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Mom Confessions Mom Confessions

MIL wants to invite 10 extra people to DD's birthday update/ UPDATE ON THE PARTY

Posted by Anonymous   + Show Post

Actually, she technically already has. FIL's cousin moved to town recently with his wife, their 5 kids and his SIL (wife's sister) and her 2 kids. I have never met or even heard of these people, DH has never met any of these people, yet without even asking, MIL invited ALL 10 OF THEM to DD's birthday party at Chuck E Cheese (please no bashing that it is a Chuck e Cheese party, I am 35 weeks pregnant and I didn't want to deal with setting up and cleaning up after the party, plus her friend had her's there last year and she really wanted it.)

Between family and some close friends, we invited about 40 adults and 15 kids of which 34  adults and 12 kids are coming. The kids are about $20, which was fine because I knew there would be no more then 15 kids. For the adults, I pay paying for 1 drink (refillable) and 3 pieces of pizza (they are TINY at chuck e cheese). Just these additional people are going to cost me over $160, and I didn't even invite them. And I am not trying to say the party itself is too expensive, we planned for this party and we budgeted for it, we didn't plan on an extra 10 people including 7 extra kids. Not to mention I have already gone and bout the stuff for the goodie bags and put everything together so not only would I incur the extra cost but I would have to go buy more stuff for the goodie bags.

What gets me is MIL just called all casual and left the voicemail "oh BTW uncle ____ and his family moved into town so I invited them, that 3 adults and 7 kids" like it was no big deal. I told DH what his mother said and at first he was annoyed but didn't see the big deal, then I showed him how much more money it would be and he saw the big deal. He called her and told her that since she invited them, she can either pay the $175 or so it will be for the kids, adults, and for me to buy more stuff for the goodie bags for those kids or she can uninvite them. She started yelling at him saying how dare he be so disrespectful to her and that he knows they don't have that kind of money but how is she supposed to uninvite them. He told her she should have thought about that before inviting people to a party she isn't throwing. She hung up on them.

At this point, I am 99% sure she won't uninvite them and I am 99% sure she isn't going to pay for them.

I called Chuch e cheese and they were able to change the time, so that was a lucky and wonderful suggestion, thanks, T1gger143. I sent out a facebook message to everyone except MIL and FIL, no one else from the party talks to them. Anyway, by the time they get there for the 1 pm party, the party that now starts at 11 will be just about over.

UPDATE

So the party went really well. Everyone had a great time. MIL and the uninvited guests showed up just before 1. At that point, we were just about to sing Happy Birthday and have cake so they were there for that. I saved the kids some tokens so we stayed and played longer. I explained that I didn't know they were coming . It worked out well because they weren't stuck paying for themselves and the kids but the kids still got to play and have cake and we didn't have to pay extra. MIL was PISSED but oh well.

Posted by Anonymous on Jul. 28, 2013 at 4:08 PM
Replies (11-20):
Pnukey
by Jenn on Jul. 28, 2013 at 4:15 PM

Oh, see, I'd be the beotch that told the extra kids to go ask MIL for their goody bags since she invited them. Also, tell the adults to ask MIL for money for food since she invited them and was not a planner of this party.

LizzieAnnesMom
by ☆Mrs.Winchester☆ on Jul. 28, 2013 at 4:15 PM
2 moms liked this

Then I would be 99% sure I would uninvite MIL to help make up the difference. 

illinoismommy83
by on Jul. 28, 2013 at 4:16 PM
2 moms liked this

I would tell her that you are not paying for those people and what she chooses to do is up to her. If some strangers show up at your party you will be telling them its a private party and they are welcome to find a seat elsewhere and order food like a normal stranger.

SweetPea2004
by Platinum Member on Jul. 28, 2013 at 4:17 PM

Label the gift bags with the names of the invited kids and don't make extra. Also if Chuckie Cheese requires a list don't list them. I don't know how the cost jumped so much though with the extra people. 

mojogirl
by Alice Liddell on Jul. 28, 2013 at 4:17 PM
2 moms liked this

i would call the uncle/aunt and explain what happened and explain that you don't have the money for guests you haven't already budgeted for.  maybe they'll understand.....

or maybe they won't, but at least they'll know why they aren't getting drinks/food/tokens when they get there.

Anonymous
by Anonymous 3 on Jul. 28, 2013 at 4:18 PM
If she doesn't uninvite them I would be honest with them when they show up. That MIL invited them without permission and that you cannot afford the extra cost, but they are welcomed to stay if they or MIL provides for them.
CampClan
by Platinum Member on Jul. 28, 2013 at 4:20 PM
3 moms liked this

I would call the Uncle & explain it to him. "We've never met & while I would love to meet you & your family I honestly don't think _____ party is the best place for it. You have to understand that MIL did not ask us before she invited you & we simply can not afford another $170 to put into the party that we only budgeted to have (amount of people) for."

xoch86
by Gold Member on Jul. 28, 2013 at 4:20 PM

Change the time. Done! Lol

Anonymous
by Anonymous 4 on Jul. 28, 2013 at 4:22 PM
She sounds like a bitch. I would contact these people and inform them tat MIL should not have invited them you didn't plan for the extra people. (You don't know them) tell them they can pay the difference of they wanna come.
Anonymous
by Anonymous - Original Poster on Jul. 28, 2013 at 4:22 PM

The cost jumped so high because it's $20 a kid just for the chuck e cheese party, plus the goodie bags, which would be about $5 each and there are 7 kids. Right there, that is $175 plus then feeding the adults



Quoting SweetPea2004:

Label the gift bags with the names of the invited kids and don't make extra. Also if Chuckie Cheese requires a list don't list them. I don't know how the cost jumped so much though with the extra people. 



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