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Wasn't it easier to be "poor?"

Posted by Anonymous   + Show Post
When my husband and I were first married we lived in a trailer. Our rent was like $250 a month. We had a car that we shared and paid about $1000 in all for. We didn't have Internet, iPhones or even cable. We watched movies. Back then we were relaxed and happy. I had no worried! Now I feel like life has overwhelmed me and even though we are "well off" now sometimes I want to go back to the simple life. Sometimes I had to dig change under the seat just to buy milk but we were soo happy. We had so much fun.

Those telling me to just go back to that. I would if it was just me but its not all about me. My husband wants the lifestyle we have and he's worked hard for it so its selfish of me to force my wants in the entire family
Posted by Anonymous on Aug. 18, 2013 at 10:05 AM
Replies (81-90):
by Gold Member on Aug. 18, 2013 at 12:28 PM

I totally see your point its not just us anymore if we had control over that we would go back, but life has changed so much some people want to live with today's stuff. I would love to live it simple again it was the good old fashioned way back in the day. 

by on Aug. 18, 2013 at 12:33 PM

We're just the opposite - I had a decent amount of money (not rich by any means) when the hubs and I first met.

I had gone through a divorce and I'd received my half of the estate. I also negotiated a way to receive my alimony up front in one lump sum rather than taking it in pay out over 5 years. 

But eventhough I had a little cusion, I was still living very conservatively. When the hubs and I first met I was living in a trailer in a trailer park. (A big step down from where I was in my first marriage - very humbling to say the least)

THEN a few weeks before we got married I got hurt on the job and eventually became disabled. Thank God I'd used the money that I got to purchase a piece of land and put a good chunk down on our house. 

For the last 7-8 years we've progressivly gone down in our income, but we made a point to NOT use credit cards to live on, and NOT to live above our means. So now that I've settled my workers comp. injury case we finally have some cusion again, but instead of taking the money and blowing it we're investing it for the future/retirement. 

The way I figure it we've been living comfortably on less for so long, why go nuts and spend it all at once? 

I did treat myself to a new truck, but the rest is getting invested right after we pay a couple of small bills and put braces on the kids.

by Ruby Member on Aug. 18, 2013 at 12:40 PM


Quoting my4kids274:

We are not rich by any stretch of the means but I will take us having money in the bank over our financial a situation when we first got married.

by on Aug. 18, 2013 at 12:43 PM

 seriously?  living paycheck to paycheck, not having anything in savings for emergencies is not fun, especially with children.  i don't want to be rich by anymeans, everything has it's headaches & issues after all, but i would like to have a bit more so hubby & i don't have to work so hard & can enjoy life more.  we aren't destitute by any means but hubby works about 70hrs a week which means we don't see him much.  having a bit more financial security would mean our family could spend more time together.

by Anonymous 18 on Aug. 18, 2013 at 12:46 PM

I understand 100%. Dh works hard but we pretty much work for bills now. At times, I wish I had my $400 rent for a 2 bed room apartment, and $100 light bill. Now I have 2700sq ft house with a $300 light bill. I always think of it. When I see an older car... all I can think of is how much I want that. Only because there is no payment. Things were jsut simpler without many bills as now. We make it but it wasn't as complicated back then. 

by Anonymous 19 on Aug. 18, 2013 at 12:48 PM

 i was raised in somewhat poverty, despite  that by rigth after i was born my parents bought a house out in the country it was just  a boxy U  shaped house but my dad got to work fast on  building it up! i have memories  as far back as age 2  my dad build a huge living area filling in where the U  part was so the house was a big rectangle. but the house was originally 5 bedrooms 2 bath. oh and one end of the U was the big garage that could fit  4 cars basicaly 2 rows of 2 cars) my dad did not stop there, he build an upstairs, 2 actual bedrooms one bathroom on the end and a masive room for im not sure what, but it was used as storage, but if he had put drywall in the middle it would have been another 2 huge bedroom or living areas.   he furnished the house mainly by going to auctions or by  driving around town picking up  furniture and things people set on their curbs. my dad was very resourceful in re-using things and building as well as farming there was always a huge garden that  after my little brother was born  our family of 8 had to tend, and also help with canning. also taking care of cows, pigs chickens, turkeys ect ect.  back when we went to church every sunday  they loaded the van down with  tons of eggs and sold them in the parking lot after mass. my dad was diabled in a car accident while on duty on base, my mom had pretty much always been a home maker. looking back at what their finances would have been we more than qualified for food stamps ect but they never applied (pride) we did not have cable, we got 3 channels if lucky. i was happy when i was alone with the cats and dogs pretty much or the farm animals. ive blocked out alot of my childhood due to sexual abuse a much older sibling did to me. when i was 17 we moved to a much  more tiny house down the road, my dads friend passed away so he bought his house.

 while  me and dh are poor still and pretty sure we always will be, things always come up or happen. we do have internet, i prefer netflix over cable lol and as for phones all i need the dang thing to do is send texts and make calls, oh and alarm clocks on the phone . we do like gaming and prior to even meeting my husband i had desptops custom built for gaming they were 2k each, been 5 yrs and havent had to update anything they are still badass. i dont care for fancy keyboards though lol. we have a change jar we raid when we need to.

 if we came into alot of money i dont think id get cable or a fancy phone, but id definatly buy a bedframe for our bed, buy a much needed new couch, a new bedframe for the kids as theirs is coming apart. but we really would not change much. but having 2 kids and money so tight yeah we stress alot.

 find ways to downsize or cut back in other ways, take kids on more nature like or free things to go do. and when you need it  cut the cord from electronics for a bit, it can reduce your stress much more once you get over the initial frekout of not being in contact  through this way, make plans with friends for face to face time rather than only over the internet which is how things seem to be now-a-days.

by Silver Member on Aug. 18, 2013 at 12:48 PM
I long for easier, happier times:(
Posted on CafeMom Mobile
by Desiree` on Aug. 18, 2013 at 12:49 PM

 I could not agree was simpler, stress was less and fun was easy.

by Silver Member on Aug. 18, 2013 at 12:53 PM

You had to dig change under the seat just to buy milk, but you had "no worries"?  

What worries do you have now that are so overwhelming?  I'm genuinely curious.  

by Anonymous 1 - Original Poster on Aug. 18, 2013 at 12:56 PM
I wasn't really worried. I didn't care that I was digging in the couch. That's not really a worry compared to taxes, retirement, college funds, paying a shit ton of bills not to mention my husband isn't around all the time like he used to be.

Quoting one_on_the_way:

You had to dig change under the seat just to buy milk, but you had "no worries"?  

What worries do you have now that are so overwhelming?  I'm genuinely curious.  

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