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So SICK of people telling me to get a divorce!

Posted by Anonymous
  • 61 Replies

My husband and I are in a rough patch. He is not abusive, he is not a loser, he is not cheating, he does not yell at me, he has never called me a bad name... but we have a very shitty sex life and he wont go get seen by a DR. That in turn makes me wonder if he cheats. He doesnt. I have followed him and even put a program on his phone to send me messages, browser info and basically shows me everything he does (even tracks where he is). He has not lied to me about where he has been and I do not think he has cheated. My friends had me utterly CONVINCED of this, which made me more mad at him and made things worse.

He is suffering from depression as a result of low T. He had this problem in the past and took over the counter pills to help, and it did help a lot.

I feel like my friends are instigating the issues we have. I really believed everything they were saying for a long time about him (even though they dont even know him), and I mindlessly took their advice because I was desperate.

Now, my husband and I had a "Come to God" talk with each other about marriage, divorce, the kids, what would happen if I left him, if he loves me etc... We decided we still very much love each other, and besides the romance our relationship is fine. The relationship issues all stem from one thing, and we are trying to fix it. He is making a good effort. I am not a stupid woman. I think its something we can fix. My friends are all pissed at me for not leaving him now and telling me I am a door mat. I dont get why they all want me to leave him so bad. I havent dogged him and said he is a bad man. 



Its three people who know about the situation. I dont talk about it to everyone, just my three closest friends.

Posted by Anonymous on Jul. 19, 2013 at 8:21 PM
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Replies (1-10):
by Anonymous 1 - Original Poster on Jul. 19, 2013 at 8:23 PM


by Anonymous 2 on Jul. 19, 2013 at 8:25 PM
3 moms liked this

Stop talking to your friends about your relationship and problems with your relationship.

by HAIL NUGGY! on Jul. 19, 2013 at 8:25 PM
2 moms liked this

Ditch the friends, save the marriage.

Since you let outsiders dictate the course of your marriage and influence your thoughts, clearly you need to get rid of them and learn how to cut past the bullshit on your own.

by on Jul. 19, 2013 at 8:25 PM
Get new friends. They obviously don't want you to be happy, if they know you figured out he is not cheating and still telling you to leave.
by Anonymous 3 on Jul. 19, 2013 at 8:25 PM

SEX is very important to me and if I couldn't get him hard I would seriously think about having an affair.  Every mother is different.  

by Bronze Member on Jul. 19, 2013 at 8:27 PM

Maybe try counseling to see if it helps, but he def needs to have medication for low T if it's affecting even just him so bad. Kids will pick up on it (not sure their age and how much it would affect them) and it's affecting the marriage. Good luck

by on Jul. 19, 2013 at 8:27 PM

I can relate.

PM if you want to really talk about this.  I might be able to offer some insight, but not here in this group.

by on Jul. 19, 2013 at 8:28 PM

You need to stop listening to your friends..  

by Ruby Member on Jul. 19, 2013 at 8:28 PM

I would ignore what other people say and do what is best for me and my dh. I would, stop suspecting him of cheating since you know there is a real medical issue.  He is trying and you are trying. You are able to make the decision for yourself. IGNORE them.  People don't get that people can work through some pretty deep marital problems if BOTH parties wish to. My dh and I have come through some hard things, most people would have divorced over. We will now be married 14 years in October.  We are determined to make it work and do what it takes to make it work.

by Silver Member on Jul. 19, 2013 at 8:28 PM

well brush urself off and STOP TELLING PPL all  UR DANG BUSINESS...

 HE SOUNDS LIKE HE needs your love..good luck to you

BF mama to 4...Ivy-Rose 9 Arwinn 7 Lily-Anna 2 and Clara 10 months old. ~~~~~
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