He has 3 adult children and we have a 17 month old together. He told me today he does not want more children because "he has enough". I want at least one more. I am devastated. I at least wanted a daughter. I feel like I am grieving for a child that never existed. For what could have been. It's not fair because he knows how I feel and he does not want more because he has kids with his ex.
To make things worse, in my state I can't get a doctor to give me a hysterectomy or tie my tubes because I have only had one child. He told me he will not get fixed. I am nowhere near menopause.
So I feel like I have to live with the possibility of it knowing he does not want it instead of him just getting rid of the possibility and letting me grieve and move on with my life.
I think it is selfish and am having a hard time trying to talk him into it.
Honestly, we use the pull out method (technical term?). What are the chances seriously that I won't get pregnant in 10, 15 years? (in 15 years he will be 58.)