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Mom Confessions Mom Confessions

Send him a pic of the evidence now, or wait until he gets home?

Posted by Anonymous   + Show Post
Dh has battled with prescription painkiller addiction for several years. I recently found out he had relapsed. I gave him an ultimatum and he has been on board.

Before the ultimatum h spent a few days with his grandma who takes prescription fentanyl patches...when he came home I noticed the outline if a sticker in his leg. I knew she took fentanyl, but they know about his addiction too and usually hide theirs. He denied it, but I think I knew anyway I just left it at that.

Now, I found an empty wrapper from the fentanyl patch in his suitcase. I know it's from that weekend.

We've been getting along fine since the ultimatum, and he used it before agreeing to work things out.

I don't want to rock the boat for something in the past if he's actually moving forward with changes. It I'm pissed. He's such an idiot. I lost my brother to a heroin overdose, and this patch could have killed him.

So do I confront him when he gets home? I took a pic of it and taped it to the bathroom mirror. It could be hours before he gets home and I'm fuming. Why should I have to suck it up while he's at work? I want to text him a picture of it now...but there's not much he can say about it. He works in customers homes.
Posted by Anonymous on Jul. 24, 2013 at 6:00 PM
Replies (21-25):
brettsmomma
by ~Tammie~ on Jul. 24, 2013 at 6:53 PM

Once you gave him the ultimatum I feel you shouldnt get mad. As long as he has been sticking to it. Just leave it as a reminder of what type of person he is when he is on drugs. Thats all i would say to him. 

Photo: -Randi.

armywifey26
by Krissy on Jul. 24, 2013 at 6:55 PM

Since it was before he agreed to the ultimatum I wouldn't make a huge deal about it. But it does need to be brought up for the simple fact that he lied about it. So maybe bring it up like "I know you lied, you know you lied, so just admit it so we can get past it. As long as you have remained clean since the ultimatum I won't hold this against you. I just want the truth" 

Anonymous
by Anonymous 1 - Original Poster on Jul. 24, 2013 at 6:58 PM
It didn't come off snarky.

I do not know from personal drug abyss but I've watched him go through withdrawals and treatment before. He was taking handfuls of OxyContin a day. He's since been mostly sober. He's had another episode that was about a year long and I was oblivious to it. I watched him detox on his own and not do treatment. This time, he claims he wasn't thing enough to go through withdrawals as bd, yet apparently he was. Fentanyl patches require opiod tolerance or they could kill you. Since he's alive and managed to keep me posted all weekend i think it's safe to assume he's been using more than he led on,

That concerns me, because he's hid if from me so well in the past I halfway wonder if he actually is getting sober or if he's feeding me bullshit,

Quoting JackieGirl007:

 Do you know how hard it is to just quit? I've been on prescribed pain meds for a long period and it was my choice to get off of them. I've never suffered a worse hell. He may need serious help. If I had to work while getting off of them I would have lost my job. I hope I'm not coming across as snarky, all I'm trying to say is that he needs help IMO. He's not doing this to be selfish, he's doing this to be able to keep functioning most likely.

JackieGirl007
by Ruby Member on Jul. 24, 2013 at 7:09 PM

 Oh man, you're probably right. I feel for you. I can imagine the fear you have for him and yourself and child. I hope he can get help.

Quoting Anonymous:

It didn't come off snarky.

I do not know from personal drug abyss but I've watched him go through withdrawals and treatment before. He was taking handfuls of OxyContin a day. He's since been mostly sober. He's had another episode that was about a year long and I was oblivious to it. I watched him detox on his own and not do treatment. This time, he claims he wasn't thing enough to go through withdrawals as bd, yet apparently he was. Fentanyl patches require opiod tolerance or they could kill you. Since he's alive and managed to keep me posted all weekend i think it's safe to assume he's been using more than he led on,

That concerns me, because he's hid if from me so well in the past I halfway wonder if he actually is getting sober or if he's feeding me bullshit,

Quoting JackieGirl007:

 Do you know how hard it is to just quit? I've been on prescribed pain meds for a long period and it was my choice to get off of them. I've never suffered a worse hell. He may need serious help. If I had to work while getting off of them I would have lost my job. I hope I'm not coming across as snarky, all I'm trying to say is that he needs help IMO. He's not doing this to be selfish, he's doing this to be able to keep functioning most likely.

 

Anonymous
by Anonymous 1 - Original Poster on Jul. 24, 2013 at 7:27 PM
Thank you. Me too.

It's so exhausting and it's going to eventually destroy this marriage and his relationship with his daughter if he doesn't get help.

Quoting JackieGirl007:

 Oh man, you're probably right. I feel for you. I can imagine the fear you have for him and yourself and child. I hope he can get help.


Quoting Anonymous:

It didn't come off snarky.

I do not know from personal drug abyss but I've watched him go through withdrawals and treatment before. He was taking handfuls of OxyContin a day. He's since been mostly sober. He's had another episode that was about a year long and I was oblivious to it. I watched him detox on his own and not do treatment. This time, he claims he wasn't thing enough to go through withdrawals as bd, yet apparently he was. Fentanyl patches require opiod tolerance or they could kill you. Since he's alive and managed to keep me posted all weekend i think it's safe to assume he's been using more than he led on,

That concerns me, because he's hid if from me so well in the past I halfway wonder if he actually is getting sober or if he's feeding me bullshit,


Quoting JackieGirl007:


 Do you know how hard it is to just quit? I've been on prescribed pain meds for a long period and it was my choice to get off of them. I've never suffered a worse hell. He may need serious help. If I had to work while getting off of them I would have lost my job. I hope I'm not coming across as snarky, all I'm trying to say is that he needs help IMO. He's not doing this to be selfish, he's doing this to be able to keep functioning most likely.


 

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