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How long is too long to wait before saying "I'm sorry"

Anonymous
Posted by Anonymous
  • 20 Replies

So I saw a post in here the other day about parents saying sorry to their kids.  I am an example of a parent that says sorry when I screw up.  Well I lost my cool on my son the other day.  No, I didn't hit him or anything but I yelled...and he was crying...and I probably should have/could have been more adult about it...seeing as how I was the adult.   Don't get me wrong.  He was being a major PITA but he is only 6 and I need to work on keeping my cool better.  I'm working on it...honest. 

So I screwed up.  I made up for it later that night...we played in the sprinkler and other things.  The next day he was super sweet and we cuddled during the time we had that I wasn't at work.  I hate seeing him cry and I know I was a bad mom on Sunday.  He was clearly upset and instead of being the adult I flipped out (granted we were in a car so I couldn't just walk away like I normally would to take a 2 min time out for me).

It's really eating at me.  I want to say sorry.  I want to say, Mommies make mistakes and I shouldn't have yelled and I'm sorry.  I'm working on it.  I want to acknowledge that I was wrong and make sure he knows I love him (yes I have said I love you countless times since then and he has said it back...but I mean I specifically want to put that into the apology).  But  DH says he has probably forgotton about it and to bring it up would either confuse him or be just selfish of me...apologizing to assauage my own guilt about it.

Do you think he has forgotton?  Should I just let it go and work on my issue for next time?  Should I bring it up and apologize (3 days later?).  I wanted to apologize earlier than this but for whatever reason (I know, excuses are non-excusable) it never seemed to be the right time and since he didn't seem upset anymore I just figured I could let it go.  How late is too late to apologize.  Will this just confuse him...should I just shut up about it?

Could use some mom advice here.  Thoughts?

Posted by Anonymous on Jul. 24, 2013 at 3:41 AM
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Replies (1-10):
Grumpylilpixy
by on Jul. 24, 2013 at 3:42 AM

I say it right away if I am wrong.

Anonymous
by Anonymous 1 - Original Poster on Jul. 24, 2013 at 3:47 AM

Which is wonderful.  However right away isn't a good option now because right away has passed.  I wish I would have said it right away.  So if I say it now....good or not so good...should I let it go until next time and assume he forgot or bring it up again to apologize again.

Quoting Grumpylilpixy:

I say it right away if I am wrong.


momof3grls4517
by Silver Member on Jul. 24, 2013 at 3:50 AM
I would let it go. He most likely forgot about it.
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sharonsolo
by on Jul. 24, 2013 at 4:09 AM
1 mom liked this
I agree with your Dh on this.
Anonymous
by Anonymous 1 - Original Poster on Jul. 24, 2013 at 4:10 AM

BUMP!

Anonymous
by Anonymous 1 - Original Poster on Jul. 24, 2013 at 4:11 AM

Interesting.  I appreciate the thought ladies.  I have 2 more hours till he wakes up...hopefully I"ll be able to make a decision by then.


1plustwinsmommy
by on Jul. 24, 2013 at 4:13 AM
1 mom liked this
I would tell him you are sorry for losing your temper a few days ago. If he looks at you like he doesn't remember then let it go. He's 6, not 2.
petitekatie
by Platinum Member on Jul. 24, 2013 at 4:16 AM
1 mom liked this

It's NEVER too late to say sorry, as long as it's heartfelt. you are NOT a bad mommy for this. <3

Anonymous
by Anonymous 1 - Original Poster on Jul. 24, 2013 at 5:38 AM

In my profession with all the truely bad mommies I see I know that this is mall potatoes...but I KNOW I should and could be better and knowing I hurt him just breaks my heart.

Quoting petitekatie:

It's NEVER too late to say sorry, as long as it's heartfelt. you are NOT a bad mommy for this. <3


ZennMomma
by Silver Member on Jul. 24, 2013 at 5:44 AM

Just let it go.

remember when you apologize to not make it sound like he wasn't in the wrong. We are people too, I've had some really snappy days, if I end up telling my kids to go to their room because I don't want to see them look out! I do apologize if I'm out of line, I just make sure they understand they need to listen to Me.

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