in the hell did you marry a man from a country that doens't routinely circumcise??




Anonymous
by Anonymous 1 - Original Poster on Jul. 9, 2013 at 10:29 PM


Yeah you were right. I guess I was wrong to think that anyone would understand the main point that the fact he does not want to give me any say so is kind of hurtful and thats the main issue. I would not actually do that behind his back and even stated it in my post.

Quoting Sassy762:

I personally had my boys circumcised

SOOOO I guess it is your decision since you are the one that has carried the child for 40 weeks and will go through labor and delivery. Good Luck with whatever decision you make

This post will probably blow up and not be a pretty sight in a few hours, lol



Aslen
by Ruby Member on Jul. 9, 2013 at 10:31 PM
1 mom liked this

OP, come on.... several of us have asked, yet you don't answer. If your husband is so unsanitary, why are you having sex with him?!


Quoting Anonymous:


Yeah you were right. I guess I was wrong to think that anyone would understand the main point that the fact he does not want to give me any say so is kind of hurtful and thats the main issue. I would not actually do that behind his back and even stated it in my post.

Quoting Sassy762:

I personally had my boys circumcised

SOOOO I guess it is your decision since you are the one that has carried the child for 40 weeks and will go through labor and delivery. Good Luck with whatever decision you make

This post will probably blow up and not be a pretty sight in a few hours, lol





Anonymous
by Anonymous 9 on Jul. 9, 2013 at 10:32 PM
Poor kid, it's not your penis. You aren't the I've living with it, he is. It's possible to be circumcised later in life, just let him choose when he's older. Your going to mitigate your son's genitalia out of spite.
Jamie1972
by Ruby Member on Jul. 9, 2013 at 10:32 PM
1 mom liked this

Both of my sons are circumcised. But even i know that the rates of circing has gone down alot in the usa. So there goes part of your argument. As far as sanitary reasons you can still keep it clean sheesh. Ask your dh how he does it. But what the real problem is his lack of taking your feelings into consideration. You both need to sit diwn after you both do research on why ds shoukd be circed or not. and hopefully you both will come to an agreement. But the hes my son is the weakest argument for staying intact.

Matthea
by Bronze Member on Jul. 9, 2013 at 10:33 PM
5 moms liked this
It would 'serve him right'??? You're not chopping the hair off your sister's dolly or something, you're talking about amputating part of a healthy, functioning organ! On a human being, who doesn't consent to having it done! What the hell is wrong with you?!

Do you realise how fucking disgusting it sounds to many of us who read this? Maybe you'll get some idea if it's put another way:

"My wife will NOT let me have my daughter's clitoral hood cut off, we're really all up in a tizzy over it! I'm from Central Africa, heaps of babies and girls have it done to them here. I think I'll just get it done while my wife's away - not like it'll grow back, haha!"

Oh, and you 'just feel it would be unsanitary'? Try less feeling and more THINKING. Hmm, let's see, an intact healthy body part, or an open wound exposed daily to urine and faeces? That's a toughie! Ugh.
Anonymous
by Anonymous 1 - Original Poster on Jul. 9, 2013 at 10:33 PM


I answered you. I dont think my husband is unsanitary. I just do not think its fair that the only point for not doing it is because he said so and its his son. Is that fair?

Quoting Aslen:

OP, come on.... several of us have asked, yet you don't answer. If your husband is so unsanitary, why are you having sex with him?!


Quoting Anonymous:


Yeah you were right. I guess I was wrong to think that anyone would understand the main point that the fact he does not want to give me any say so is kind of hurtful and thats the main issue. I would not actually do that behind his back and even stated it in my post.

Quoting Sassy762:

I personally had my boys circumcised

SOOOO I guess it is your decision since you are the one that has carried the child for 40 weeks and will go through labor and delivery. Good Luck with whatever decision you make

This post will probably blow up and not be a pretty sight in a few hours, lol







ceckyl
by Gold Member on Jul. 9, 2013 at 10:34 PM
4 moms liked this
Smart man. Maybe your husband finds it hurtful that you would want to mutilate your sons genitals for no reason.
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