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I watched my brother in law...

Anonymous
Posted by Anonymous
  • 12 Replies

I watched my brother in law throw my pregnant sister around. He was significantly drunk and is a big guy. He was pushing her around and slammed her against the car. I tried to intervene and he then got in my face. They have a 16month old who I was trying to shield from all the craziness. My problem is he is an officer and I talked to another officer and he said basically to turn my head and leave it alone. My sister doesn't want to do anything about it but act as if it didn't happen. My parents are acting as if it didn't happen but I am having a very hard time turning a blind eye to this. I talked to my husband and my husband wants to kick his ass. I don't want to solve it with more violence. I am just VERY shook and really don't know what to do. I will NEVER be able to look at him the same, I will NEVER let him be around my kids. My sister wants me to mind my own, HELP!!!

Posted by Anonymous on Jul. 24, 2013 at 1:21 AM
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Replies (1-10):
Anonymous
by Anonymous 1 - Original Poster on Jul. 24, 2013 at 3:18 AM

BUMP!

Wheepingchree
by on Jul. 24, 2013 at 3:21 AM
That's really terrible. She's in denial. Unfortunately there's nothing you can do, but be there when she asks, unless she WANTS the help and can come to terms with that NOT being okay.
Anonymous
by Anonymous 2 on Jul. 24, 2013 at 3:22 AM

I hate to tell you this, but as long as your family(your sister included) are in denial there is nothing you can do. Lets say you report it all she is going to do is deny it and get mad at you for not minding your own business. Not sure how it works in your area but in mine the police department looks out for its own so good luck with trying to make any type of accusations or press charges especially if his wife will take his side.  For your own safety and the wellbeing of your family (immediate family) I would stay out of it and just be there when your sister is ready to leave him. Sorry thats the best advice I could give you given the circumstances. Good luck.

BellaByrdie
by Platinum Member on Jul. 24, 2013 at 3:22 AM
1 mom liked this

If you see it again RECORD IT.  Get that shit on tape.  So when your sister wakes the hell up.  There is a record of it. 

Sassy762
by CAFE SASSY HBIC on Jul. 24, 2013 at 3:25 AM
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Until she is ready to address this unfortunately there is nothing you can do except be there for her when and if she is ready to leave this situation...smdh

bonitalilmama
by on Jul. 24, 2013 at 3:25 AM

I can't stand the fact that people are cops they get away with a lot of stuff and I can't believe your parents are acting like it never happened, my mom would of been ready to hit my SO in the head if he put his hands on me. Evidently they scared of him as well. You DH should approach him about it but not kick his ass though, I could only imagine your DH getting arrested instead because your brother inlaw is a cop smh

Anonymous
by Anonymous 3 on Jul. 24, 2013 at 3:30 AM

 I would at least just offer your sister and your niece or nephew a place to stay at your house that night when he is drunk so he can sleep it off. That way if it's just a drunken stuporshe won't be harmed. If he tries to come to your home during that time have family or your husband steer him in a different direction, bar or back to their your bil/sister's home and not by violence but by communicating. If he is doing it sober again I would just offer your sister a safe place to stay. It is up to her to get out of that vicious cycle.  

Megzboys
by on Jul. 24, 2013 at 3:32 AM

  She can not expect you to turn a blind eye to that when it is happening right in front of you!   She is pregnant also and this should not be allowed to go on. He needs to be punished for that!   Shame on him for even letting himself looose control and beat her like that.   Somebody needs to stop it and maybe your husband can talk with him alone somewhere, and your sister needs to deal with the fact that her baby is in danger because of this man.  

Grumpylilpixy
by on Jul. 24, 2013 at 3:38 AM

Next time it happens , record it. take copies of it . Send it to the chief privately. 

He will possibly lose his job over it. But it could come down to burying your sister.

I am a friend, a wife,a daughter but the best title I have by far is Mother .













Anonymous
by Anonymous 1 - Original Poster on Jul. 24, 2013 at 3:39 AM


I too have a hard time with how he can just get away with it. I want to be there for her but it is difficult not just because she is my sister but because I was in a relationship like that for years. My husband saved me. My husband will be saying something, he is a man and my man at that. He promised me that I would never have to feel the pain I felt when I was in my past relationship. Watching him throw her around like she was nothing was horrible! I know in reality nothing will happen with him but how do I get passed it and move on. 

Quoting bonitalilmama:

I can't stand the fact that people are cops they get away with a lot of stuff and I can't believe your parents are acting like it never happened, my mom would of been ready to hit my SO in the head if he put his hands on me. Evidently they scared of him as well. You DH should approach him about it but not kick his ass though, I could only imagine your DH getting arrested instead because your brother inlaw is a cop smh



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