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How do you know 100% you're done

Anonymous
Posted by Anonymous
  • 23 Replies
Having babies?

I've been saying I'm definitely DONE since my 3rd (he's under 2)

But when I start to think about "permanant" action to make it so (tubal, vasectomy) it makes me sad! The idea of never even having the option, makes me anxious.

I'm not sure what freaks me out more, having another or deciding not to, if that makes sense.

I think DH would be on board if I really wanted another.

Problems:

- I can't picture baby ds being very good with a newborn

-baby ds is a handful, harder than the other 2 by a lot, what if new baby is as well?

-money, although we would make it work, it will be that much tighter

-I'm not ready RIGHT now to have another, but it'd have to happen within 1-2 years tops, I don't want to be in the toddler stage for 10 years, plus I'm already 32, not interested in popping out babies in my 40s


So,

How do I know?!

There are days where I thank my lucky stars I'm done, there are times when I'd like to do it all again, is that just me trying to hold on to the faint ticking of my biological clock lol?


Posted by Anonymous on Aug. 7, 2013 at 6:36 AM
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Replies (1-10):
justpeachy71904
by peachy on Aug. 7, 2013 at 6:43 AM
I've never wanted more until now. Now I am in a craze. But sort of worried. It is weird
Anonymous
by Anonymous - Original Poster on Aug. 7, 2013 at 6:45 AM
Do you think it's more so that we are scared of closing the door to that part of our lives?
Anonymous
by Anonymous on Aug. 7, 2013 at 6:47 AM
I questioned this too. So I didn't get the surgery or let my husband. ( I didn't stop him but talked to him at length about not doing it yet). If you're questioning it, you're not ready.

I have 4 kids. I wasn't sure if I wanted another after 3 but I was positive after #4. This is why.

I knew I couldn't mentally handle another.

I knew financially it would put a strain on us.

I didn't want to be raising kids into my 50's.

I am ready to have more me time and couples time.

I physically didn't want to do it again and have another surgery.

I am totally happy and fulfilled with my 2 boys and 2 girls.

My husband and I both were "fixed". Hate that term.
Anonymous
by Anonymous on Aug. 7, 2013 at 6:47 AM
1 mom liked this
Why not try an I.u.d. So it's not something permanent and if you change your mind have it taken out
yo_ho
by Silver Member on Aug. 7, 2013 at 6:47 AM
1 mom liked this
Dh and I were just talking about this. Apparently I talked him into a third and 4 is out of the question. I just hate the finality of no more.
AHmom103
by Gold Member on Aug. 7, 2013 at 6:50 AM

For me, I knew I was done when the idea of going through pregnancy again made me sick to my stomach. I loved being pregnant, but when I was pregnant with my second, I knew 100% I never wanted to do that again. My husband and I are both young enough that if we want more kids later, we can adopt or take in foster kids.

Anonymous
by Anonymous - Original Poster on Aug. 7, 2013 at 6:52 AM
This! It's the finality of NO that doesn't sit right.

Also I used to have an iud, it hurt like a motherfucker to put in and take out, I'd rather just be celebate lol! Poor hubby


Quoting yo_ho:

Dh and I were just talking about this. Apparently I talked him into a third and 4 is out of the question. I just hate the finality of no more.

Anonymous
by Anonymous - Original Poster on Aug. 7, 2013 at 6:52 AM
I know what will happen, just like last time, ill lose 30 lbs, feel great, get pregnant lol
Anonymous
by Anonymous on Aug. 7, 2013 at 6:54 AM

I had to have a hysterectomy and I understand what you mean.

I have two wonderful kids and felt done.Yet knowing I cant anymore makes me feel bad sometimes.

I would just get depo shots or another long term option.Speak to your GYN.

rosiemarie
by on Aug. 7, 2013 at 6:58 AM
Because at 40 there is no way I want to go back to sleepless nights, crying, bottling feeding, and diapering changing!
I just got my sleep back ( some what of course you mothers know what I mean) and a little freedom since they are both in school full time!!!
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