Join the Meeting Place for Moms!
Talk to other moms, share advice, and have fun!

(minimum 6 characters)

Mom Confessions Mom Confessions

Just wondering what other moms think

Posted by on Jul. 29, 2013 at 11:11 PM
  • 24 Replies

My son is 13 and cyber schooled (I know I say this a lot).  We do gym, bowling, swimming, field trips etc with other home schooled or cyber schooled kids.  We are a small group and pretty informal.  I am friendly with his friends as a result.  They respect me as an adult, but we chat, talk music and movies, things like that.  One girl in particular - she is 15 - is going through some stuff and confides in me a lot.  Her mom is ok with this, because she knows we have similar values and that I will go to her if there is anything to worry about.  The mom realizes sometimes it's easier to talk to someone other than a mom.

I have another friend who said I'm the kids' friends, and that's not good.  I'm not their friend, just friendly.

Is anyone else friendly with their friends kids?  (They don't call me or anything, this is all in person.)

by on Jul. 29, 2013 at 11:11 PM
Add your quick reply below:
You must be a member to reply to this post.
Replies (1-10):
liltampa71
by Platinum Member on Jul. 30, 2013 at 1:54 AM

Bump

MixedCooke
by Platinum Member on Jul. 30, 2013 at 2:16 AM

My Mom was still friends with my boyfriends even after we broke up.  She was like their second Mother.  I would hope to be the type of Mother that my kids and their friends will feel safe enough and trust enough to confide in me.

Kholt
by Bronze Member on Jul. 30, 2013 at 2:20 AM
I'm friends w my feiwnda kuds and with my kids friends. My children see me as a mom first but yet also a friend in the sense that if they need advice they can come to me. My kids friends ask for advice also and if its serious I tell them straight up I'm gonna tell their mother
teddysmama09
by on Jul. 30, 2013 at 2:28 AM
In my faith we are to look at everyone in the faith as family. I'm like an aunt to all my friends kids so I do treat them like my friends ( while still maintaining adult authority). Like you said, young people are often more open to non parental adults, and I know hen my kids are teens I'll be glad to know their getting sound advice from a responsible adult.

I only think its wrong when adults try to be the "cool" mom and let their kids and kids friends do irresponsible things.
lulalacroix
by Silver Member on Jul. 30, 2013 at 2:32 AM
I have always been liked by my kids friends. They confided in me often, but I was never the "cool" mom that helped them get away with illegal stuff. I think they just wanted an adult who listened without judgment.
1likeme
by Gold Member on Jul. 30, 2013 at 2:35 AM
I am friendly towards my kids's friends and my friends children. There is a line I do not cross and I don't pretend that we are peers. Most children just want to be heard (kind of like most people) and they want others to find what they enjoy interesting. Of course these same children also push boundaries to see what they can get away with but in my experience having a quick chat with their parents while they are present resolves that very quickly. It is important to me that everyone feels welcome but it is equally important to me that boundaries are respected too.
Bleacher-mom
by Gold Member on Jul. 30, 2013 at 2:38 AM

I'm that same way. I'll play games with my kids and their friends. My friends daughter and I have conversations when she comes over. There just needs to be a balance, As long as your kids and friends respect you as the mother and adult and will follow rules, but you dont alow them to walk all over you. Some parents take it so far just trying to be the parent and not have a close relationship with them that there is whole part of the kids' life that they keep from their parents. They don't view their parents as someone they can come to and talk to.

Pink.Frosting
by Ruby Member on Jul. 30, 2013 at 2:39 AM

I am.  My daughter's best friend will sometimes come to me before her own mom.  But her mom knows it and is ok with it.  I always tell her what her daughter says and her daughter even knows that when she tells me something, I'm going to tell her mom.  So with this one particular child, I'm ok with the arrangement.  But other kids over the years....I was always the mom all the kids would come to and I have to say that as good a thing as I always thought that was...it has caused me some problems and heart aches over the years.  At this point I've backed off and will always be friendly...but I don't really desire to be their friend.  Just too many complications.  I try to be nice but keep them at arm's length now.

Anonymous
by Anonymous 1 on Jul. 30, 2013 at 2:42 AM
My mom is not only my mother, but my best friend. And we have the greatest relationship


Quoting liltampa71:

My son is 13 and cyber schooled (I know I say this a lot).  We do gym, bowling, swimming, field trips etc with other home schooled or cyber schooled kids.  We are a small group and pretty informal.  I am friendly with his friends as a result.  They respect me as an adult, but we chat, talk music and movies, things like that.  One girl in particular - she is 15 - is going through some stuff and confides in me a lot.  Her mom is ok with this, because she knows we have similar values and that I will go to her if there is anything to worry about.  The mom realizes sometimes it's easier to talk to someone other than a mom.

I have another friend who said I'm the kids' friends, and that's not good.  I'm not their friend, just friendly.

Is anyone else friendly with their friends kids?  (They don't call me or anything, this is all in person.)


liltampa71
by Platinum Member on Jul. 30, 2013 at 3:10 AM

BUMP!

Add your quick reply below:
You must be a member to reply to this post.
Join the Meeting Place for Moms!
Talk to other moms, share advice, and have fun!

(minimum 6 characters)

close Join now to connect to
other members!
Connect with Facebook or Sign Up Using Email

Already Joined? LOG IN