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Relationship issues

Posted by on Jul. 31, 2013 at 2:53 PM
  • 9 Replies

How do You and your significant other solve your relationship issues? How often do you fight? How much fighting do u think is too much? What do u usually fight about? 


By yelling, arguing is how me and SO Solve our issues. We fight 3xs a week. I don't know I think me and so fight to much and I don't know how to stop and make things better. There's just been so many issues. We fight about Our kids, cleaning the house,money, him being so busy with work school business I feel like he doesn't have time for us, we've been dealing with bug issues at home and dealing with getting our house ready and fighting about that.. Me thinking he's cheating cuz he's not around. And we barely have sex since i havent wanted since i had my last child 19 months ago.. I don't know what to do to stop it. 

by on Jul. 31, 2013 at 2:53 PM
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Replies (1-9):
deenakate
by on Jul. 31, 2013 at 2:55 PM

I don't yell, I talk, we talk it out, when we are having disagreements, the floor is open and we only talk about the subject at hand, we don't bring up past issues and we don't say anything we don't mean. Open communication is important to me and my SO. 

Anonymous
by Anonymous 1 on Jul. 31, 2013 at 2:56 PM

yelling and arguing? 

have you tried talking?  if you can't have a normal conversation you're both childish.

adults don't need to yell and scream, do they?

wooly
by Knitting Maniac on Jul. 31, 2013 at 3:00 PM

 We've been married over 23 years and we've yet to have a fight. We might not agree on something, but we just discuss it and if we still don't agree we just walk away. A lot of young couples fight over lack of money and kids. The kids were mine from before we got married and we've never had a money problem. We don't overspend and we don't have any debt except the mortgage.  We also don't have any trust issues, in fact I'm going away this weekend with a friend for a spinning retreat and to get away and celebrate our b-days. Hers was Sunday and mine will be on Sunday this week. We leave early Friday morning and won't be back until next Wed. He'll be working and taking care of the animals.

our.love.story
by Platinum Member on Jul. 31, 2013 at 3:02 PM

I get mad and yell and he just calmly tries to talk it out and then I'll walk away. We rarely ever fight, honestly. We see eye to eye about most things and are able to talk things out. I'll admit I'm really spoiled so I get my way but if it's something he really cares about, he'll stand his ground. Right now he's deployed so we try really hard not to fight about anything as I don't want any extra stress on him so I just kind of let things slide. 

I think it's too much when you feel it's too much and is a problem...I know couples that have one fight and it's too much for them and they want out and I know others that fight constantly but don't see a problem with it, it has to be what you're comfortable with.

We usually fight about the fact that he's okay sitting at home and I want to go out but it makes sense...he works, I don't, he is out and about a lot, I'm not. We don't really fight about much else really.

Anonymous
by Anonymous 2 on Jul. 31, 2013 at 3:02 PM

We used to fight when we first got married.  We then went back to church found a marriage counselor and we've been fine ever since.  We have discussions, they're calm and we never argue over the kids.  Sex is minimum - once per week.  We worked it out because we were married.  its worth fighting for then.  I guess you have to figure out why you even want to be in this relationship.  I've been married 10years.

SpiritFortress
by on Jul. 31, 2013 at 3:11 PM

Try having discussions instead of fighting matches. Sometimes couples counseling can be really helpful in helping couples establish good communication skills. 

apollothor
by on Jul. 31, 2013 at 3:12 PM

Tell him that you would like to make an appointment with him to listen to his concerns and have him listen to yours. Agree to discuss and  not scream at each other. Are you able to send the kids out of the house to a relative for the night. Tell him that you will both need to stick to the issue, like, for example, if he says that something needs to be done regularly in the house and he's angry about it, don't come up with, oh yeah, and I hate your mother. Stick to the issue. If you can't behave yourselves and speak to each other like adults, you are going to have to blow money on a marriage counsellor which might be good or might kill your finances and add more stress. In any case,  who the hell wants to be fighting 3 times per week with someone that you supposedly love. Ask him if the fighting is making him happy. Tell him that you want to change and ask him if he wants to change too.  This fighting is bad for your kids if there is so much of it. When they get older, they won't want to hear it and they'll stay out all night and get into trouble.  They'll be fighting with you both every day. Who the hell needs to live like that. A plant might be able to live like that....I'm not saying that we need to live in Care Bear World  where everything thing is hunky dorey hearts and flowers all the time but why not live in a relationship where you at least can be kind, considerate, and respectful of each other and know that you do love each other.

connorsmom2009
by on Jul. 31, 2013 at 3:37 PM

BUMP!

connorsmom2009
by on Sep. 6, 2013 at 1:08 AM

BUMP!

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