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Mom Confessions Mom Confessions

He thinks I'm fat!!!!!! Update....

Anonymous
Posted by Anonymous
  • 223 Replies
DH took me out to dinner last night. He said we needed to talk seriously about some things. We've always been great at communicating our feelings so this wasn't unusual.

When we went out he told me he often thinks about having sex with other women. I was taken back. Then he went into my weight - I'm 237lbs, 5'8. When we met I wasn't like that.

He's tried doing activities with me to help lose - like evening walks and suggestions for healthier dinners. But, I never took him seriously.

Basically, he's told me that I have to lose the weight to save our marriage. He said he's willing to pay for any services to assist - he suggested weight watchers and a gym membership but he's doesn't care. He said if I need special meals, trainers, whatever I think is best - he'll do it. He said he's willing to walk every step with me.

I'm just taken back. WTF? Who says they want to have sex with someone else? Who does that? I'm so hurt. I thought we had the perfect marriage. I guess not.

UPDATE. I can't believe how many responses this has gotten. I am @ work mobile but thought I'd add a few details.

I am a mother of four. That means my body has bounced back and forth FOUR times within the past six years. That's a LOT.

Secondly, DH is no super model either. When I met him, he was overweight - 6ft, 300lbs overweight. I am much younger than him as well.

I'm shocked at how many people feel what he said was okay. I may take him up on the help - but who knows? I might want to sleep with someone skinnier also

Oh, and its not like I've gained a trillion pounds. I weighed 170 with a very athletic build when we met.
Posted by Anonymous on Jul. 23, 2013 at 11:02 AM
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Replies (1-10):
Anonymous
by Anonymous on Jul. 23, 2013 at 11:04 AM
13 moms liked this

at least he is being honest with you and he is willing to take every step with you to make it work.

momoftwo0406
by Ruby Member on Jul. 23, 2013 at 11:07 AM
4 moms liked this
He may have been to blunt with the way he said it but its better he said it then let it ruin your marriage. Get fit and healthy so you have a longer life with him.
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meg978
by on Jul. 23, 2013 at 11:07 AM
2 moms liked this

A true man would love you not matter ur shape or size. Do the special k diet it is cheep and good for you. if u want message me and i will explain.

If u truly want to make him happy. He should have not said anything. Maybe you should talk to him and work it out.

Anonymous
by Anonymous on Jul. 23, 2013 at 11:08 AM
2 moms liked this

I agree with the PP.  Honesty is always the best policy.  Don't be hurt by his honesty.  It doesn't sound like he was trying to be rude, just upfront about what he finds sexually arousing...and he wants you to be the one he finds arousing.  

Not to be rude, but if you were one size when you two got together, doesn't it go without saying that he found you attractive then, he probably won't find you as attractive with unnecessary pounds added to you??

j3st3r
by Jedi on Jul. 23, 2013 at 11:08 AM
2 moms liked this

So, his only concern about your weight is that he thinks about other women?  It doesn't sound like your weight is the problem.

Suppose you lose weight and he's still attracted to other women.  What next, plastic surgery?

It sounds like you both need counseling.

Anonymous
by Anonymous - Original Poster on Jul. 23, 2013 at 11:09 AM
He said, 'I wasn't catching any of his hints.' So, I guess I'm supposed to be a mind reader too.


Quoting momoftwo0406:

He may have been to blunt with the way he said it but its better he said it then let it ruin your marriage. Get fit and healthy so you have a longer life with him.

2Sparrows4ever
by on Jul. 23, 2013 at 11:09 AM
The problem isn't your weight gain, I am sorry
Anonymous
by Anonymous - Original Poster on Jul. 23, 2013 at 11:10 AM
Why do I need counselling? It's not like I'm obese!


Quoting j3st3r:

So, his only concern about your weight is that he thinks about other women?  It doesn't sound like your weight is the problem.

Suppose you lose weight and he's still attracted to other women.  What next, plastic surgery?

It sounds like you both need counseling.


Anonymous
by Anonymous on Jul. 23, 2013 at 11:10 AM
3 moms liked this

Well, you are fat.  At least he approached you about it and wants to help you instead of just cheating on you.  

Anonymous
by Anonymous on Jul. 23, 2013 at 11:10 AM
3 moms liked this
Give him credit for being honest, and not just going out and having sex with other people. You yourself said he has been trying other methods/messages to tell/help you but you did ot take him seriously.
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