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Mom Confessions Mom Confessions

Something happened... **EDIT #4 FINAL Post and replies contain cussing

Posted by Anonymous   + Show Post

My daughter is three and goes to preschool.  It's on the small side and seems to be family centered even though it's a center and not an inhome daycare.  Yesterday when I arrived to pick up my daughter, I went downstairs to her classroom.  As I'm going down the stairs I can't hear what is being said but it sounds as if someone is crying.  I figure it's one of the kids.  I get to the bottom of the stairs and find my daughter's teacher on phone and she's crying on the landline phone saying, "Well when do you think you'll be home?"  When she sees me she immediately hangs up and wipes the tears from her eyes.  But, it's too late.  She's been this upset in the middle of the classroom in front of the kids.  My daughter says, "Ms. T is crying mom....Why is she sad?"  At the time, I gave the teacher a hug and asked if there was anything I could do.  She said she was having boyfriend troubles but that he's really a great guy.  As I took my daughter and went to exit the building I saw one of the more senior staff members and I mentioned to her that Ms T was downstairs in tears over a phone conversation she had just had with her boyfriend.  She told me I should talk to the director.  I went and spoke with the director and by the time I got to the car with my daughter, my daughter's teacher had been sent outside to supervise the younger children on the playground.

This happened yesterday and the more I think about it, the more I don't like it. It was a significant enough event that an hour and a half later, it was the first thing my daughter told my husband (her dad) after greeting him when he got home from work even though I didn't mention it between the time it happened and he arrived home.  I want to send the director an email to the effect that in my opinion what happened should have never happened and that it is unprofessional for the teacher to have a personal phone call when she is supposed to be working.  At the least, it was unprofessional for her to be that upset in front of the kids.  She could have gone into the restroom long enough to wrap it up and dry her eyes---The restroom is right in the same room.  The children had no idea what was going on and were so worried about their teacher and I felt badly for them.  If I had another option to be honest, I would probably pull my daughter out.  What would you do?

EDIT:  I have cried at work.  I have had bad days.  BUT, I don't work with children and I keep my personal life out of my work.

EDIT #2  I have been a teacher.  I've also been a teacher with boyfriend problems but none of my students ever knew it because it had nothing to do with them.  From 7-3, my students had my complete attention.  I've cried in front of my older students.  I had 4 kids in my classroom grades, 3,4,7, and 8 when the 9/11 attack happened.  

Also, why do SOME of you think I didn't treat the moment as a teachable moment?  I showed all those kids about compassion by comforting the teacher with a hug and asking her if there was anything I could do.  Of course I talked privately about the situation with my daughter when we got home and I explained that people sometimes make other people cry.  But sometimes people make eachother laugh too.  Her dad also talked to her when he got home and told her to be sure to give her teacher a hug this morning. 

I thought about removing my child from school because the situation didn't happen because the teacher got word of an accident, illness, or death.  It was an argument with her boyfriend.  She was arguing with her boyfriend in front of the kids and she was in tears and the second she saw me, she got off the phone.She knew she shouldn't be on the phone or else she wouldn't have hung up so abruptly. 

EDIT #3  I did not rat the teacher out.  Had I known the director was in the building I would have gone straight to the director but I first saw another teacher.  I told the teacher about what was going on because that teacher didn't have any students and was just cleaning.  I thought maybe the teacher could go down and check on the crying teacher.  It was only after I told the teacher about the crying teacher that I found out the director was in the building and I was told to go talk to her. 

 FINAL EDIT #4

I will not be responding to or editing this post any more.  I get it...I'm a bitch.  I'm two-faced.  I'm a back stabber.  I lack compassion  I'm a busy body/I'm nosy.  I went overboard.  I hold the woman to too high of a standard.  The girl needs a break. 

As a society we have been conditioned to mind our own business and look the other way.  The problem is that when we do that, bad things happen to good people.

 I don't believe I was wrong for alerting the woman's coworkers that she was involved in an emotionally charged situation.  You will never convince me otherwise.

Thank you all for your feedback and a special thank you to those of you who managed to answer my question about what you would have done in the situation and not turn it into a personal attack on me.  Hugs!

