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Help me, please!!!

Anonymous
Posted by Anonymous
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I have a Protection Order and child custody hearing on Monday. I was also advised by a lawyer to request permission from the judge to move out of state with my daughter. I have to prove why it is best for her. On top of that I have to prove how dangerous my ex is (the latter won't be hard.)

I'm sitting here wondering if a judge is going to think I'm being bat shit crazy and just want my ex away from my daughter (which is not the case. Well it sort of is, because he is incredibly abusive) or if he will understand I want to move to better my DD"s life.

Right now I live in a TINY town. Well, actually, I live 3 miles out of town. It is the only place I have to stay here. My ex totaled my car a few months ago so I have no transportation and our one bus does not come out of town. I can't find a job because the job market is dead here. Everyone is either on PA and living off the system without ever going anywhere or moved here with a college degree and managed to get a good job working for the Power Plant or Hospital. Unfortunately, I do not have a college degree and I don't want to live on PA forever (I'm not on any right now because I was supposed to be moving, but if they make me stay I will have to be to survive.) I simply cannot support my daughter here. There is no way for me to attend school, or get a job to come up with the money to attend school. I could do online but I would still have to pay for it. Which again, cannot be done without a job.

I want to work and support myself and my daughter. More than anything I want to be standing on my own two feet. If I moved to my mom's I could do that. She lives in a city, I already have a job lined up out there, there is public transportation and my mom has a car I can use if the busses aren't running at the right times. I can go to school and my mom can watch my DD so I won't have to pay for child care. I won't have to be on any public assistance and I can get money saved up for my own place while attending college. In just a few years I could have a really good job and be able to move out on my own and be completely self sufficiant. If I stay here there is no way in hell that's happening. I will be cleaning house once a week living wih my dad and on PA forever.... There is just NOTHING here.

In your opinion does moving sound like what would be best for my DD in the long run? Her dad has no visitation because of the protection order but I won't know until the hearing ton Monday how long that will last. She is only three months old and I have probably 20 witnesses or better that can attest her dad wanted nothing to do with her when she was born. Or after I left him. He wouldn't even hold her. Now, completely out of the blue, he wants full custody from me.

I'm not an unfit mother, so I am not worried about that. I just want to move so I can better my situation and actually provide a good life for my child. Moving doesn't sound like the wrong thing, does it?

I mean, if you were in this situation wouldn't you want to better it and get back up on your feet? Not sit stale in a tiny town with nothing to offer you or your baby?

I really just want what's best for my baby. That's all. Do you think a judge might see it like that? Or do you think he will assume I'm just being vindictive and trying to take her from her father?

Posted by Anonymous on Jul. 31, 2013 at 8:17 PM
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