**EDIT**If you have had a hysterectomy, had your tubes tied, or are an educated person in general, lol, PLEASE give insight!!
Okay, for those who don't know let me give the history here. DH & I had 2 boys. DH gets vasectomy, but 13 months later I become pg with boy #3. Initial testing said DH was clear, later testing showed the vasectomy failed. We used protection for a year, just like suggested. We literally went one month without protection and BAM! So, after having boy #3 I decided to have my tubes cut, clamped, and burned. What do ya know. Almost exactly 18 mos later we find out I am pregnant again with #4 (a girl that time, yay!). A few doctors studied the case, and after dd was born they found that everything was done properly. It was just an absolute fluke. They could not figure out how it happened, but went ahead and put another clamp on each end of each tube and wished me luck.
HOWEVER, every month I freak the fuck out. I start every month anytime from the 28th to the 2nd. During that time, I am freaking out. Honestly, it is my absolute worst fear to find out that I am pregnant again. All of my 4 kids are failrly close in age, but now that my youngest is starting pre-school, I have landed a job, and I FINALLY get to use my degree I am so nervous that another pregnancy will ruin everything. I just could not go through with an abortion, and if we had another we would suck it up and do it, but I honestly live in fear of this. Ugh, that would be eve worse.
Do you think they would consider a hyterectomy? I am deathly afraid of surgery, but my fear of another pregnancy trumps it 10 fold.
What do you think? What would you do? And DH getting another vasectomy is really out of the cards, due to his job.
Thank you all for your input. I understand i may sound irrational for wanting to take such a drastic step just for birth control, but you have not walked in my shoes. DH & I made a commitment to not send any of our children to daycare. I have been a WAHM for years, just sitting on this degree. I feel like now that our lives are really starting, a child would be worse now than ever. I have completely researched it and know this is what I want. I understand the side effects and welcome them in opposition of a nother child. I also know the doctor will most likely say No. I can respect and understand that. I plan to start ovulation tracking and asking my doc (if he says no) what alternatives there are. I cannot do the Essure or pill bc.