Posted by Anonymous on Jul. 24, 2013 at 5:58 PM
Replies (31-40):
Anonymous
by Anonymous 1 - Original Poster on Jul. 24, 2013 at 6:21 PM
1 mom liked this

 


Quoting aiyess:

You are freaking 2 faced. First you go and hug her then to tattle tale on her. What gives? You should be more compassionate.

That's one way to view it or you could look at it that the rest of the teachers were upstairs or outside and couldn't hear what was going on downstairs.  I told the one teacher and the director because I didn't know the director was even there and I told the director because I figured maybe that teacher needed a breather...  I'm not heartless...or two faced.

 

Anonymous
by Anonymous 5 on Jul. 24, 2013 at 6:21 PM
1 mom liked this

Holy crap, nosey much?

ff-princess
by Ruby Member on Jul. 24, 2013 at 6:23 PM
2 moms liked this
well, since you're already spoken to a senior staff member and the director, I would recommend writing a letter to your representative, congressman, and the President. maybe then your concerns over your child seeing someone cry will be taken as seriously as it should be.
Anonymous
by Anonymous 6 on Jul. 24, 2013 at 6:23 PM

Oh lord, you are kidding right? Life is not always pleasant, and it does not hurt for children to see that life is not always peaches and cream. Children are to damn pampered now days.

Anonymous
by Anonymous 7 on Jul. 24, 2013 at 6:24 PM
1 mom liked this

Wow, tried to get your DD's teacher in trouble for crying ONE DAMN TIME.


Freaking drama queen.

mes_deux_amours
by Platinum Member on Jul. 24, 2013 at 6:24 PM

you sound two faced. You comfort her and then tell everyone who will listen? You should have told her to her face that it wasn't ok. I would let it rest unless it continued to happen.

Anonymous
by Anonymous 8 on Jul. 24, 2013 at 6:24 PM
I agree with YOU!!!
I'm so sick of unprofessional people not being held accountable. This country is going to hell in a hand basket because people are either freaking out over stupid piddly stuff such as whether a parent gives their kid candy in a store... To, not doing a thing about something that actually DOES matter when little 3 yr olds are effected BY that unprofessional behavior.

We've all had tough times, but its different when your job influences the innocent. Children are innocent and should be safeguarded as such by others.

Go to the Director! I agree with your post 100%
hautemama83
by Emerald Member on Jul. 24, 2013 at 6:25 PM


Quoting HelloSweetie:

I'd let it go unless its common event, you've already spoken to the higher ups about it

Mommina
by Bronze Member on Jul. 24, 2013 at 6:27 PM
1 mom liked this

 


Quoting Anonymous:

I agree with YOU!!!
I'm so sick of unprofessional people not being held accountable. This country is going to hell in a hand basket because people are either freaking out over stupid piddly stuff such as whether a parent gives their kid candy in a store... To, not doing a thing about something that actually DOES matter when little 3 yr olds are effected BY that unprofessional behavior.

We've all had tough times, but its different when your job influences the innocent. Children are innocent and should be safeguarded as such by others.

Go to the Director! I agree with your post 100%s

This country is going to hell because people have no compassion.  A person cried at work?  "WHAT ABOUT THE CHILDREN??????????"   gimme a break! 

 

aiyess
by Gold Member on Jul. 24, 2013 at 6:28 PM
Yes you are. If you were truly compassionate and caring, that hug would have met that you cared about her enough not to go and email the supervisor about how it was unprofessional and about pulling your DD out of there. That you understand she is having a personal problem and left it at that. Instead you come here telling everyone what happened.


Quoting Anonymous:

 




Quoting aiyess:

You are freaking 2 faced. First you go and hug her then to tattle tale on her. What gives? You should be more compassionate.

That's one way to view it or you could look at it that the rest of the teachers were upstairs or outside and couldn't hear what was going on downstairs.  I told the one teacher and the director because I didn't know the director was even there and I told the director because I figured maybe that teacher needed a breather...  I'm not heartless...or two faced.


 


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